Innermost Feelings
by soulmatesDC
Summary: Derek and Casey have secret feelings that they thought only they knew. What happens when they realize everyone else knows their innermost feelings? And will they ever reveal their feelings to each other? . . . Eventual Dasey.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: This is my first Life with Derek fic. I kind of have this story in my head. But please read and review. Let me know how I am doing and if you want more. Thanks and enjoy!

* * *

Chapter 1: Secrets under the Bed

_I can't believe the lies I am writing,_ Casey thought to herself as she wrote. She looked up to her door, making sure it was not locked. No, of course she did not want it locked when she was writing in her diary. At least she did not want it locked when she was writing in this diary, the one she knew that Lizzie and Edwin secretly read. She actually left the door open sometimes as she wrote, so that they can see she was writing, and see that she hid it in the top drawer on her desk. And she always left that fuzzy pink pen that she always wrote with in the book, peeking out of the top, so they would know it was her diary that she was writing into when they glanced in when they casually walked by.

As she wrote the last 3 words into her pseudo diary, her heart sank. Casey knew them to be a lie, but she still wrote them, to complete her entry. She looked down with the tears in her eyes, feeling terrible for writing them, closing the book and putting it in her drawer. A single tear fell when they appeared in her mind, "I HATE HIM."

Wiping the tear, she walked over to her door, now turning her lock for the privacy she so desperately needed. As she turned, she lingered with her eyes staring at that wall, the wall separating the two of them. Casey desperately wanted to claw at the wall, tearing it down, tearing down the wall around her heart. All she could do was sigh.

Casey walked over to her bed and gently lifted the mattress. She grabbed the plainer book from under the mattress, not as girly as her fake diary, just a normal black and white notebook. The pages were not as flat as her other diary, a little wrinkled from the tears that came so many nights before. She poured her heart and soul into this notebook. Sure, the other one held some truth, like fights with her friend Emily or how she was worried about a test, but her heart was left for this one.

After reaching into her bag for the pen she needed to write with, she sat on her bed. This pen was completely un-Casey. It was old and capless, with bite marks on the top, but she needed to write with it, the ink inside needed to be what formed her words.

Casey just turned, looking at that wall again, trying to think about what to write, even though she knew she did not have to think at all. The thoughts always seemed to flow so naturally, like the perfect song always came on the radio when he came into her head.

Sad songs played when she was upset. Happy songs played when she was excited. And those love songs came on when she started thinking about him.

She looked down to begin to write and realized that she had already been writing. Not surprised though, Casey always seemed to do things subconsciously when she was thinking about him. Her eyes scan the page she had written, stopping on the last 5 words.

"I think I love him" stared up at her, tears swelling in her big blue eyes. It was the first time those words came out, sure she thought it all the time, but they were actually staring up at her now, smacking her in the face. She would never write them down, terrified that someone would see them and know her secret. She then took the pen and crossed out the first two words, knowing that she really did love Derek.

Looking at the clock on her night stand, seeing it to be 11:45pm, she placed her diary back under her bed and decided she needed a snack.

* * *

_Incomplete_ was all that would cross Derek's mind. That was how he felt all the time. He thought how his popularity was something people looked up to, always putting him on top, but it was so lonely up there. Sure, he had friends and girls threw themselves at him all the time, but he could never convey his true feelings. He thought that he didn't even know what his true feelings were, but then they slapped in the face. Like how can he be so blind to what he wanted, who he loved. Nobody would understand which caused him to feel so lonely, so incomplete without her.

His eyes were fixated on that wall, that alluring wall, that wall that separated them. He formed a love/hate relationship with that wall, loving what was behind but hated that it way in his way. Derek hated that it blocked his heart to the world.

Derek hadn't even realized that he had a pen and a pad in his hand. Earlier that day Derek needed to grab a new pen from his desk drawer, he couldn't seem to find his pen anywhere. His hand was moving and the ink was flowing from the pen, occasionally bringing it to his mouth subconsciously, nibbling on the end.

After what felt like hours, he reluctantly tore his eyes from the wall. Looking down at his desk he noticed the pad and the picture he doodled. Derek always had a thing for drawing. He was particularly good at it, doodling cartoons when he should have been taking notes in class. He just never gave into it though; he couldn't be an artsy guy and the most popular one at the same time. He began really drawing over the past two years, he even drew an amazing picture of himself and Marti for her birthday. He only began when he found his muse.

He hadn't even looked down at it once as he drew it. Letting out a long, painful sigh, he ripped the page from the drawing pad. Derek only got the pad recently, but more than half the pages were torn out. He grabbed a lighter from the shelf and held the drawing over his trash can.

Before flicking the lighter, he noticed something. The primarily black drawing had another color in it. _When did I pick up that blue pen to color in her eyes?_ He put the lighter back on the shelf and walked towards his bed. He gently lifted the mattress and placed the new drawing with the rest, all of them black with that little speck of blue, all of them looking like a photograph of Casey.

Derek took out a pad and decided he needed to write. This was another new pastime of his. Derek wrote a lot, most of the time he burned his letters though. Looking over this one though, he noticed the last 3 words before his name, "I love you." He folded it and placed it in an envelope, sealing it and placing it under his mattress.

Glancing at clock, he decided he was not tired. And at 11:45pm he decided to go get a snack.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Thanks for all the support. I will always accept help and criticism. Don't be too mean!

Thanks Kitty-mrow, never thought of it that way for the first chapter. I will definately incorporate what you said in later chapters.

Enjoy!

* * *

Chapter 2: Sweets 

BAM! Casey smacked right into Derek. It was so dark in the hall and she was so overwhelmed with her thoughts that she did not see him. Derek was also lost in his own little world to even see her. Before either of them could react, Derek was holding Casey in his arms, leaning over her with her arms around his neck.

If it was a romantic movie, Derek would lean in and give Casey the most amazing kiss of her life. Unfortunately for both of them, it was just another night in the Venturi/MacDonald household.

_Oh my god, I'm going to fall down the stairs and break my neck._ Casey thought at she twirled into the ground. She then noticed the arms wrap around her, spinning her to face him. Her arms instinctively wrapped around his neck, trying to find some balance as she felt she was going to hit the floor.

His arms fit so perfectly around her body, molding into every crevice. All those years of hockey gave Derek the strength to hold Casey in his arms without any strain. Casey couldn't help but feel Derek's arm and chest muscle. Over the past 3 years living in that house with him, she noticed how he developed from a lanky teenager into a built man, but not over the top with muscles. Hockey had always kept him toned, but he really grew into his body, and Casey was really appreciating hockey at this time.

As Casey started to fall after crashing into Derek, his first instinct was to not let her get hurt. He quickly grabbed her and spun her towards him. As she spun in his arms, her hair gently brushed against his face. The smell of her shampoo was intoxicating and he was swept away into a world of coconuts.

_Shit!_ They both thought at the same time. After allowing Casey to gain her balance and get to her feet, he let go of her. Over the years the touch of one another was enticing, but neither let the touch linger too long. They were always terrified that the other would realize the hidden feelings and things would be destroyed. They were too embarrassed to go for what they wanted, afraid of rejection.

_He knows! Shit! He knows. What the hell am I going to do? Why did I have to hold on to him? _"Thanks" mumbled out of her mouth. Afraid to look at him, she rushed down the stairs and into the kitchen.

Casey went to the refrigerator and took out milk and the cookies she baked earlier that day. After placing a few on a plate, she placed them into the microwave for 1 minute.

* * *

_Casey got home from the mall that day around 1pm. She looked at the note on the table, seeing Derek was out playing hockey with friends and everyone else was at the zoo. She figured she had a little bit of time for herself and decided she wanted something sweet. Her body began moving without her mind telling her to._

_The ingredients were out and she began to start mixing everything together. She had baked chocolate chip cookies so many times before that she didn't need to look at the recipe. _

_Casey knew that Derek liked sweets after playing hockey. She knew he loved homemade chocolate chip cookies. She knew he liked them warm, but from the microwave and not the oven. She knew they would be cool by the time he got home._

_She began humming to the song on the radio as she began placing small balls of dough onto the cookie sheet. Casey's favorite way to make cookies was to press down the ball of dough with her thumb and put the chocolate chips on top. She loved that initial taste of chocolate as the cookie entered her mouth. After a few trays were done, she started on her last as her thoughts drifted away from her. _

_Casey started thinking about Derek. She always seemed to be in a trance when she thought about him, like her body was on autopilot. He consumed her every thought. She wondered if he would win his game, or go out to dinner with the guys, or sit with her tonight when she watched tv. Casey wanted to call him and see if he had plans or if he would be home tonight. She wanted to know if he would be near her._

_As she took the last tray out of the oven, she glanced down at the 5 remaining cookies on the tray. She couldn't remember placing the chips into the shape of letters. She looked down and sighed at the D-E-R-E-K that stared up at her. _

_She was so caught up in her thoughts that Casey didn't hear the front door open. She was snapped back to reality when she heard her mother's voice from the other side of the kitchen door._

"_Honey, the cookies smell great." Nora said as she entered the kitchen. Casey instinctively grabbed the 5 cookies and shoved them into her mouth at once. She couldn't even look up to her mother. "I was just really in the mood for something sweet," Casey mumbled after she finally swallowed, glancing down at the counter. She was completely unaware of the knowing look on her mother's face._

* * *

Derek was left at the top of the stairs in a daze when Casey ran off. The fascinating smell of her hair could keep him in a stupor for hours. The amazing smell of coconuts with the small fruity fragrance of her skin drove him crazy. He knew what perfume she wore, the cheaper stuff smelling of apples that kept him up at night. He knew that she would never buy anything expensive.

When Casey first moved in during the union of the Venturi's and MacDonald's, Derek would always try to get up early in the morning to get to the shower first, knowing that it got on her nerves. After his feelings towards her changed, he would always wake up a little later, so he would enter a bathroom with the smell of her shampoo and perfume enveloping him. He began to love the mix of coconuts and apples.

He began thinking about how stupid he was to hold her so close. _Damn it, she knows and will never talk to me again. _But he knew that he would not let her get hurt, he could not see her in any pain. _Why did I have to hold her so close?_ Derek was terrified to face her and see a look of disgust in her face, because he knew that she would never want to be so close to him.

The scent of cookies took his fear away as he found himself in front of the kitchen door. He didn't know how he got there, but he knew he was drawn to her, drawn to everything about her. He opened the door and saw near the counter, with a cookie to her lips. He sat down across the table and just stared at her.

She obviously did not notice him come into the kitchen. She was completely oblivious when she was focused on her thoughts. Derek could not help but wonder what would keep her in such a trance. What was so important to her, if she ever was swept away thinking about him.

He reached out and took a cookie from her plate. He was always amazed that cookies were always made when he was in the mood, especially after playing hockey. He was also amazed at the difference in taste her cooking had compared to Nora's. He always knew when she cooked. He could smell it in the air. And the tantalizing taste of everything always made him go for more. He would never get seconds in front of her though, afraid that eating her food would show his true feelings. He always snuck down in the middle of the night to get what he craved, any leftovers made by Casey.

Derek couldn't help but notice how perfect she looked in the slight light coming in the window from the moon. He was absolutely mesmerized by everything about her. The curves of her body, the smoothness of her skin, her captivating eyes. _She had such natural beauty to her and she doesn't even know it. _Casey had grown up and filled out during the 3 years that Derek knew her. He loved every single inch of her body. But it was not only her body that he loved. He loved her feistiness, her brains, and her ability to talk to anyone and make them feel completely comfortable. He loved the way he felt being near her, just sitting next to her watching tv.

Casey still hadn't noticed that Derek was with her in the kitchen, eating her cookies. It was when he was drinking from her cup that she noticed she was not alone. After reaching for a cup to come up empty handed, Casey looked up and saw Derek finishing her milk.

"Derek! Why do you have to always take my stuff?" Casey said staring at Derek's upper lip. _Maybe I could just lick his upper lip and explain that I was dying of dehydration. Yup, he will definitely believe that._

"Casey, why do you always have to have what I want?" Derek said before he could help himself. _Oh my god! What did I just say? She knows now, she has to._ Derek immediately looked down at the counter, mentally kicking himself. He felt her gorgeous blue eyes boring a hole into his brain.

_What does that mean? Why would he word it like that?_ Casey's mind was running a mile a minute. _He couldn't want me could he? Of course not Casey, don't read too much into it._ "Fine Derek, I'm going to bed. Enjoy the rest of my cookies."

Casey pushed her plate across the table towards Derek as she got up to leave. He smirked just a little bit. But it was not the smirk he used to have. It has changed, but just around her. It was always a little more of a smile than a smirk when he was with her.

Just as she was about to push open the kitchen door Derek called her name, which always made her heart skip a beat. "Hey Case."

"What Der?" Derek inwardly sighed, loving the name she called him when she was annoyed. Or that's the emotion he thought she had when she called him that.

"Are you scared?" he asked her.

Hesitating, Casey decided not to lie. "Yeah, I am a little." With that, Casey left Derek alone in the dark kitchen as she headed up to her room.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: This chapter was a lot harder for me to write than I expected. I knew what I wanted to say and where I wanted to end up, but the journey was harder than expected. Even if you hate it let me know, because it is not my favorite.

This entire chapter happens in the past (about 4 months before the first two chapters), but I did not want to make everything in italics.

Please review and if you have suggestions, they are always welcome.

Disclaimer: Don't own.

* * *

Chapter 3: Unexpected Decisions  


About four months before their night of secrets and cookies . . .

Casey came home with the mail in her hands, staring at it in awe. Derek looked up from the dining room table, where he was eating some apple pie that Casey baked the night before. He saw the look on her face and was a little afraid. He had no idea that what was affecting her would affect him as well.

"Hey Case, you ok?"

After a few seconds she realized he said something. "Huh, what? Sorry Derek what did you say?" She looked into his eyes. He saw the hopefulness and fear in her eyes, but he did not want to seem too eager.

"What came in the mail?" He was a little intrigued. Derek had been waiting for something important to come for a few weeks.

Casey took her piece, which was on the top in the box and sat down on the couch and stared at the envelope in her hands. She left the rest on Derek's recliner. He said down and flipped through the pile until the letter he was waiting for stared at him. He let the rest of the mail fall to the floor at his feet as he held his mail in his hands.

2 hours past and neither of them said a word. They just gazed at their own pieces of mail, barely moving. The front door opened and their family came in. After being asked about 5 times what was wrong, both just shook their heads and ran up to their respective rooms.

Derek paced his room for about 5 minutes before he sat on his bed. He could not believe that it was there and he would finally know. He slowly turned the envelope over and gently tore it open. Derek pulled out the first of many sheets and began to read . . .

**Congratulations Mr. Venturi, we are happy to inform you that you have been accepted into the fall freshman class at the University of Toronto.**

Derek could not believe it, he actually made it in. He had one of the biggest smiles on his face until he lifted his head and stared at that wall, making his smile drop a bit. _I guess this is it then. We only have this summer and then we will be apart for most of the year. Hopefully it will change my feelings and I can finally get over her._

Casey sat at her desk when she entered her room. She grabbed her letter opener and carefully opened the envelope. Casey pulled out the first of many sheets and began to read . . .

**Congratulations Miss MacDonald, we are happy to inform you that you have been accepted into the fall freshman class at the University of Toronto.**

She began to tear up, so happy that she got into the university of her choice. She began taking the rest of the letters out of the envelope. She looked over the campus map and the courses offered for freshmen. She finally pulled out the last sheet, which explained that she received a full scholarship for her grades and short stories.

Casey was so pleased with herself. She finally tore her eyes away from her paperwork and they immediately went to that wall. The tears began to fall. _It's over. Nothing will ever happen now. We will be too far apart. Hopefully my heart will finally stop loving him._

"Derek, Casey. Time for dinner." Nora called from downstairs, unaware that she was snapping the both of them from their thoughts.

When everyone was seated at the dining room table, Casey and Derek both began, ""I have some news . . ."

Derek and Casey looked at each other and when their eyes met, they quickly looked at the table. George and Nora looked at each other and said in unison "Well, what is it?"

Without a second passing by, both Casey and Derek blurt out "I got into the University of Toronto!" Their eyes shot up into the other's gaze. It seemed like the world stopped for the two. They saw and heard nothing else. They only saw blue and brown, hearing their respective heart beats in their chests.

George and Nora both gave each other that knowing look that they had so many times before. They were both asking questions, but neither Derek nor Casey heard them. Finally, Nora reached out her hands and nudged the two, who lost their gaze on one another and looked throughout the room.

"I thought we all agreed that you both were going to go the University of Ottawa, so you can stay at home. We agreed that you would have to stay home so that we can afford college for all five of you." George said talking to Derek and Casey, but giving his wife a look as if saying 'Do you think they planned this?'

Noticing the look on George's face she asked the question that he did not, "Was this planned, to go to the same university as each other?"

Derek met Casey's eyes once again, "I had no idea Casey wanted to go there. They have a great arts program and an amazing hockey team. I applied without telling anyone."

"Me too. I thought that I was applying alone. But it is the one school I really want to go to. It has an amazing writing program. I even received a full scholarship because of my grades and short stories that I submitted."

"My scholarship!" Derek shouted, cutting Casey off before leaving the dining room and heading towards the stairs. He ran into his room and grabbed the rest of the papers in the envelope that he did not bother looking through before. He finally found the one that he was looking for. A huge smile crossed his lips. He also received a full scholarship, for his grades and pictures he submitted. At this point, Casey's words entered his head . . . 'But it is the one school I really want to go to.' _I had no idea that the both of us wanted to go to the same place. I guess maybe we still might have a chance. _

When Derek finally reached the dining room, he heard Nora tell Casey that since she got a scholarship she can go to whatever school she wanted.

"Yeah well, I kind of got a full scholarship as well. They gave me one because of hockey and my drawings . . ." He did not want to sound to enthused that he might be going to the same school as the love of his life, but he couldn't help but smile. He handed the scholarship paper to his father and sat in his seat, sneaking glances towards Casey.

_Are we really going to be attending the same school? _Casey had a huge smile plastered on her face. She really wanted to attend the University of Toronto, but she did not want to not be around Derek. _Maybe now is our chance to be together._

"Well, I guess you will both be going to the University of Toronto." George says before handing Derek back his scholarship paper.

"Great" escaped excitingly from Casey's lips before she could stop herself. _Stupid! What the hell is wrong with you!_ Her eyes shot up and met Derek's. "I mean, it's great that we both got into the school we each really want to go to."

"Yeah, it's really great." Derek mumbled, knowing he looked way to eager than he should be. He only held his eyes with hers for another moment, before looking back down at his food.

* * *

Later that evening, when everyone else went to bed, Derek went downstairs to watch tv in the living room. Seeing the soft light from the top of the stairs, he became very excited, knowing who was down there.

After sitting in his recliner, he noticed something was wrong. _Why is she channel surfing? She never does that. Maybe she's upset that we are going to college together. Maybe she wanted to be 2 hours away from me. _"Hey Case, what's with the glum face?"

"I think I should be asking you why you don't have a glum face?" Casey said before turning and facing me.

"Why would I be upset? I got into the college of my choice." _And I am going with the one person I want to go with._

"Derek, did you not read the entire acceptance letter?" Casey handed Derek her acceptance letter. As he read over it, he realized what made her so upset. There was a problem with the dorms and they will not be available for the freshmen class. The students would need to provide their own housing. Derek knew that their parents would not allow them to drive 2 hours there everyday and he thought that they would not pay for 2 apartments when they could just stay home and go to the University of Ottawa.

"Don't worry Case, I'll think of something." Derek said before he walked into the kitchen. Derek knew that he wanted to go to the school of his dreams, but Casey worked her entire life to get into the best college possible for her. He decided that she deserved to go to Toronto, even if he would lose his chance.

Derek knocked on his father's bedroom door. "Hey guys, it's me. Can I talk to you?"

"What's up Derek?" Nora said, as George entered the bedroom from the bathroom. They were getting ready for bed.

"Well, I just found out that Casey and I would not be able to live on campus, there's some problem with asbestos in the dorms. So we would need to get apartments, which would probably cost as much if not more than the tuition at Ottawa. I decided that you should let Casey go to Toronto and I'll stay home and attend Ottawa so that you can save some money. I think she really deserves it."

"Derek, I think your father and I need to discuss a few things before we make any decisions. We will let you both know what we are going to do in the morning." Nora motioned for Derek to leave. After he did, she turned to her husband and said "Although that was very sweet of him, their true feelings need to finally come out to one another."

George nodded, "I know, but what can we do to help?"


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: I know this chapter is kind of short, but I think it explains some necessary things.

This chapter is from the beginning of George and Nora's relationship to right after chapter 3. So I did not italicize anything again. Hope you all think it is better than the last.

The next chapter picks up from where chapter 2 left off.

Enjoy and review!

* * *

Chapter 4: The Inevitable

Nora and George were very liberal people. They understood that things would happen that they would not be able to control. They realized this the day their significant others left them. Both were very hopeful though, and one day they fell in love again.

Before their wedding, George and Nora sat down to discuss a few things. Most things were practical, like where to live and what schools to send their children. Since George had enough room, they decided to live in his house and send Nora's girls to the schools in the area.

The last thing needed to be discussed was their eldest children. Since Edwin, Marti and Lizzie were young, they would be able to adjust to becoming a family quite easily. But they knew that their respective eldest children were not keen to the idea of gaining family members. They would never consider each other a sibling, which may eventually cause some problems.

"What are we going to do if they are attracted to one another?" George asked his wife to be.

"Well, Casey is very attractive . . ."

"And Derek chases anything in a skirt, so we may have a problem." George said cutting off Nora. "Do you think that they will begin to like each other?"

Nora contemplated this for a minute. She shrugged "Well, we really can't deny them anything, it's not like they are blood related. Casey is 15 and Derek is 16. Don't you think they are old enough to make their own decisions?"

"We can't really let them date, can we?" George thought out loud. He then shook his head, "Well, I guess we could set some ground rules, if they do begin to like each other. Hopefully we won't need to have such an uncomfortable conversation." With that the parents agreed that they would not prevent happiness from their children.

* * *

Initially, the two teens could not be farther away from liking one another. They fought and yelled and expressed their hatred any chance they got. Although Nora and George were relieved, they knew that there had to be something else there. It seemed too much like Kindergarden, where the boy would pull the pigtails of the one he liked.

They began to notice some changes in Casey and Derek's behavior. There were less fights and secret glances across the dining room table. Both Nora and George knew nothing was going on, but they sensed that there may have been hidden feelings for the other.

One night at dinner, Nora asked "What is with the two of you? I kind of miss the fighting."

"Well, Derek and I decided we were getting too old for all the fights. It has been about 6 months now. We should start acting civil." Casey explained to her mother.

"But I still hear some arguments in the morning," George chimed in.

"Casey and I decided that we love to drive the other crazy, but it was becoming very mean. So we are limiting ourselves to only 5 insults a day. This way we can be happy and kind of nice to each other at the same time." As Derek said this, Nora noticed the way he looked at Casey, with something other than brotherly love in his eyes. As Nora looked up, she noticed that George also noticed the same look.

"Yeah, and we are usually done with the insults before we get home from school. So we now actually spend some time being nice together at home." Both George and Nora saw the same look in Casey's eyes that were in Derek's. _It's too bad that they have no idea what they are missing out on – _both George and Nora thought.

* * *

Over the years, the parents noticed the feelings grow. They both wanted their children to be happy and they saw how in love they were with the other. George and Nora swore that they would let their children figure it out for themselves.

By now it has been a little less than three years that the Venturis and MacDonalds became one family. Tonight was the first night that they realized how in sync the two soon to be high school graduates were. They both applied to the same school, were responsible enough to get scholarships and they did it completely separately. Casey and Derek were completely in love, but they would never act on their feelings.

"I think it is about time that we pushed them a little." Nora said when she was sure that Derek was upstairs. "I think they would be happy with one another, but they are never going to do anything about it, being afraid of rejection. And it does not seem like the feelings are going to just disappear. Derek was so selfless, offering his chance at a great education for Casey."

"I completely agree with you Nora, but it is not like we can take them by the hands and tell them to confess their feelings."

Nora's eyes widened, knowing she had a great idea. "What if we let them both attend the University of Toronto?" The smile on her face reached both her ears.

"How are we going to afford 2 apartments?" George asked confused.

"We're not, we only have to afford one." Nora noticed George finally understand. He began to nod his head. "Maybe if they live together, completely alone, and have to work with each other to survive, they might decide to tell each other . . ."

"Their feelings and be truly happy." George finished Nora's sentence. Any normal parent would think this to be completely out of the question, that two people who had feelings towards one another could share an apartment without parental supervision. But Nora and George were not uptight parents and they knew that their children could make decisions on their own, with or without them there.

"Then it's settled, we start looking for a 2 bedroom apartment for them in the morning." George kissed his wife goodnight and both of them were very pleased with themselves.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: I did not expect this chapter to be as long as it is. I really like it though and I hope all of you will too. Let me know what you think.

This chapter takes place right after chapter 2.

Also, at the end of chapter 2, Derek asked if Casey was upset. I do not know if it is clear to everyone, but he was referring to them going to college the next day (which is today in this chapter).

Enjoy and review please!

* * *

Chapter 5: Moving Out

Casey woke up the next morning bright and early, turning her alarm off at 5:45am. She looked around her empty room and sighed, afraid that she would miss it. She knew that she would be back and probably soon, but she still was upset that she was leaving. She only lived in this house for about 3 years, but it has become her home. She grew up in this house, had her first kiss in this house, even fell in love in this house.

As Casey got up her eyes found their way to that fascinating wall. She was sure she was going to miss that wall and all it represents. She was going to miss having a wall between the two of them, being so close and so far apart at the same time.

Making her way to the bathroom, she noticed that Derek's door was open. She glanced inside to see if he was still asleep. Although Casey woke up early, she knew that they still needed a pretty early start. She was shocked to see that Derek was not in his room.

Casey knew that Derek would be up early, but she did not think he would be up before her. Almost everyday over the past 3 years she would always get the shower first, and he was always there waiting for it when she was done. She even began to finish her routine in the bathroom, putting her perfume on after her shower. Casey always hoped that he liked the way she smelled.

_Where could he be? Could he really be up this early? _ Casey entered the bathroom and turned on the water. It dawned on her that she would be showering in a new shower the next day. It would be a shower that only the two of them would be showering in. No Lizzie or Edwin or Marti. _Maybe I could join him in the shower one day, _she chuckled to herself.

* * *

After finishing his cookies the night before, Derek went to his room and set his clock for 5:30am. He wanted to be up extra early, knowing that they needed to leave at 8am to miss any traffic. He also wanted to spend a little more time with Marti.

Although Derek was getting exactly what he wanted, he was going to miss his little sister. She always held a special place in his heart. When his mother left their family, Marti was just a little girl. George was busy supporting his family that he did not have much time for such a small child. Derek was the one to wake her up and help her get ready for her babysitter. He fed her and put her to bed. She gave him a special nickname, which he gave one for her right back.

"Hey Smarti, want to come play a little before I have to leave?" Derek spoke softly as he gently shook his little sister. She was not his little Smarti anymore, she was now 7 and made that known anytime anyone said she was a little girl. But he also held a special place in her heart, so she let him get away with it.

"Morning Smerek. What do you want to do? Don't you have to leave soon?" Marti still had that sleepy look in her eyes, but it was apparent she was happy that he woke her up.

"Well, I was wondering if you wanted to go to the park across the street and swing with me on the swings for a little while." Although Derek knew his heart was completely for Casey, he knew that Marti crept her way in and held a place that would always be reserved for her.

Marti and Derek made their way out of the house without anyone knowing. They spent about half an hour swinging alone in the park. Marti told Derek she would miss him and he said that he would be home soon and that she could visit him any time she wanted.

When Casey finished her shower, she brushed her teeth, put on her deodorant and gave a light mist of her apple perfume over her body. She collected her remaining few items from the bathroom and walked across the hall to her room. Quickly getting dressed and brushing her long hair, Casey packed the remaining items into her small duffel and walked over to her window.

She saw Derek and Marti across the street. She saw the smiles on their faces and the way Derek gently pushed Marti on the swing. Casey always admired the special relationship between the two of them. She saw how he could love someone unconditionally. She wondered if he could ever love her that way. _I wonder if he is going to be this great with our kids. _The thought crossed her mind before it could register. _Why do you do this to yourself? You are not even together and you are thinking about kids with him. Little Derek/Caseys running around. _She could not help but think about what they would look like. Maybe his chocolate brown eyes and her dark hair, or her blue eyes and his reddish brown hair.

Casey did not notice that Derek and Marti left the park and entered the house. Taking one last look around her room, her eyes looked over to her bed. She wanted to bring her diary, but she decided not to, afraid she might leave it out in the open and Derek would learn her secrets. She grabbed the book from under her mattress and placed it in the back of her closet on the top shelf. Casey grabbed her duffel and entered the hallway.

Bam! Déjà vu, she slammed right into Derek. This time he caught her early, before she got close to the floor. _Damn, I can get used to this._ They both thought. Within a second, Casey stood up and found herself caught up in Derek's eyes, for what seemed like hours, but was merely a matter of seconds. Derek broke the contact.

Derek felt like he was going to fall. But this time her lips were going to catch his. He noticed himself leaning in, but he finally gained control of the situation and looked away. A few more seconds looking into her stunning blue eyes and he knew he would kiss her. He heard her mumble thanks and then saw her pass by him, towards the stairs. Derek grabbed his stuff and entered the bathroom. Unfortunately, he got back from the park a little too late and her fragrance was barely there.

After his shower and other bathroom activities, Derek made his way across the hall to his room. He got dressed and grabbed the last of his things and shoved them into his backpack. His eyes traced his room, looking for anything else that he may have forgotten to pack. Derek's eyes landed on that wall and he sighed. He was really going to miss that wall. He thought of all the nights he spent staring at it, wishing it was not there at all.

Finally breaking his gaze, he looked to his bed. He knew that he could not bring any of his drawings, afraid that Casey would one day find them. He reached under his bed and grabbed them, along with the letter from the night before. Derek put them in the back of his closet, underneath old blankets so that no one would find them. He grabbed the last of his things and left his room.

When Derek reached the stairs he smelled breakfast cooking. He knew it was really early for people to be up, but he knew that they all wanted to say goodbye to both him and Casey. The smell of pancakes brought him to the kitchen. As he opened the door, a sad look came across his face.

_I can't believe that this is going to be our last meal together for a long time. _Derek's eyes met Casey's and she smiled at him, knowing that he was thinking the same thing she was. _At least I will be eating alone with Casey more often._ Derek noticed Nora place a stack of chocolate chip pancakes next to where Casey sat, motioning for Derek to sit and eat.

Breakfast was full of laughter. Everyone was reliving past events and family occasions. This past Christmas was definitely everyone's favorite. There was a huge blizzard and they were all stuck in the house together for an entire day.

* * *

_Derek woke up freezing. Rolling over, he noticed that his clock was off. He thought that he might have blown a fuse, because he went to sleep with his stereo on. Derek dragged himself out of bed to grab a sweatshirt and to go get some food. _

_This was the third day of his winter vacation and he got the entire week off of work. Derek planned to return to his early days of slothfulness, just enjoying his vacation. It also helped that Casey got off from her job as well, so he knew that she would be around the house as well._

_Casey left her room at the same time as Derek was leaving his. She had her blanket wrapped around herself, shivering. _I wonder if he will hold me if I complain that I'm cold. _He noticed she still looked sleepy and looked like she was as cold as him. _Maybe if I explain that body heat was the best form of warmth she might let me hold her.

"_Morning Case." Derek said, thinking how gorgeous she looked when she just woke up. He noticed that she slept with her hair down the night before, and that her hair was slightly sticking out all over the place, but he absolutely loved it. Her eyes also had a half dazed look in them, like she was still dreaming._

"_Hey Derek, what time is it? My clock's not working, I think I blew a fuse or something." Casey said. _

"_I don't know, my clock is not working either." Casey stared at Derek as he spoke. She loved his messy hair in the morning, and how his eyes were always squinting, like they were allergic to the light or something._

"_Well, can you come with me to the basement so we can flip the switches? Mom and George are probably already at work and I do not want to go down there alone." Casey asked, hoping that Derek would believe her, even though she just wanted to be with him in the dark basement. _

"_Sure Case, come on." Derek started for the stairs, waiting at the top for Casey to follow. _

_The two got to the kitchen and noticed that the time on the oven was not on. They both looked at each other and moaned, knowing something they did not want to be true. They ran down the steps and reached the fuse box. Before Derek was able to open it, Casey tapped him on his shoulder. It was then that Derek heard what she was trying to get his attention for. He would know that sound anywhere. Both crept towards their parents' bedroom door and slowly opened it. George and Nora were still asleep and George was snoring like a wild beast._

_Derek reached for his father's watch on the dresser and saw that it was 10:30am. Both Nora and George were usually out of the house by 7am, so seeing them sleeping told them that it was true. The electricity was out. There was no denying it. _

"_Hey dad, wake up. It's 10:30." Derek said shaking his father out of sleep._

"_Ha ha, very funny. Why didn't my alarm go off then?" George said rolling over to see his alarm clock, which was black. "Ugh, I am going to be late for work."_

"_I do not think you need to worry about work George," Casey said from across the room. She pulled back the curtains and everyone saw what she was looking at, complete white. Although George and Nora lived in the basement, the window was still a least 3 feet off the ground and about 4 feet high. The snow was over the top of the window._

_A little while later everyone was in the kitchen. George got off his cell phone with a colleague who informed him about the storm. It had snowed heavily all night and everything in town was shut down. Plows were not able to get down the blocks, so everyone was staying inside until it was ok. "I guess this is time for some family bonding."_

_Everyone groaned as a collective. No one wanted family time; they all wanted to be with their friends. Everyone wanted this except for Derek and Casey, who were secretly ecstatic about being able to stay home with the other. _

_Since there was no electricity and everything in the refrigerator would go bad, Nora told the children that they could have ice cream for breakfast. This brought up the spirits of everyone. After stuffing themselves with ice cream, the family went to their respective rooms to get changed. However, everyone seemed to just put on more layers of pajamas on. _

"_Hey Der, can I ask you for a favor?" Derek heard Casey's voice as he pulled his sweatshirt over his head. She was standing in his doorway, leaning on the frame. "I was wondering if I can borrow a sweatshirt. Mine are too small for me to fit more than a t-shirt underneath and I'm freezing."_

_At first Derek was shocked and happy that Casey would want anything of his, but he shrugged it off as it just being cold because the heat was not working. "Sure Case." But then it dawned on him. He had not done his laundry yet and he had no more clean sweatshirts. "But I do not have any clean ones," he said pointing to his laundry basket._

"_Oh, well I guess I won't mind borrowing a dirty one, I am just so cold." Casey said trying her hardest not to sound as excited as she was. _Yes, I hope it smells like him. _Casey grabbed the sweatshirt Derek held out to her. She dropped her blanket on his bed and pulled his sweatshirt over her head. A smile crossed her faced when she smelled him in the cloth._

"_Everyone is downstairs getting ready to play a game, wanna come?" Derek said, wondering why she was so happy. _I bet it is because she is just warm now. _ Casey nodded and followed Derek downstairs, after wrapping her blanket around her body._

_When they reached the living room they noticed that everyone was already there. George and Nora set up a few candles on the table. They were both sitting in the recliner, with Nora on George's lap. They were snuggled in a blanket. Lizzie, Edwin and Marti were sitting on the couch, all under another blanket and huddled together. Casey sat down across from everyone and patted the floor next to her for Derek to sit, noticing that he was looking around for a place to sit down._

_George and Nora suggested a board game, but no one wanted to move. After a moment of silence, Edwin suggested a game of truth or dare. One after another everyone agreed. At first everyone picked dares and had to do stupid things. Edwin had to get everyone a drink, Lizzie had to grab some more candles and Nora had to make snacks for everyone. _

_Since it was Nora's turn, she turned to Casey and Derek. Noticing that Derek was slightly shivering, she asked Casey truth or dare. Casey contemplated it for a second and decided to keep the tradition going, she agreed to a dare._

"_I dare you to share your blanket with Derek, since he does not have one." Nora felt her husband nudge her, giving her a look that said 'I thought we were not going to interfere'. Derek and Casey both felt their hearts jump into their throat and they gave one another a look, but a few seconds apart. Of course, no one noticed it, except George and Nora._

_Casey lifted the blanket and allowed Derek to scoot closer to her. She felt his thigh brush against hers, sending shivers up her spine. She wanted to lean on him, but decided not to push her luck. Although Derek was excited about being close to Casey, he wanted to be closer to her. He had to use all of his will power not to place his arm around Casey, pulling her closer to him._

_Casey asked Marti, who picked truth. Her question was whether she liked Dimi, Emily's little brother. Marti turned completely red and said yes. She began to threaten everyone's life if they ever told anyone, which made everyone burst out laughing. After that, no one picked a dare. It was truth after truth after truth. They learned that George took dance lessons before the wedding, Lizzie did not like George's cooking, Nora also did not like George's cooking and Edwin had his first kiss with some girl in his science class._

_Edwin turned to Derek, who had yet to be picked. "So, Derek truth or dare?" Derek followed the rest and chose truth. Edwin raised his eyebrow and a smirk formed on his face. "Derek, did you lose your mojo?" Everyone turned to Edwin, confused about his question._

"_What does that mean?" Derek asked, just as confused as everyone._

"_Well, you haven't had a girl over in over a year. You never go out on dates. I do not think you have been to a party in the last year and a half. What happened to you man? Did you lose it or something?"_

_Derek was stunned by the observations of his little brother. He noticed everyone turn to him, waiting for an answer. "Well, I guess I was immature back then Edwin. I did not treat girls with the respect they deserve." Derek looked down to the floor, trying to avoid all of the questioning stares in his direction._

"_What about now though? I mean you have really grown up in the last 2 years, why have you not started dating?" George asked, this time Nora poking him under the blanket._

_Derek did not know how to say it without giving too much away. "I guess I decided I should not waste my time with meaningless relationships. When you find someone special you just don't care about anyone else, I guess." _And I found someone special, all I have to do is wait for Casey._ Derek still stared at the floor, not wanting to find any one's eyes._

"_Did you find anyone special yet Derek?" Edwin asked, amazed that his skirt chasing brother became a sap over a girl. He just needed to know who made him this way._

_Seeing Derek's eyes turn to Casey, Nora jumped in before he could answer, "Only one question per turn guys. Derek it's your turn to ask someone." _

_A few rounds later and it was Lizzie's turn. She turned to her older sister and asked, "Casey, why were you not very upset when you and Sam broke up a few years ago?"_

_Casey almost choked, she knew that she only went out with Sam to try and make Derek jealous, but she could not admit that. "I guess I was not upset because I never really loved him." _I loved someone else._ Derek always hoped that they really had nothing very special. He wanted to be her someone special._

_After a few more rounds, everyone got some dinner, which was anything that did not have to be cooked. After dinner, they all sat around the living room once again. They shared past stories and experiences. Everyone laughed more that day then they ever had in their entire lives. Later that night, they all decided to sleep in the living room and cuddle up to keep warm. Casey went to her room to grab a pillow and Derek ran to the bathroom. When they both got back downstairs, they looked around and saw that everyone was already asleep, in the same places as before. _

_Derek was screaming on the inside, as was Casey. He nudged her and softly said "Let's just get some sleep." He laid down on the floor and motioned for her to come lay down next to him. As she got to the floor and covered the two of them, she turned so her back was to his face. After about an hour, neither of them was asleep. She stretched a little and brushed her back against his chest. He thought she was asleep, so he placed his arm around her, pulling her in closer to him. He couldn't help himself but snuggle into her neck. Casey could not help but sigh, feeling his breath on her neck. She thought he was asleep and did not want to wake him. She snuggled a little bit closer into him and fell asleep. _

_The next morning, Derek and Casey woke up at the same time. Derek did not want to freak Casey out, so he tried to explain. "Sorry, I did not mean to hold you, I guess I was just a little cold." He removed his arm and turned away from her a little._

_Casey turned over so that she could look into Derek's eyes, "It's okay Derek, I was pretty warm last night, so I guess I should thank you." Before anything else could be said, the rest of the family began to wake up and start talking. They all noticed that the electricity was back on and they each went on about their normal activities._

* * *

After a long and fulfilling breakfast, everyone made their way towards the front door. Derek hugged everyone goodbye. He gave Edwin some brotherly advice, told Marti he would see her soon and told Lizzie to keep up the good work on her hockey team. Casey gave her sister and stepsiblings hugs, telling them she will miss them and see them all soon. The three younger children all ran up the stairs, going back to bed because it was still early for them for a Saturday.

"Well, I can't believe you're going off to college." Nora said with tears filling her eyes.

"Oh mom, don't cry. You know we will be home soon. And you can visit us anytime." Casey said, taking her mother into a hug.

Nora reached out, taking her daughter and Derek into one big hug. Although he was hugging his stepmother, Derek was caught up in the scent that he missed in the bathroom earlier. As he breathed in heavily, trying to take in the sensation of being so close to Casey, he felt Casey shutter. _I wonder if my breath on her skin made her shake._ Suddenly, George enveloped them all into a big hug. After breaking the hug, Derek and Casey said their final goodbyes.

Derek grabbed his bag and Casey's duffel and headed to his car. It was actually George's old jeep, which he gave to Derek for his seventeenth birthday after George got a minivan for the family. Derek placed the bags into the already stuffed trunk and got into the driver's side. Casey was already sitting in the passenger seat. He noticed her fidgeting with the directions in her hands. He reached out and placed his hand over hers, the touch making her head turn towards his.

"We are going to be okay, you know that right?" He said, looking into her eyes with sincerity.

When he removed his hand she felt the warmth disappear. She turned towards the window and nodded, "Yeah Derek, I know." _And I am more excited than you will ever know, _they both thought at the same time.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: I originally was not going to put lyrics in and let you readers put in what you thought fit. But I was listening to music and thought this song fit (it's Teddy Geiger's 'For you I will').

Also, I am in college and have neglected my school work to write this story and read others, not that I'm complaining. I will definitely update, but not on a daily basis that I have been. Knowing me though, I will probably continue to not do my school work and update anyways. ;) Just giving a heads up to any delays (they will not be months, just maybe a few days).

Enjoy and review. I have gotten such great reviews (thanks!), but constructive criticism is always welcome.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

* * *

Chapter 6: Moving In

The drive from their house to Toronto would take about 2 hours. Casey promised a few days earlier that she would not fall asleep, so they made a list of songs and she burned them onto a CD for the ride. Both Casey and Derek were not surprised that they had similar taste in songs. Over the years, they had become pretty close, almost like best friends. They shared stories, fears and everything. Well, almost everything, feelings about the opposite sex was never brought up. Both were afraid of finding out the other was in love with someone else.

A few minutes after leaving the driveway, there was an awkward silence in the car. Casey reached over to Derek's visor and grabbed the mixed CD out of the CD holder. They both sat quietly during the first song, singing to themselves in their heads. When the next song began a shocked Derek turned to Casey. _I do not remember agreeing on this song. I had no idea she even liked it, I really cannot believe how much we have in common. It's my all time favorite . . ._

Derek's thoughts were cut off when Casey began to speak, "Sorry, I know we did not agree on this song, but it's my all time favor- . . ."

"**Wondering the streets, in a world underneath it all  
Nothing seems to be, nothing tastes as sweet as what I can't have  
Like you and the way that you're twisting your hair round your finger  
Tonight I'm not afraid to tell you what I feel about you."**

Derek cut her off, singing the first part of the song, staring out the front window as he drove. As he sang, Casey's head shot up and stared at him. _I can't believe he likes this song . . . and he has such an amazing voice._

**"Forgive me if I st-stutter from all of the clutter in my head  
Cuz I could fall asleep in those eyes like a water bed  
Do I seem familiar, I've crossed you in hallways a thousand times, **

**No more camouflage I want to be exposed, and not be afraid to fall."**

Casey sang this other part, which made Derek stop singing and look her way. He was absolutely mesmerized by the angelic voice coming from her. He began to sing the song with her, both with huge smiles plastered on their faces the entire time.

When the song ended, Casey lowered the volume on the stereo. "I had no idea you liked that song. I thought you would have thought it was girly."

"I kind of always had a thing for that song. It just kind of stuck out to me." _It kind of always reminded me of you._

"Yeah, me too," Casey said. A small smile tugged at the sides of her face. Whenever she thought of that song, her thoughts always trailed back to Derek. It was something in the lyrics that made his face appear in her head.

The rest of the trip seemed to fly by. Derek spoke of excitement about their classes and being in a new town. But he sensed fear in Casey's voice when she would say anything about it. He assured her that they would be ok and explained that no matter what he was there for her. Smiling at him, she nodded and told him the same.

Derek and Casey continued to speak nonstop during the trip. They spoke about almost everything. There was never a period of awkward silence. Neither even noticed when the CD finished and stopped playing.

It wasn't until they turned on the block of the apartment building that they realized what was happening. _We are adults, we are going to college, out parents are letting us live on our own, and we are living together._ Casey felt her heart begin to race as Derek parked the car, unaware that his own heart was beating just as fast as hers. They were both excited to be living on their own, especially with each other. He turned off the car, popped the trunk and grabbed a few things. Casey reached for a few things as well and followed him into the building.

They reached apartment 107, at the end of the hall on the first floor. Derek put the things in his hands down and reached into his pocket for the key. After unlocking the door, he pushed it open for Casey to enter, following her inside.

"Home sweet home," they both said simultaneously. This caused the two to laugh and look at each other. _Oh no, there are her stunning eyes again. How the hell did I think I was going to live with her without letting my feelings out? _Derek tore his eyes away from hers to scan the apartment.

Casey had already started to look around the place, mentally kicking herself. She felt herself moving towards Derek when he was looking at her. _That would be just great, ruin everything before you are even moved in. Smart Case, real smart. But why did he have to have such amazing eyes._

The apartment was small but quaint and furnished. There was a small living area with a couch for two. _Good for snuggling_, they both thought to themselves. The kitchen was a good size for the two of them, with a small table and two chairs. Derek entered the bathroom and pulled back the shower curtain. _Maybe if we wake up late we can shower together,_ a faint smirk crossed his lips.

Derek walked into the hall to see Casey standing between two doors on opposite sides of the hall. They both inwardly sighed. There would not be a wall between the two of them, but an entire hallway. Derek came up behind Casey and asked which one she wanted.

"I don't really care, they are exactly the same. Bed, dresser, desk, nothing too spectacular." They flipped a coin, Derek took the one on the right and Casey took the one on the left.

A few trips to and from the car and everything was inside the apartment. They began unpacking, saying almost nothing to one another. The silence was not as awkward as either of them thought it was, it was actually relaxing. They decided to set up their respective bedrooms first. Casey was done before Derek, but it had still taken her a few hours. When she finished she strolled across the hall and peered into Derek's room. He was almost done, but he was still setting up his computer.

"I'm going to start on the kitchen, ok?" Derek nodded and continued plugging wires into specific places.

Derek finished with his room and walked into the living room. There was an opening in the wall that gave a view of the kitchen. He already saw a picture of their family sitting on the shelf. It was a picture of George and Nora's wedding. He couldn't help but smile at the glares on his and Casey's face. _Man, I have come a long way since that day._ He glanced up to see Casey putting glasses and plates in the cupboards. _Hopefully she has too._

Derek began giving things homes in the living room. He placed the tv on a small stand and opened a box containing throw pillows, tossing them on the couch. He draped a blanket that he knew was Casey's favorite over the back, knowing that she liked to wrap herself up when she watched tv.

Casey couldn't help but stare at Derek as he arranged up their small living room. It was set up nothing like it was at their parents house, but she did not mind. She was actually happy that he did it differently. It was their home and she was happy that she was comfortable with the way it was coming out.

She turned back and began to open the last box labeled kitchen. It contained the pots and pans that they would be using. She tried to place them on the top shelf of one of the cabinets, but couldn't quite reach. Noticing Casey on her tiptoes and still not reaching, Derek entered the kitchen. He looked around and noticed it was different than his parents' house. Things were in set up differently and he liked it. He was pleased that he was comfortable with where Casey was placing everything.

"Case, you need help with that?" Derek said walking towards her. He grabbed the pots out of her hand and placed them on the shelf with ease. He was a good six inches taller than her.

"Well, we can't all be 12 feet tall," she said rolling her eyes in a playful manner.

"I'm 6'2" and you know it," he said in her same tone. "I going to put a few things in the bathroom, then put some hockey stuff away." Derek left the room quickly, having the sudden urge to kiss Casey's forehead.

About an hour later Casey was finished with the last of the boxes. She sat on the couch to relax and looked over at the clock Derek hung on the wall. She smiled, thinking that he placed it in a great spot, where you can see it from almost anywhere in the apartment.

"Hey Derek."

"Yeah," she heard him say from his bedroom.

"Are you hungry? It's almost 5:30." She said, they had not eaten since breakfast.

Derek entered the living room and sat down next to Casey on the couch. "I'm starving, do you want to go out to eat since we have nothing here? Then we can go shopping for food and stuff."

"Alright, let's get going." Casey said. "But promise you will let me pick the place."

"Case, you can pick anything you want," Derek said in a teasing tone. _And I sure hope you pick me._


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: I had this chapter in mind since I started the story and it came out the way I wanted it to. I hope you all like it.

In the next chapter or 2 you will see a little but more of the realization of feelings and such. I am really looking forward to one that I am going to call "The Game" (don't know if it's the next one or the one after yet).

Thanks for all the great reviews. They make me want to write more, instead of doing school work.

Enjoy and review please!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

* * *

Chapter 7: Date Night and "We're even"

Casey and Derek walked into a small diner and headed towards a booth in the back. He let Casey pick the restaurant, but they both know that she picked the first one they saw, because they were both so hungry. Sliding into opposite sides of the booth, Derek passes Casey a menu from the end of the table. By the time the waitress came to take their orders, they knew what they wanted. Casey ordered a cheeseburger and fries, with a coke. Derek just nodded to the waitress and said he would have the same.

Waiting for their food, they looked around the diner. It was small but very charming. It had an old fashioned feel to it, with small jukeboxes on the tables, so people could enjoy the music they wanted to listen to while they ate. Casey flipped through the songs, which were mostly from the '80s and then just hit the random button.

During the meal there was a lot of conversation. It went from what classes they were taking to hockey season beginning the next weekend to what they needed from the supermarket. Throughout the meal, their waitress kept coming up to them, making sure the meal was ok and refilling their drinks.

"So Casey . . ." Derek began, not knowing how to continue.

"Yeah Derek . . ." Casey said, smirking at him. She always found it funny and little cute when he was flustered for words, hoping that she was the one making him fluster.

"Well, you know that I am not the best cook in the world." Derek said as he looked down at his food.

"What are you talking about? You make the best toast I have ever had, and your bowls of cereal are to die for." Although Casey tried to act serious, she could not help but laugh at herself.

"Ok ok, enough with the 'Let's pick on Derek because he can't cook.'" He waited for her to stop laughing before he began again, "I always plan on helping you with the cooking, but I was kind of thinking that you could teach me how to cook. I would feel bad if you had to cook for me every night." _Even though I wouldn't mind eating your cooking. _

_Hmm, spending more time with Derek._ "Only if you promise to cook me one meal a week by yourself, so I can taste your progress." Casey replied with a grin on her face.

Derek agreed, but then a thought crossed his mind. "Only if we can go out to eat once a week, to give ourselves a break from cooking. We can even come here, the food isn't half bad and it's kind of cheap." _And a little dark and romantic._

"And then after we can rent a movie?" _Where we can cuddle on the couch to watch it. _Casey had to force her face from forming a huge smile as Derek nodded his head in approval.

"Every Saturday night then," Derek said as he shook Casey's hand to seal the deal.

_Date night every Saturday,_ they both thought simultaneously.

Their waitress came by again to see if they needed anything else.

"Der, can we please get some ice cream?" Casey said in a baby voice, making her lower lip pout out.

_Can she be any more perfect? Like I can even say no to that face._ Derek gave her a sly look, acting like he was thinking. He turned to the waitress, "Can we please get vanilla ice cream with hot fudge. No cherry though, she's allergic." Casey was a little shocked that he knew what she wanted, but brushed it out of her mind, thinking he just picked it up from living with her for so long.

"Sorry hun, but we ran out of vanilla earlier today. Anything else?" Looking over at Casey's upset face, Derek said no and politely asked for the check. The waitress handed it to him and told him he can pay at the counter. Before leaving she turned to Casey, "You've got a great guy there, don't let him get away."

Before Casey or Derek could protest to the waitress, she turned around and left. They both sat there in complete shock. Without realizing it, they were both blushing and as their eyes met, they just blushed more.

* * *

Derek and Casey got to the supermarket around 7:30. They knew they needed to get a lot of stuff, so they decided to take the store aisle by aisle. They started in the back by the dairy section. The wagon contained things from bathroom tissue and napkins to poptarts and orange juice. They made their way through the aisles, asking each other what the other would prefer.

They reached the beauty care aisle and Casey began scanning the body washes, thinking she wanted to try a new kind. Derek went a little further into the aisle to grab his shampoo. When Casey made her decision, she turned towards the wagon to see Derek drop his shampoo in, along with a bottle of her own.

_He knows my shampoo? I didn't think he paid any attention to that._ She simply smiled at him when he asked if she was ok. He said she had a weird but happy look on her face. He secretly loved when she zoned out like that, thinking of the way she was in the kitchen the night before, she looked so innocent. They grabbed the other bathroom necessities, such as toothpaste and mouthwash, and made their way to the end of the aisle.

Looking into the wagon, Casey realized they forgot something. "Hey Derek, do you think you can run back and grab some milk? We forgot it and I don't feel like eating dry cereal in the morning."

"Sure thing," he said before turning to leave.

"I'll meet you in the next aisle. I'm going to grab some band aids and aspirin, seeing as you have a game this Friday." She chuckled and let him go.

_I wonder if she said that out of care for me or if she is afraid I'm going to bleed all over the apartment, _Derek thought as he walked to the back of the store and grabbed some milk. _Well, she would make a pretty hot nurse, tending to his cuts and bruises. _ He decided to go down one of the frozen aisles before making his way back to the front of the store. His eyes scanned the case before landing on what he was looking for, Häagen-Daz vanilla with chcoclate fudge ice cream, Casey's favorite.

As Derek turned down the aisle that Casey was on his heart caught in his throat. _What is she doing? We have been here for less than an hour and she already has a guy on her side. _Derek saw some guy standing to Casey's right, blatantly flirting with her, even though he only saw their backs. But he was angry, angry that she was with a guy and that he was jealous. _She is not your girlfriend. She could date people. She is allowed to have a friendly conversation. _Derek noticed as the guy leaned in, whispering into Casey's ear. He saw how tense Casey got, he knew she felt uncomfortable.

Doing the only thing he could think of, Derek grabbed something from the shelf near him and made his way towards them. He placed himself right between the two and dropped the milk, ice cream and third item into the cart, making sure the last item was on the top and able to be seen.

Placing his hand on the small of Casey's back, he leaned into her and kissed her on the cheek. "Hey, I thought we would try these this time, to see how you like them," making sure he was loud enough for the guy to hear him.

Looking at the box of 'for her pleasure' condoms in the wagon and then at the look in his eyes, Casey knew exactly what Derek was doing. She thanked him with her eyes and leaned into him for a hug. Placing a kiss on his neck for the guy to see, she said "Thanks babe, I can't wait."

Derek instantly melted when her soft lips hit his bare skin. He wrapped his arms around her waist and inhaled her scent. Her hair moved a little into his face and her smell magnified. _Mmm, coconuts, we should definitely pick up some fruit._

Casey closed her eyes when she made contact with his neck. She fought the urge to continue kissing and just relished in the warmth coming from him. She knew the instant they would break contact that she would be cold.

Neither of them noticed the angry guy grunt and walk away.

After what seemed like hours but was merely a few seconds they heard someone clear their throat. They reluctantly let go of one another and faced a little old lady, who had a smile on her face. She reached between the two and grabbed a bottle of cold medicine. As she walked away they could hear her say something about young love. Again, they both blushed and looked into the other's eyes.

Grabbing for the box, Derek took the condoms and placed them on a nearby shelf. Casey noticed a look of embarrassment on his face. "Don't be embarrassed, it was really nice of you. Thank you for saving me."

Smiling up at her, his only response was "You owe me you know."

She smirked thinking _anything you want you can have._

When they got home and put everything away, Derek began to walk towards his room. Casey called out his name, making him turn to face her.

"Where do you think you are going? It's Saturday, we still have a movie to watch." She turned towards their small DVD collection and began looking through them. She was unaware of the huge grin across Derek's face. _What is the most romantic movie here? Ahah! _She grabbed 'The Notebook" and popped it into the DVD player.

Derek secretly loved this movie. It was another thing that reminded him of Casey. The characters were always fighting, but it was always so passionate. Although they did not fight anymore, they still had their playful banter and Casey was still a bit feisty when she wanted to be, which made him fall in love all over again.

As he sat down on the couch next to a wrapped up Casey, he watched her begin to eat her ice cream. "Well, if I'm going to watch this movie, then I'm eating some of your ice cream." With that, he snatched the spoon from her hand and placed it in his mouth, delighted in the fact that it was in her mouth only a few seconds before. _Maybe I could just eat the ice cream right out of her mouth, explaining that I did not want to dirty anymore dishes. _She laughed and grabbed the spoon back, occasionally sharing the ice cream with him, of course from the same spoon.

* * *

_I cannot believe it is the first day of classes and I am already late. _His eyes scanned the lecture hall and he finally saw Casey sitting a few rows ahead of him, with her bag in a seat to her right. _I hope she is saving that seat for me._

This was world history, the only class that they had together. Casey saw that the class was beginning to start so she looked around the room, searching for Derek. She saw him heading towards her and she removed her bag from the seat to her right. _I was hoping he would sit next to me._

As he sat down, he mouthed a thanks. _I do not think I have ever seen lips so perfect before in my entire life. They look so plump and kissable. Maybe I could just run my lips over his, telling him I was killing a bug. _

Casey was ripped from her thoughts when she heard him sigh annoyingly. _Did he catch me staring at his lips?_ She noticed him tear a sheet of paper from his notebook and begin to write something that did not resemble history notes.

**Look over your left shoulder. But don't make it obvious. **

Casey did and saw an annoying blond a few seats away, blowing kisses in their direction. As she turned she saw Derek writing something else on the piece of paper.

**See the blond, the one that reminds you of that slut Summer from high school. Well, she is in my drawing class right before this. She came over to me after and started flirting, which is why I was late - by the way, thanks for saving me a seat :). I tried to tell her I was not interested, but that seemed to piss her off. She kept at it and I couldn't take her idiotic behavior anymore, I really think she only has 3 brain cells. Anyway, I just blurt out the first thing that came to me . . . I told her I have a girlfriend.**

Casey's heart skipped a beat. Although she knew he didn't have a girlfriend, she kind of hoped he thought of her when he said that, if only to get the girl to stop annoying him.

**She did not believe me though, saying I was lying. I just left her standing there as I head to this class, not confirming that I did not have a girlfriend. I had no idea I had another class with her. Now she will probably try and sit next to us from now on.**

Casey's eyes ran over the rest of the note. She had no idea that Derek planned on sitting with her everyday. But she wasn't going to complain.

Thinking quickly, she reached her left hand over her lap and captured Derek's left hand in her own, intertwining their fingers, setting the hands in her lap. She could not use her right hand, because she was a righty, as was he. Normally, someone would think it would feel uncomfortable, it being 2 left hands, but it felt just right to both of them. She looked up into his confused eyes, leaned over and kissed him on the cheek, making sure the blond was able to see the whole thing. Casey leaned over and wrote on the paper . . .

**We're even. ;)**

They sat through the whole class holding hands, both with their hearts racing and minds full of thoughts. They were barely able to take notes the entire time, secretly thanking the professor for putting his notes online.


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: Not much to say. I really like the way this chapter turned out. Hope you all do as well.

Enjoy and review! Let me know what you think

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

* * *

Chapter 8: The Game

Today was the first Friday of Casey and Derek's college career and tonight was Derek's first hockey game. In high school Derek was the 'Hockey God', the captain of his team, perfect in every game. But here, he was just a lowly freshman on the varsity team, which only consisted of seniors. Not that he didn't have confidence in himself, part of his scholarship came from his skills in hockey, he was just nervous that he was not going to be what everyone expected of him.

Casey reached for the knob to their apartment when she heard Derek talking to someone. She held her hand over her mouth as she strained to listen through the front door. _Who is he talking to? Does he have a girl in there? What are they talking about?_ All that filled Casey's mind was questions. She did not want to interrupt anything so she decided to just listen in. When she heard it was a one sided conversation she sighed, glad that he wasn't with anyone and was just on the phone.

"I know . . . but it's my first game . . . I guess I just expected you guys to be there . . . I'm just so used to having some fans . . . No, I can't ask her . . . She hasn't been to a game since I called her bad luck . . ."

With that Casey chuckled a bit. During the first few months of living in the Venturi/MacDonald household, she went to a few games with the family. After a rough loss, Derek blamed her.

"_Why the hell did you have to come? It's not like anyone on the team even knows who you are and I don't even like you." Derek screamed as he walked into the house._

"_I didn't even want to go. Mom and George forced me, saying we needed to bond as a family." She screamed, glaring at him from the other side of the couch._

"_You are not my family!" Derek said walking around the couch._

"_Was that supposed to hurt me Derek? I will never consider you family. I will never consider you anything more than what you are, nothing!" Casey said, matching his moves and coming face to face with him. _

_Their argument was heated and insults were flying back and forth. Finally, Derek said "It was your fault that we lost anyway. You're like a bad luck charm that won't go away."_

_Casey got so angry with him that she slapped him across the face, catching him off guard and making him fly onto the couch. "I will NEVER go to one of your stupid hockey games again." _

_After a few months passed and her feelings began to grow, she would secretly go to his games. She bought a blond wig and huge sun glasses and would always sit in the back. She had never missed a game in 2 years._

Hearing Derek groan and close his cell phone, Casey walked into their apartment. She acted like she heard nothing and continued about her normal activities. She hoped that he would ask her to his game, but he only made small talk, asking about her first campus newspaper meeting.

A little while later in his room, Derek was stressing about the game that was later on that night. During practice earlier in the week he noticed that there was a group of fans watching. They chanted one of his teammates name and he realized that it was not high school anymore. He was no longer Derek the 'Hockey God', he had not gained a name for himself here yet, he was just another player on the team.

He was starting in tonight's game, but he knew he would not have a single fan in the arena. Fans were always his motivation in high school. Hearing his name chanted and the feet stomping in the stands always gave him what he needed to play his best. Earlier he had called his dad, hoping he would show up with his family to support him, but Derek was disappointed to find out that they would not make it, they had other obligations.

_I can't ask her, she would definitely tell me no. After I screamed at her all those years ago . . . it wasn't even her fault._ Derek was having a conversation with himself while he was getting ready to leave for the game. _The stupid captain of that other team checked Tom so hard that he was out for the rest of the game. We were so distracted . . . I should have never blamed her. _

Derek heard music playing from the other room. After grabbing his hockey bag, he made his way out of his room. As he stood in the living room, he saw Casey humming to herself in the kitchen. She was sitting at the table, reading an article that was assigned to her during her meeting. _Just ask her. 'Casey, would you mind coming to my game tonight?'_

"Hey Casey, I'm heading to my game. I'll see you tonight." _Chicken!_

Nodding without looking up, Casey said "Good luck."

Hearing the front door shut, Casey jumped up and ran to her room. She had planned on attending Derek's game, even if he did not ask her. _I can't break tradition. _Casey rummaged through her closet for a jacket, knowing how cold it was in the arena.

When Casey finally arrived at Derek's game, she decided to sit in the back because she didn't have her wig and sunglasses. She sat down in the last row, right behind Derek's team's box. When the game started, she was pleased to see Derek on the ice. She had seen him play so many times, she knew how amazing he was at the sport.

Within a few minutes she knew something was wrong. It was weird to be watching Derek play and hear someone else's name from the crowd. She saw how it affected Derek's game, she knew he was out of his element. He was playing like he never played the game before. Suddenly, Derek was checked into the glass. Casey stood, afraid he was hurt, reminding her of the time at one of his high school games.

* * *

_Casey waited for everyone to leave for Derek's game. It was the end of their junior year and Casey had liked Derek for about a little over a year now. She went into her room and opened her closet. Reaching on the top shelf, she grabbed the shoebox. Pulling her hair up, she placed the blond wig onto her head and sunglasses over her face. Grabbing a jacket, she ran to the bus stop._

_Taking her normal seat, all the way on the top, behind Derek's team's box, she looked around for her family. She spotted a small girl holding up a huge sign that read "Go Smerek" in the front row. Smiling, Casey sat back to watch the game begin._

_Casey was mesmerized with Derek's gracefulness and brut strength on the ice. She knew he was strong, from all of the arguments that ended with the two of them rolling on the floor, but she was always shocked with the way Derek made his presence known on the ice. _

_As the game progressed and Derek's team scored time after time, the stands began to shake. All you could hear in arena was "DEREK! DEREK!" Casey saw how he fed off of his fans. When they called for him, he skated a little faster and checked a little harder. It was as if he was playing for them._

_She would always wince when she saw him get knocked down or pushed to the side. She feared he would get really hurt. As she watched only him, she didn't notice the guy coming up behind him. Obviously neither did Derek, because he was slammed into the boards, falling to the ground. _

_The entire arena grew quiet, waiting for their beloved "Hockey God" to get up from the ice. Without thinking, Casey went flying down the steps towards the rink, screaming Derek's name. She was terrified he was hurt. When she reached the entrance to the rink, she noticed him getting up. _Shit, I can't let him see me._ Casey ran towards the doors and out of the arena. _

_She had decided to walk home, since the bus would have taken too long to get to the arena and she did not want anyone to see her in the area. Casey knew that Derek was fine, but she was still worried about him. He could one day seriously get hurt. _

_A car's horn brought her back to reality. Casey turned to see Derek in his jeep, pulled up next to her. _Boy am I happy I took off my wig._ Casey walked over to the car, leaning into the open window._

"_Want a ride?" Derek asked. It was obvious he was sad. She heard it in his voice, saw it in his eyes. _

"_Thanks." Casey said, getting in and buckling her seat belt._

_They drove in complete silence for a while. She saw him pass their block, but she didn't ask where they were going. She desperately wanted to ask how he was feeling, if his side hurt, but she did not want to blow her cover. _

_After about 15 minutes of complete silence, Derek glanced at Casey and asked, "Where were you coming from?"_

"_Mall," Casey quickly replied. The school and mall were in the same direction from their house, so she figured he wouldn't think she was lying. _

_Another 5 minutes passed without a word said between them. It finally dawned on Casey that Derek's game would not be ending for about another hour. _Why is he here? Did he get hurt badly enough that he couldn't play for the rest of the game?

_As if reading her mind, "I got hurt in today's game. Some guy on the other team checked me and knocked me out for a minute or 2." Derek sighed. "My side got scrapped pretty badly on the ice and coach said I had to sit out."_

"_Derek, why did you leave? You could have still cheered for your team or showed moral support." _

"_I just had to get out of there. The crowd kept cheering for me, making me want to skate, but my side was in pretty bad shape. I just wanted to get out of there. I didn't say anything to anyone, I just left." Derek pulled the car into a parking lot of a diner. "Let's get something to eat."_

_Derek got out of the car and walked over to the front doors of the diner. He waited for Casey to make her way over to him before he held the door open for her. She saw in his face that something else was wrong, but she didn't want to push him. _

_Sliding into the booth, Derek winced when his side hit the wall. Casey immediately got up and walked over to the counter. He noticed her come back with a small box in her hand._

"_Get up please." She asked Derek, looking into his eyes._

_Derek got up and Casey motioned for him to get in on the other side. As he slid in, Casey slid in next to him, so that his bad side was now facing her. She gently lifted his shirt up, seeing the scraps on his side. She opened the first aid kit she got from the elder women at the counter, taking out an antiseptic wipe. She gently wiped the area, bandaging it carefully, trying not to hurt him. _

_Casey got up and gave the box back to the women at the counter. When she walked back to the table, she noticed Derek speaking to the waitress. As she sat down, the waitress walked away. _

"_I ordered an ice cream sundae, I figured we could share."_

_Casey just smiled back and looked out the window. As they ate, they spoke about random things, nothing of too much importance. They both shared a few laughs, and enjoyed their time spent together. _

_On their way back to the house, Derek started the conversation. "I had fun, thanks."_

"_No need to thank me, you were the one who brought me there."_

"_Well, thanks for keeping me company. And thanks for being my nurse."_

_After a moment, Casey turned to him and said "anytime Derek, anytime."_

_When they pulled into the driveway of their parents' home, Derek turned off the car but made no attempt to leave. Finally, he turned to Casey and asked "Do you think I'm nothing?"_

_Casey was completely shocked. _You couldn't be more wrong. I think you're amazing and special and so far from nothing. _Although so much was going through her mind, she couldn't bring herself to say anything fast enough._

_Before Casey could respond Derek started talking again, "I'll take your silence as a yes."_

_Casey sighed, "I didn't say anything because I was shocked that you thought I thought that about you. And no, I do not think you are nothing. You are really something Derek, and it's definitely not nothing."_

_With that, Derek gave Casey a hug and went to leave the car. She put a hand on his shoulder, making him stop._

"_Why do you think you are nothing?"_

_Thinking for a moment, Derek turned to face Casey, looking right into her eyes. "I guess I was just thinking, that if I ever got really hurt and couldn't play hockey, I wouldn't be anything. I would have nothing going for me. My fans love Derek Venturi, the 'Hockey God', but could they love just Derek Venturi?"_

"_You have so much more going for you than hockey. You have your grades, which you picked up so fast it's incredible. You also have your hidden talent as an artist. That drawing of you and Marti is amazing. People are stupid if they can't see past your hockey." Almost as soon as she said all that she mentally kicked herself. _Great way to freak him out and show your true feelings. _She thought that he would get weird and know she liked him and would never speak to her again._

_Casey felt strong arms wrap around her. Derek held on to Casey for just a moment, whispering thanks into her ear, before leaving the car. Casey followed him into the house and up the stairs. At first, she headed towards her room, but she heard Derek call her name._

_She walked over to his room and leaned on his door frame. He pat the bed next to him, telling her to sit down. "Casey, do you think we could stop?" After a moment of silence, Casey's mind was going crazy. _Stop what? Stop talking? Stop being nice? _"I want to stop fighting with you. I would really like to have you as a friend," he said._

_Casey was relieved. "I would like to be your friend Derek. But, I'm not saying that I am not sometimes furious with you and won't want to yell sometimes, but I don't want you to think I mean anything that I say." She looked up and found his eyes with hers. "However, I want you to know that I meant everything I said before in the car. And I'll be here for you when you need to talk to someone . . . someone that can see you more than what your friends see you as."_

"_Thanks Case. And ditto." Derek smiled at her as she got up and left his room.

* * *

_

Staring down at the rink, Casey saw Derek get up. She saw him glide across the ice, with no motivation at all. She felt bad for him, knowing that he thought he didn't have a single fan or friend in the arena. _I really hope he knows he is more than hockey._

Without thinking, Casey grabbed a notebook from her bag and scribbled something on sheet of paper. She ran down the steps and reached the glass boards, right behind Derek's team's box. She held up the piece of paper against the glass, so Derek can see what she wrote.

Derek looked up and scanned the crowd. Everyone was chanting his teammate's name. He felt like skating over to the coach and asking to be replaced. As he got closer to the box, he looked up. He saw Casey standing there, with a smile on her face and a piece of paper held up to the glass. When he got close enough he read he note, bringing a smile to his face.

**DEREK! DEREK!**

Casey stood there for the rest of the game. She watched Derek play harder than he had ever played before. He scored 3 of the 6 goals his team got, with his last winning the game. She was glad to help him in his time of need, but she couldn't help what wonder if he played so well because of having a fan, or if it was because the fan was her. She was secretly hoping it was because of her.

After the game, Derek entered the locker room to shower and change. During his shower all he could think about was Casey. _Why would she come? Did she hear me on the phone with my father? She has to be the most amazing person in the world. Why can't I just tell her that? _After his shower, Derek left the building, heading towards his car. When he got close enough, he noticed Casey leaning on his car, with the note still in her hand.

Walking up to her, a genuine smile crossed his lips. "Thanks for being my fan Case."

Casey chuckled. "Don't thank me yet, I still have to be a nurse to that gash on your forehead. And you won't be thanking me when it stings."

"Just take the appreciation." He said sternly, but she saw the sincerity in his eyes. "It really meant a lot that you came."

"Come on," Casey said, playfully tugging at his arm. "Let's get you home and clean you up."

_Hmm, going home with my nurse Casey, _Derek thought driving to their apartment, sneaking glances at her the whole way._ What could be better?_


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: This turned out to be longer than expected. But I like it, and hope you all do too!

Whoever decides to review, I need some help. Can you suggest romantic movies? I need one (for a later chapter) and am leaning towards 'Romeo and Juliet', but I really don't want it to be a cliché. This is in no attempt to get more reviews than I already am, I'm not a review grubber. Just if you decide to review please think of movies.

Enjoy and review (not begging, just what I write – but I LOVE all the ones I get. Thanks!)

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

* * *

Chapter 9: Thanks

Derek paced his room for hours after his hockey game. He was so surprised that Casey came to support him, he never thought that she would ever go to one of his games again. _Why would she go? I made her feel like shit all those years ago. _But despite whatever her reasoning was, he was glad that she went. She brightened his day, made his game. He felt a rush of energy when he saw her standing there, being his fan. He felt himself play differently, like her eyes watching him gave him power and confidence that he never had before.

He wanted to do something special for her, wanting to show his appreciation. _Maybe I will just let it slip, just a little. I'll let it slip how amazing she is and how I am so lucky to be around her. Maybe I'll let it slip how much I love her._ It finally dawned on him, he knew what to do to surprise her. Derek reached over and set his alarm for 7:30, laying down to sleep with a smile across his face.

Derek woke up the next morning, knowing that Casey would be up by 9, even though it was a Saturday. She had asked him if he wanted to go with her to the library because she had to start her first article for the school paper and her creative writing assignment. He had initially agreed to go with her, since he had to hand in a drawing by Tuesday, which he did not start it yet. However, he now knew he couldn't go, he had to carry out his surprise.

Making his way to the bathroom, Derek opened the door and a frown formed on his face. _I guess no coconuts this morning. _After getting dressed, Derek made his way into the kitchen. Keeping his eyes on the hallway to make sure that Casey wouldn't hear him, he took out his cell phone. Although it was still rather earlier for a Saturday, he knew that Nora would be up.

"Hey Nora, you busy?"

"Not at all Derek, how are you and Casey doing?" Nora asked, hoping everything was fine between the two, maybe a little bit more than just fine.

"Everything is good, but I was wondering if you could help me out with something." Derek said trying to make sure his voice was not too loud. After a short response from Nora, Derek continued, trying to rush before Casey would wake up. "Well, I was wondering if you can tell me how to make your chicken parmesan. I wanted to make it tonight as a surprise."

_Who is he cooking for? Is it for a girl? I can't believe that he has liked Casey for so long and now that he is living with her he decides to date someone else. _ "Sure, but who may I ask is this for?" Nora asked, definitely wanting answers.

"Well . . . it's for Casey. See, last night was my first hockey game and I was feeling bad because I didn't have any fans and then she showed up and was really sweet and made me this sign and helped me play my best and I really want to thank her by making her favorite meal and . . ." _SHUT UP! You are rambling and Nora is definitely going to suspect something._ Before Derek could continue and try to explain why he spit everything out in one breath, Nora interrupted him.

"Derek, it's ok. Calm down. Do you have a pen and piece of paper so that you can write down the list?" Nora sighed with relief. _I can't believe he knows her favorite meal. _She was rooting for Derek and Casey for so long, she was glad that one of them was at least making an effort.

Derek grabbed a pad and pen that was on the counter, jotting down everything that Nora told him he needed. He had told her that he really wanted to try and make the sauce from scratch, not wanting to feed her something from a jar. After writing down the ingredients needed, Nora told him that she would email him the recipe for the sauce in a little while, along with the directions to prepare everything.

"Thanks so much Nora. Talk to you soon."

"No problem, and good luck." _With everything_ she thought.

After hanging up the phone with his stepmother, Derek ripped the top sheet of the pad and put it in his pocket. He quickly wrote a note for Casey, dropping his car keys on the pad. He grabbed his jacket and walked out the front door on his way to the supermarket.

As he entered the supermarket Derek glanced down at his watch, noticing it was 8:30am. He knew had about an hour before he could head home, knowing that she would be gone by about 9:30. That was the reason why he was letting her take his car, so he would know if she left yet.

Walking through the aisles, he got everything that Nora told him to get. He grabbed some fresh tomatoes, chicken, seasonings, everything that was needed for Casey's favorite meal. He couldn't wait to show his appreciation for Casey. _Maybe she'll think it's romantic._

Derek made his way throughout the store, picking up all the supplies needed and some other items needed for the apartment. As he was making his way up to the front, he found his way back to the produce section. He decided he also wanted to make Casey desert. He grabbed bananas, strawberries and dipping chocolate.

As he was about to make his way to the register, he stopped in front of the flowers. Looking over them, he began to laugh. He looked past the roses and grabbed a bunch of tulips, the ones that are two-toned, white as the main part of the petal, with red tips.

* * *

_Derek knew that Sam liked Casey from the first time they met, but something inside him told him to not let them date. At the time, Derek had no idea why he would care so much. So, he began to try to talk Sam out of dating Casey, making up male codes and unwritten rules. Within 3 months of the MacDonalds moving into the Venturi household, Casey and Sam started dating._

_It drove Derek completely insane. He wanted to attack Sam every time he saw him with Casey. At first, Derek told himself that he was being overly protective of Casey, as if she was a sister. About three months of trying to convince himself of this, six months into the MacDonalds and Venturis becoming one big happy family, he knew he was only lying to himself. He didn't consider Casey a sister, and he didn't think he ever would. _What the hell is wrong with me then?

_Derek was frustrated all the time, which made him angrier with Casey. He couldn't comprehend why he was so jealous of their relationship. Derek always thought he was not one for relationships, they were for those in love. And Derek was not in love, he usually was not in like either. Casey was just an easy target to get his aggravation out. He could yell and scream and insult and no one would think anything was new._

_The day Derek realized that he actually grew a heart and began to like someone, was the day that Casey broke up with Sam. Derek came home from school that Friday around 3:30 and saw a note on the counter saying that his father and Nora took the kids to dinner and a movie. He didn't see anything in the note about Casey, and he didn't hear her in the house, so he assumed she was out with Sam. He went to the living room to watch some tv before his date would show up at around 7pm._

_At about 4:30, someone rang the doorbell. Derek saw Sam standing there, with a dozen red roses in his hand. He looked like he had been crying, but Derek dismissed it._

"_Hey Sammy, you shouldn't have, but I love roses! What's up?"_

_Sam looked a little upset, but he hesitated, not wanting to go into it. "Nothing man, is Casey here?"_

_Derek's eyebrow raised, a little confused because he had been home for about an hour and didn't hear anything in the house. Not that he had really been paying any attention though, there was a hockey game on tv. "I don't think so, I haven't heard or seen her since I got home. I thought she would be with you. But maybe she's with Emily."_

"_Umm, well when you see her, can you give her these for me?" Sam said, holding the flowers in front of him. Derek grabbed the flowers and Sam just turned around and left, no reply. Shrugging it off, Derek went back to watching tv, placing the flowers down on the couch. _

_A little while later he heard a big bang from the upstairs bathroom. Rushing up the stairs, Derek opened the bathroom door. His first instinct was that Marti was playing around and got hurt, he completely forgot about the note he read a little over an hour ago._

_Walking into the bathroom, he noticed Casey on the floor leaning against the side of the tub. His eyes trailed up her legs, across the towel wrapped around her body, over the top of her chest not covered by the towel . . . _Damn she's . . . _but all thought left his mind when his eyes stopped on her eyes. He had never seen them like that before. He always knew they were blue, but now it seemed like they were jewels, large orbs of sapphire._

_Derek almost had to smack himself so that he could stop looking into her eyes. He didn't know what to do, how to think, it was like he was lost in them. He hadn't noticed the same look in her own eyes, the same feeling of completely losing yourself in someone else's gaze. Finally coming to his senses, Derek noticed that Casey began to rub her back and that her ankle was swelling._

_Derek rushed over to her, which snapped Casey out of her daze. "Derek! Get out of here!" Casey tried to stand, but the pain in her ankle made her fall back down, hitting her back against the tub again. _

"_I was just trying to help! You can't even stand up!" Derek screamed at her. He was so infuriated that she was not accepting his help._

_Trying once more to stand, but falling once again, Casey began to cry. At first, all Derek could do was stare. He saw her cry before, he even made her cry before. But there was something different now. He couldn't bare to tears fall from her perfect eyes. _

_Derek sat down on the floor next to her and began to rub her back. He noticed that she hit it hard and there was a small bump forming, which would definitely form a bruise. _What am I doing? This is Casey. I don't care about Casey! _Derek couldn't stop himself though. He sat there with her, on the wet floor, rubbing her back until she stopped crying._

_Casey finally looked up at him and smiled. He felt his heart start to race a bit, but he wouldn't let himself acknowledge it. After a few moments of silence, Derek asked if Casey was ok._

"_I'm fine. You really don't have to sit here with me. I'll get up when I'm able to." Casey kept twiddling her fingers, making Derek think there was something else wrong. _

_But, Derek could not help himself from becoming a jerk, he was still confused with the way he was acting lately. He snapped out of being helpful and reverted back to his character. "What happened? You and Sammy broke up?"_

"_Yeah, we did." Derek just stared at her. There was no emotion in her face or in her eyes. _How can she be fine with this?

_His trademark smirk crept onto his face, "Aww, Sam broke up with you?"_

_Casey looked up at Derek, he saw the anger in her face, but saw something completely different in her eyes. "No, I broke up with him." He had no idea what it was, but the look in her eyes didn't scare him. What scared him was that with her look his heart began to beat a little faster._

_Derek immediately looked away from her. He couldn't look into her eyes anymore. Derek changed the subject, starting to talk about school. He noticed that Casey seemed to sigh in relief, but he ignored it. After a while, the two were chatting about anything and everything, not realizing how much time had passed, or realizing how much they were enjoying themselves without the constant bickering between them. Casey asked for Derek's help to get her to her room, and as he opened her bedroom door, the doorbell rang. _

_Telling Casey he'd be right back, Derek went to answer the door. There stood his date, barely clothed and twisting her hair around one of her fingers. Something about it made his stomach twist, as if it was the worst site he has ever seen. Derek immediately began to think of Casey. He was having so much fun just talking to her, he didn't want it to end. _

"_Oh, hey. I'm sorry that I forgot to call you. Something came up and I can't go out tonight." _What the hell am I doing? Nothing came up. I don't even have any other plans. _Derek couldn't believe he was breaking his date, but his mouth seemed to be moving out of his control. He promised that he would reschedule, and he watched her leave._

_Derek headed into the kitchen to grab an ice pack for Casey. _I blew off a date to spend time with Casey. CASEY! She hates me and I hate her. What am I doing? _Derek made his way into the living room, heading for the stairs. _

_Glancing up, Derek stopped walking and stood still in shock. Standing before him was Casey. She was dressed in a pink tank top and black shorts, less than what his date was wearing, and she was twisting her hair around of one of her fingers. _Oh no._ It suddenly all clicked in Derek's mind. Why he hated Sam and Casey being together, why he picked on her so much, why he wasn't sick seeing her do exactly what his date was doing 5 minutes ago, why he enjoyed the conversation they had in the bathroom a few hours ago. _Why did I have to grow a heart? And why is it for her?

"_So, do you want to watch a movie?" _What is this a date? What is wrong with me? I can't like her! This is Casey, my stepsister, grade grubbing, klutzilla._ But the second Casey agreed, Derek seemed to forget everything he just thought. Handing her the ice pack, he went back into the kitchen to make popcorn._

"_So Derek . . . someone deliver you some flowers?" Casey asked as Derek came back into the living room, holding up the roses._

"_Sam brought them for you earlier today." _

_Casey began to laugh, making Derek's heart beat faster. _I really need to get myself checked out. _He stared at her until she finally stopped. He was really surprised with her reaction. He assumed that although she said that she broke up with him, she would still be upset when his name was brought up._

"_It's funny, you date someone for three months and they still don't know that you hate roses, especially red ones." Casey began to laugh again. "He's been in my room before, I only happen to have a picture of tulips hanging on my wall."_

_After the movie, Derek noticed that Casey fell asleep on the couch. Not wanting to wake her, he carefully picked her up and carried her to her room. After placing her in bed, he looked around at her walls. _Hmm, white tulips with red trim. I guess I'll have to remember that. _Derek could barely sleep that night. He didn't know what made him feel this way. He never thought he could like someone, especially not Casey. But there was something in her eyes, something that made him drift into a peaceful sleep, only seeing those big blue eyes._

* * *

While Derek was shopping, Casey woke up to her alarm. Getting herself out of bed, she made her way into the shower. After getting dressed, she entered the kitchen. Casey noticed a note sitting on the table.

**Casey **

**Got invited to play hockey with the team. Didn't think you would mind me not going with you to the library. Got picked up so you can take the car. See you after your newspaper meeting.**

**Derek**

_But it's Saturday, our date night. _Casey was upset. With classes and hockey and the newspaper, they didn't get to see each other as much as she would have liked. The only time they really spent together was when she tried to teach Derek how to cook, which was a miserable failure. She noticed that he always had a hard time concentrating on what she was saying, even though she had a hard time concentrating on what she was doing, due to their proximity.

After eating a quick breakfast and finding something to take with her for lunch, Casey grabbed her bag and jacket. She went back into the kitchen to grab Derek's car keys, when she noticed something else written underneath them.

**P.S. – It's Saturday, so can you pick up a movie on your way home? Meet you here at 5 so we can go to dinner. **

Casey couldn't help but smile. _I guess he didn't forget. And maybe he is as excited about it as me. _Casey left the apartment and headed for the library.

She had to work on her first article for the newspaper. It was supposed to be a 'How to play a sport', on any sport she wanted. After thinking for about 3 seconds she picked hockey. Somehow, it had become her favorite sport to watch. After doing some research, Casey was able to complete her article and review it within a few hours.

The next thing Casey had the work on was her first assignment for her creative writing class. She looked over the assignment, which was supposed to be any form of writing to be titled 'When your heart changed'. It could have been fiction, but she remembered her professor telling the class that the best work comes from truth of the heart.

Casey's mind went to the time she realized her feelings Derek. That was the day her heart changed. Without realizing it, her hand was moving. It was writing her story as it played in her head. And, just as that fateful night came to an end, so did her story.

**I was crying, crying over my lost love, but I knew I didn't love him. I was the one to end it, I said it was over, and I had no idea why. Things were different, feelings changed, feelings were actually never there at all. I washing away the last three months spent with him. I had no idea why I felt dirty, as if I betrayed someone, I didn't do anything with him but kiss. My heart was always telling me something was wrong with each kiss, but I ignored it. The day we broke up something in me just snapped and I had to end it.**

**Crying in the shower made my head clear. I knew that I made the right decision and I was no longer upset for breaking his heart, because I could not deny my own, even if I had no idea what it was longing for. As I stepped from the shower, wrapped with a towel, I slipped and hit the floor. I closed my eyes in the pain that my back was enduring, but hearing the door open, I quickly opened them.**

**And there he was, what my heart was calling for all along. But it couldn't be, I thought I must have been going crazy. I didn't realize it the first time we met, I didn't realize all the times we fought, but I realized it then. It crashed over me, and I fell hard. It may not have been love at first, but it was something. It wasn't in his smug smirk that I now adore, or in his messy hair that I would love to run my hands through, it was in his eyes. There was something there and I still don't know what it was. His amazing chocolate brown eyes with a hint of honey near the iris. **

**The entire day I tried to deny it, I couldn't let it happen. I kept telling myself no, trying to stay away, but my body pulled me in. When I felt him tuck me into bed, after spending the afternoon talking and evening watching movies, I knew. And that was the day my heart changed, and it's still wishing his heart changes too. **

Casey put her assignment away in her notebook, praying that Derek won't come across it before she had to hand it in. Casey put her things away and left for her newspaper meeting. About an hour later, Casey started driving back to her apartment, stopping to rent a movie on her way.

As she was entering the building she smelt something good cooking. Casey figured it came from another apartment in her building. She opened the door to her apartment and the smell of sauce and melted cheese smacked her in the face. _It smells so good in here. Derek couldn't have cooked though, I didn't teach him how to make sauce yet. _Casey's eyes opened wide. _What if he brought home a girl and she is cooking for him. _

Placing her things down by the door, she quietly shut it and made her way into the kitchen. She wanted to catch whoever was there off guard. Casey saw Derek standing in front of the stove, with his back towards her. She could tell he was tasting the sauce, bringing the spoon to his mouth. _Oh how I wish I was that spoon. _She took in a deep breath, noticing how good everything smelt.

Derek turned around, hearing her inhale. _I hope she likes my cooking. _"Hey there. You hungry?"

"Starved, but I didn't teach you how to make sauce. Did you have some other hot girl come over and teach you how to cook?" _Please say no, please say no._

Laughing, Derek gestured for Casey to sit down. _You're the only hot girl that I would want to teach me how to cook. _"Well, I wouldn't exactly call your mom hot. But she did give me the recipe." Derek placed some spaghetti on both of their plates, pouring sauce over them. He turned to the oven and took out the chicken.

A smile crossed Casey's lips. "So you asked my mom what my favorite meal was?"

"No, I just asked her for the recipe." _Now she knows you know her favorite meal, she's smart, she can put two and two together. _

"Why did you cook this for me? I thought we were going out." _Not that I would mind eating your cooking. _

Derek served the chicken and poured them both a drink. Sitting down he looked into her eyes, "I just wanted to show you how much I appreciate you. . ." _End it there, let her know, don't continue. _". . . for being there for me last night." Derek sighed, he couldn't lose Casey's friendship, even if it was killing him not to tell her.

Casey was surprised at how good the food tasted. Even though she knew it probably tasted 100 times better to her because Derek was the one who cooked. Casey offered to clean the dishes, but Derek refused, telling her to go get the movie started.

When Derek was done with the dishes, he began to melt the chocolate and cut up the fruit he bought. Placing the chocolate in a bowl and the fruit on a plate, he made his way into the living room. Casey was waiting on the couch, remote in hand. Derek sat down and placed the warm bowl on the table to his left, since Casey was to his right, so that she just so happened to have to reach over him for some chocolate.

Throughout the movie, which was yet another romantic one, Casey kept leaning over Derek to dunk her fruit in the chocolate. After she was reaching for her last dunk of chocolate, she tried to pump herself up. _Be bold Casey! He cooked you dinner, you are watching a romantic movie. Just do it. _After placing the last piece of strawberry into her mouth, she turned so her back against Derek's side. She leaned into him and placed her head on his shoulder. _He'll just think I'm tired._

Derek noticed Casey begin to lean into him. _She's probably just tired. It's nothing, don't get your hopes up._ Derek moved his arm so that Casey could get more comfortable, draping it around her body.

Being so close, neither of them could concentrate any longer on the movie. They listened to their own racing heart beats and the rhythm of the other's breathing. When the movie ended, Casey reluctantly got off of Derek.

"I'm going to bed." She headed towards her room, but turned around. "What are you doing tomorrow?"

_Whatever you are. _"Don't really know yet. I have to start on my assignment for my drawing class. What are you doing?"

"Nothing really, I got a lot of work done today. If you want, we can go to the park so you can be inspired to draw and I can bring my laptop and write." Casey felt herself blush, but she really wanted to spend time with Derek.

"Sounds great." _I really don't need a park to inspire me, all I need is you. _"Good night."

Casey went to the bathroom before she went to her room and heard Derek shut his bedroom door. She made her way into her room, tossing her bag on her bed and reached for the light switch. When the light illuminated her room, she noticed a dozen tulips in a vase on her desk. She smiled as she made her way over to smell them, noticing a simple note next to the vase.

**Thanks**


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: This chapter hit a little close to home and was kind of hard to write. But I hope you all enjoy it!

My timeline for this fic (in case anyone was confused)-George and Nora married right before sophomore year started  
-3 months into the marriage Casey and Sam started dating  
-6 months into the marriage Casey and Sam broke up (when Casey and Derek realized feelings for one another)  
-about a year into marriage (summer between sophomore and junior year) is this chapter, but the six months in between realization of feelings and the main part of this chapter are briefly described here  
-flask back in chapter 8 was near the end of their junior year in high school, so they knew one another for a little less than 2 years  
-currently (real time for the fic) they are in their freshman year of college (so it's been 3 years since they met)  
-in some chapters coming up, I will try and make it obvious when flashbacks are happening

Enjoy and review.

Thanksgiving break is coming up soon and I will be home, so I may be able to update more often!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

* * *

Chapter 10: The realization it was love

For about 6 months, Derek and Casey were completely confused. They were both experiencing feelings they never thought they had. Every time their eyes met, they saw something that made their own hearts melt. At first they tried to deny it, tried to pretend it wasn't real, tried to pretend that their hearts didn't feel anything.

Derek was still bitterly mean to her, spitting insults in her face any chance he got. But he began to feel extremely guilty the second the words left his mouth. He would have apologized immediately, but Casey always got right back in his face with an insult of her own. He saw anger on her face, but hurt in her eyes. He would have done anything to take it back, but he didn't want to admit his new found feelings for her, he didn't want to be the weird guy that liked his stepsister.

Casey couldn't help herself from being mad all the time. She didn't want to admit she felt anything for the person who she felt hated her. Whenever they had a battle of the wits and he would insult her, she died a little inside. She didn't want to feel anything for the person to make her feel like crap day in and day out. But right before she would retaliate with an insult of her own, she saw something in his eyes, almost as if he was sorry. Derek never apologized though, which made her even angrier with herself, for liking someone who would never like her back.

They both began to change and they couldn't seem to help themselves. At first, Derek didn't even realize he had changed. When walking through the halls of his high school, he thought he was his usual cocky self, pretending like he owned the place. It wasn't until Edwin told him that he hadn't been out on a date for about 3 weeks that he knew something was wrong. It seemed to hit him all at once, he wasn't as interested in girls like he used to be, he wasn't interested in anyone but Casey.

"Dude, Summer just asked you out and you told her you were busy." Sam said to Derek one day at school with a confused look on his face. "Are you sick?"

Derek thought about the last few weeks, thinking about he had spent most nights in his room, daydreaming about Casey. He did not want to feel the way he did about her. "Um, I must've been out of it. I'm going to catch up with Summer." Derek thought that dating the most popular girl in school would get his mind off of Casey.

Derek had made plans to go to dinner and a movie with Summer that evening, so he could try to get his mind off of Casey. However, all night he compared Summer to Casey. He compared their looks, manners, eating habits, the way they breathed. By the end of the night he had enough of Summer, completely bored with everything about her. When he got home, he had planned to date more than ever, to try and get Casey out of his head.

For about a month, Derek went on as many dates as he could. He called every number in his cell phone, making dates for every night of the week. By the end of each date, he couldn't help but be sick of the girl he was with. There was just something missing in each and every one of them. There wasn't a sparkle in their eyes or an insult at the tip of their tongue. Their features seemed bland and they didn't have a thought in their heads. They weren't feisty or annoying. Every night another number was deleted from his phone.

After his month of trying, Derek finally gave in and stopped dating all together. He accepted that he was attracted to Casey, but he told himself it was only a physical attraction, that he only liked the way she looked. He figured he would eventually get over it. Soon though, he found himself wanting to talk to Casey, to spend time with her, learn everything he could about her. He initially did the only thing he knew how to do to spend time with her, argue. But it began to take a toll on his heart.

Without noticing it, he wanted to become a better person. Derek wanted to make something of his life, wanted to go to college and have goals. It didn't dawn on him that he was doing all of this for Casey.

He began paying attention in school, trying to complete his assignments on time. But since he never cared before it was hard for him to jump into the academic world he neglected for so long. Coming home from school one day, he saw Casey sitting at the dining room table, working on her homework. Derek, wanting to be near Casey, decided he would sit next to her and do his homework as well.

Noticing Derek actually doing something for school Casey couldn't help but comment. "So, did you lose a bet or something?"

"No, I guess I just want to change my ways." It was then that Derek knew that he wanted to change for Casey. She brought out the best in him, even if she didn't know it. She was the thing making him want to change. _I can't believe this might be more than just a crush._

Derek made it a ritual to do homework with Casey almost every night. He did not want to have anyone think that he just wanted to spend time with Casey, so he gave everyone the excuse of wanting to get into a good college and that he needed good grades for a scholarship. Derek began to be confident enough to ask Casey for help with his classes and assignments, finding that it was a great way to learn and have a normal conversation with her. He did still argue with her at any chance he got, he was too afraid that she would notice his feelings.

By the end of their sophomore year in high school, Derek was in deep. He knew he liked Casey, but he didn't realize how big his crush had become. He felt completely drawn to her. He was interested in her thoughts and opinions, finding that he shared a lot of the same ideas as Casey. They would hang out more around the house, not fighting as much, but still enough so she wouldn't think anything of it. Derek also threw himself into his school work and hockey, actually looking forward to his future. He didn't realize that he pictured that future with Casey.

Casey seemed to be in the same dilemma Derek was in. Although she was still new to the school and town, she still tried to date other people to get Derek out of her mind. She couldn't understand how he planted himself in her head. He was all she could think about, all she could see when she closed her eyes.

It dawned on Casey why she dated Sam, it was to get Derek's attention. She didn't realize it at the time, but she was never really attracted to Sam. It was something in the way that Derek acted when Sam began to talk to Casey that made Casey want his attention more. She never thought that she would actually date Sam, but when he asked her out, it seemed like the logical thing to do. Deep down, Casey couldn't admit to liking Derek, so dating someone made it seem like there were no feelings there at all. They had a good time on dates and seemed to have a lot in common, but she was bored with him.

When she started accepting dates after she broke up with Sam, she noticed that all of these other guys were missing something as well. None of them seemed up to par with the image she held in her head. She wanted someone exciting and daring. Someone who could make her think and second-guess herself. She wanted someone who would keep her on her toes.

The dates Casey had been on were terrible. She was bored during each and every one of them. They seemed more like friends than someone she could be in a relationship with. The guys that asked her out were lacking a quality she wanted. She would try to settle and enjoy her dates, but her heart always came up empty in the end. She didn't have butterflies dancing in her stomach when she looked into their eyes, the eyes that could not compare to Derek's.

Trying her best, she wanted to push all thoughts of Derek out of her mind. She would only admit to herself that she found his appearance attractive, that there was nothing more than his looks. Casey refused to believe that Derek was the one she was comparing every guy to. She did not want Derek to be the one to make her stomach bunch into knots with a single glance. She did not want to be another girl to fall for Derek Venturi. She tried to block out her feelings, tried not to think about him, but he was always there. He crept into her head when she was listening to music, he was in her dreams almost every night, and one day he was there in person.

Casey gave in. She knew she had feelings for Derek, but she swore to herself that they were merely physical, that it was only the way he looked. She thought they would one day go away. But, she felt her heart melt every time their eyes met, she felt the effect they had on her. She hoped that she could get some insight into Derek's complex personality by one look into his eyes, but she became lost whenever they found her own. And it wasn't only his eyes, it was everything about him. His smug smirk and genuine smile, his voice, his hair, it was everything.

One day Derek seemed to be a completely different person to Casey, interested in his school work and future. Casey couldn't help but smile to herself when she would think about this new side of him that she never saw before. It was like he didn't need to act cool around her, he could just be himself. This had made Casey fall even harder. He had started to ask Casey for help with his work, ask her to explain things he didn't understand. Although her heart leapt at the chance to spend time with Derek, she refused at first. She told herself that she needed to get over this silly school girl crush, and not spending time with Derek would be the only way.

After rejecting his plea for help, Casey couldn't help but see something in his eyes, like her refusal hurt him. A few days later, Casey couldn't help but be drawn to Derek. She wanted to help him, wanted to be the one to change him for the better. They began to do homework together all of the time. This changed Casey and she didn't know why. She found herself open up to Derek. She felt like she could be herself when he was around, that he brought her out of her protective shell and she was no longer afraid of what others thought about her.

Studying together led to spending time hanging out together. Casey wanted to know everything she could about Derek. She found that they shared a lot of the same interests and thoughts. They had similar ideas on life and where they wanted their futures to take them. Casey began thinking about her future more, where she wanted to go to college, where she wanted to live and raise a family. She didn't realize that she pictured that future with Derek.

When the summer started, Casey and Derek wanted to still spend time with one another. But without homework bringing to two together, they thought the other would think it was weird to spend time together. Fighting still ensued between to two, because that was the only way they thought they would be able to connect. Although there were not as many hurtful comments, the fact that they were fighting made them upset all the time.

* * *

The Venturis and MacDonalds were invited Derek's cousin's wedding, which was to be held in the beginning of July. Since Casey and Derek were old enough, they received separate invitations from the one sent to the family as a whole, telling them they were allowed a guest each. Since neither had dated for about 5 months now, and neither had planned on dating again for a while, they both sent back their invitations, saying they would be going alone.

When the day of the wedding came, the Venturi/MacDonald family piled into the minivan and headed to the hall, which was an hour away. They decided that since Marti was still young, they would not attend the ceremony and only go to the reception. Derek was sitting to the right of Marti, who was to the right of Casey, all the way in the back row.

Derek couldn't believe how amazing Casey looked. Her hair was down with the ends slightly curled. She was wearing a simple hunter green dress that fell right above her knees, held up by thin spaghetti straps. He found that the color looked great against her complexion, complementing her in every way. Throughout the entire ride, he kept pretending to play with Marti, only to sneak glances in Casey's direction.

Not noticing the stares coming from Derek, Casey couldn't help but continuously try to look at him, while pretending to read. She thought he looked great. Derek was wearing black pants and a buttoned hunter green shirt with his signature leather jacket over it. _Green is definitely his color._ Casey had thought Derek was attractive for quite some time now, but she never thought he could look this good. She even loved the way his hair looked messy, but every strand in exactly the right place.

When they finally arrived at the reception, George went to find their place cards so that they could find their way to their table. Coming back a few minutes later, he informed Nora and the three youngest children that they were at table 3. He handed Derek two cards, before turning to walk into the room. Derek looked at the cards in his hands.

**Derek Venturi – Table 11**

**Casey Venturi – Table 11**

_Maybe one day_ Derek thought to himself with a smile forming on his lips. His smiled immediately faltered. _What? . . . I cannot be thinking about marriage. This is crazy, I'm not in love with her, it's a silly crush. The only way Casey would take my last name is if my dad adopted her._ Dismissing his earlier happiness of Casey's placement card having his last name, he quickly handed her the card and made his way into the hall.

When Casey glanced down, a small smile tugged at her mouth. She couldn't believe that it said Venturi after her name. _Well, it does have a nice sound to it . . . wait, what am I saying? Am I going crazy? I can't be in love with Derek, so I can't think about marrying him._ Casey placed the card into her handbag and followed Derek into the room.

The room that the reception was in looked amazing with all of the flowers and decorations. There was a huge dance floor, with a small table in front of it for the new bride and groom. Tables went along the walls, all the way around the dance floor. Casey and Derek noticed that their family was at a table near the main doors, with one of Derek's aunts and some of his younger cousins. Looking around the room, they spotted their own table, in the back corner near doors that lead to a balcony, directly across the room from their family's.

Derek and Casey sat down at their table, looking at the other people sitting with them. George was not very close with his relatives, so Derek wasn't sure if the people at the table were family or not. After a few moments, everyone started introducing themselves and their dates. They were all cousins of Derek's, a few years older than Derek and Casey. All of them had brought dates with them, so each couple was going on about how long they have been together and when they planned on getting married.

After everyone except Casey and Derek introduced themselves, one of Derek's cousins's turned to them and asked, "So when do you two plan on tying the knot?"

Derek almost choked on his water, while Casey turned beet red and looked at the table. Neither wanted to make eye contact with anyone at the table, especially each other. Derek finally said when he was able to, "We are actually step-siblings, my dad married her mom about a year ago." _And I was thinking about our own wedding a few minutes ago._

His cousin, along with everyone else at the table gave them a funny look. Someone else said, "Oh, I thought you were together. You two look good together and your outfits do match." It was then that they both realized they were wearing the same color, which made them both blush.

After a little while, the festivities were underway. People were up dancing for a few songs, then the meal was served. During dinner, Casey and Derek spoke more to the other people at their table, explaining things like school and their home situation of being in a blended family. Casey did not want to mention that they bickered all the time, and she was surprised that Derek didn't bring it up either. She was happy that they were having a conversation without arguing, and she didn't want to ruin it.

After the meal, Casey's heart began to sink into her stomach. She was not expecting to have the reaction that she was having. Casey was glad that she and Derek grabbed the seats closest to the wall, because she did not want anyone to see her at this time. At first, she didn't even feel the tears slowly slipping out of her eyes and gliding down her cheeks. It was when Derek touched her hand that she had noticed she was crying.

The head of the band announced that it was time for the father/daughter dance. Everyone watched as the father of the bride made his way to the center of the dance floor with his daughter. Everyone was turned to look on as they danced. For the hundredth time that night, Derek felt his eyes pulled towards Casey. It was then that he noticed that she was crying. He had no idea why, but was sure that she didn't want him to make a scene. Derek grabbed her hand and gestured towards the doors behind them.

Casey and Derek made their way outside onto the balcony. Although it was the middle of the summer, there was still a cool breeze in the air. Casey felt the cold tears on her face, but she made no motion to wipe them away. She felt that she needed to get them out, so that they would never come back to haunt her. Casey didn't realize that she was shivering, until she felt the warmth of Derek's jacket around her shoulders. She looked up and saw him making his way towards the railing, leaning against and peering out at the night sky. Standing next to him, she mumbled a thanks for the jacket and stared up with him, the tears still falling from her face.

"You want to tell me why you're crying?" Derek asked, breaking the calm silence.

A little surprised at the concern in his voice, Casey slowly nodded and opened her mouth. But when she tried to talk, sobs came out and she began to cry harder than before. Derek didn't know what to do, but it pained him to see Casey so upset about something. Without thinking, he wrapped his arms around Casey, embracing her in a tight hug. _This is the first hug we ever had, _they both thought. Derek also thought how strange it was that Casey seemed to fit perfectly in his arms.

After a few minutes of crying, Casey began to calm down but stayed in Derek's embrace. She felt as though her pain went away when she was in his arms, like he would never cause as much pain as she was in.

"Do you know anything about my dad?" When Casey felt Derek shake his head she continued. "Well, his name was Michael and he died about a year before my mom married George."

"Is that why you're crying? Do you miss him?" Derek never heard any of the MacDonalds mention their father before and he always thought it would be rude to ask. But now he felt like he needed to know, like he needed to know what was hurting Casey so much.

"That's not it at all. He wasn't exactly the best dad in the world. He cheated on my mom a lot. He cheated on her when she was pregnant with me, during the five years between me and Lizzie, and when my mom got pregnant with Lizzie." Casey felt herself begin to tear up, but she didn't want to cry anymore. She tried to bury her head into further into Derek's chest, if only to hold back the tears.

Feeling Casey getting upset, Derek tightened is grip around her, letting her know he was there for her. He couldn't come up with a response to what she just told him, he thought Nora wouldn't take anything like that. Then he was shocked to hear what Casey said next.

"He also abused my mom, both mentally and physically. You would never think that anything like this would have happened to her by knowing her now. She became really strong over the years. But, back then she was always weak around him, letting him treat her like she was nothing." Casey sighed, as if trying to forget everything that had happened when it came to her father.

Derek felt rage inside of him growing, it was hurting him knowing that something pained Casey so much. He wanted to stop her, make her forget anything that ever upset her, but he knew she needed to talk it out and he planned on being there for her. "When my mom got pregnant with Lizzie, my dad gave my mom an ultimatum. He said it was either she had the child and they would be getting a divorce or she would have an abortion and he would stay with her. Needless to say, they got a divorce."

Derek was trying to comprehend everything that Casey was saying. He didn't think that such a strong person would have such a bad childhood. Casey never showed signs of being unhappy or anything that would affect her in such a way. "I'm sorry Case," was all that Derek was able to get out.

"Don't be. He was never really there for us. He never supported us or acted like he cared. Well, at first he would take me out with him, like to the movies or something like that. But he eventually stopped calling, or told me that it was all my mom's fault." Casey couldn't help but begin to tear up. She wished that the tears would end, but she never allowed herself to feel anything for the man that was her father, so now everything was coming out at once. "He began to treat me like shit, and never wanted anything to do with Lizzie. He remarried and decided that his first family wasn't good enough."

Casey was completely in tears now, nothing but sobs coming out of her throat. Derek released his grip on Casey for a moment, just so he could see her face. She was red and her face had tear marks along her cheeks. Derek also noticed her face was a little scrunched up, like she was trying to hold off the tears that were coming. _I can't believe she could look this amazing while crying. _Derek reached his hand up and wiped his thumb below her eyes, not even realizing he was doing it. The feel of his thumb on her face made her eyes close, relishing in the feeling of his touch. Derek noticed her eyes closed, be he thought that she was just upset.

He pulled her back into a hug and whispered into her ear soothing words. "You are more than enough Case, I'm sorry you're father couldn't see how great you are." Derek was amazed at how incredible Casey was. She was remarkable, so perfect, yet she had such a bad childhood. He wondered how she could have such a strong persona when so much had happened to her.

Casey wanted to believe that Derek's words had another meaning, other than just trying to calm her down, but she just figured he felt bad for her. Casey decided to continue when her tears subdued a little, "I didn't speak to him for years, but one day he called me up and wanted to meet. I was skeptical at first, telling him that I only want to talk on the phone for a while. He seemed very sincere, telling me he was sorry for all the time lost and that he changed. A few weeks later I found out that all he wanted from me was money, because he was divorcing his second wife and needed some money to get himself situated. He never wanted to reconnect with me, he just wanted to use me."

Feeling the tears come, she pushed them back. She had to finish before she cried another tear for the man that was supposed to be her father. "I didn't talk to him after that. A few years later my mom got a letter in the mail from his insurance company. Apparently he had stomach cancer and died in the hospital. His insurance company was informing my mother that he changed his will and his current girlfriend received everything, not that I would want anything from that man. When my mom contacted his girlfriend, she yelled at my mom. His girlfriend said that my father tried to reach out for us while on his deathbed and we refused to see him, she said that he hated us. He never tried to make contact, but I honestly don't think I would have gone to see him. He caused so much pain in my life, I don't think I could have faced him."

Derek felt Casey shiver, even though she was wearing his jacket. He began to rub her arm with his hands, trying to comfort her. He wanted to be there for her, to take away her pain, he just didn't know what to say. He wanted to show her how he felt, that he would try to never cause her so much pain, but he couldn't. He knew after that night he had to be Derek, the person to piss her off. But for now, he would hold her up, let her talk it out, be her shoulder to cry on. He couldn't tell her that he liked her, that he wanted to hold her up everyday. Derek couldn't show his true feelings, because she wouldn't have believed him and it might have caused her more pain, and could not cause any more pain in her life.

"So he's gone and I never shed a single tear, until now that is. It just kind of hit me in there, during the father/daughter dance. I am never going to have that. I am never going to be walked down the aisle by my father. I don't think I would have invited him anyway, but now I know I will never have the chance. I am never going to know if he ever even loved me." With that, Casey started crying again, this time though she couldn't stop the tears.

"Hey, hey, hey. Don't you dare cry over him, he's not worth it. You're worth so much and if he didn't care than it's his problem. Besides, I'm sure my dad would walk you down the aisle and have that dance with you in a heartbeat." _That's great, tell the girl that you plan on marrying that your own father will walk her down the aisle at your wedding._ This time, Derek didn't think about taking that thought back. He knew he meant it. His love for her was always there, and now that he saw her at her possible worst, he couldn't love her any less. But Derek would never tell her how he felt, it would be too much for his heart to get rejected. He never thought he would fall in love, but he did, and he never wanted to know the pain of getting his heart stomped on.

As Derek was realizing the love he had for Casey, she realized the same thing. She was never able to tell that story to anyone, never able to let herself cry in front of anyone. But being there, in Derek's arms, made her feel alive. She knew that what was in her heart was love. She loved Derek for everything he was. He was an amazing older brother to Marti and Edwin, a great hockey player, he was even turning into someone who cared about his grades and where he was going in life. Casey also loved how great he was to her in her time of need for a shoulder to cry on, how great of a listener he was, how he didn't once tell her anything unnecessary that anyone else would have. But her heart broke a little when he said that his father would walk her down the aisle at her wedding, because she had realized that she wanted that wedding with him. So she swore that she would never tell him her feelings, she couldn't take any more heartbreak in her life.

When Casey was able to go back inside, they went to the their table. They heard a band member announce that it would be the last song of the evening, telling everyone to get on the dance floor. Casey wanted to dance with Derek, to be in his arms again, but she couldn't ask. Her heart leapt when she heard him ask, "Since we didn't dance all night, would you want to dance with me now?"

Casey took off Derek's jacket and followed him onto the dance floor. Derek was afraid at first as to how close he should hold Casey to his body, but he relaxed when she got as close as she could, leaning her head on his chest. It was a great night for both of them. They didn't fight, they realized their feelings and now they were dancing with the one person they wanted to dance every single dance for the rest of their lives with. Neither wanted it to end.

"Derek, why do we fight all the time?" Casey asked, hoping that he wouldn't say because he hated her.

Derek couldn't tell her that it was because he wanted to be near her, wanting to spend time with her. He shrugged, "I don't know. It's just what we do Case. I love to see you riled up, like I live to annoy you. But I would never mean to deliberately hurt you."

A little shocked that Derek didn't always mean the hurtful things that came from his mouth, Casey just nodded her head against his chest. "Yeah, I guess I just live to annoy you too. But I really liked that we were civil tonight, I would have never expected we could be this nice to each other."

"I agree, it was really nice." Derek wanted it to end at that, but he was afraid Casey would see why he said it was nice, see that he actually loved her. "But I don't think I could stop picking on you."

Casey closed her eyes, she knew that she couldn't change being mean to him as well, she couldn't be nice all the time, afraid he would see how she really felt. "Yeah, but do you think we can have more of this non-fighting? I really don't want to hurt anymore. Can we make some sort of agreement?"

Derek didn't want to hurt Casey ever again, he did not want to see the pain in her eyes that he just saw minutes before. "Like what?" he asked, hoping she would ask for them not to fight again.

"Maybe we could limit our insults, so that we could still get them out of our system. Maybe only 5 a day?" _Please agree, I don't think I could be mean to you all the time now without breaking my heart._

Thinking for a second, Derek wanted to tell her that he didn't even want the 5, but he knew he still had to be like the person she met a year ago, the person who got joy out of making fun of her. "That sounds great. Only 5 insults a day, and then we can be nice the rest of the time."

The song ended and everyone was beginning to head off the dance floor and back to their seats. Casey and Derek pulled apart, each with a smile on their face. Derek looked into Casey's eyes, getting lost for a second, before he leaned down and kissed her cheek. When he pulled back, he leaned to her ear and whispered, "by the way, you look beautiful in green MacDonald." _Why would I say that? I'm supposed to not show my feelings._

Casey couldn't help but blush, even though she thought he was just trying to be nice. She lightly nudged his arm and said "Yeah well, it suits you too Venturi."


	11. Chapter 11

A/N: I know that this chapter is shorter than usual and took a little longer, but I kind of got a little bit of writer's block. I know where I want to go and what I want to happen, but the journey became a little hard. I've been thinking a lot about the next few chapter to come, and I'm really excited to write them. Hopefully I will be able to write them a little faster.

Enjoy and review.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

* * *

Chapter 11: The Invitation

It would have been too much of a heart break if they ever told another soul. Despite the fear of rejection, they were afraid of judgment. Casey didn't want to be known as the freak that fell in love with her stepbrother. She wouldn't be able to handle the criticizing eyes on her all the time. And Derek was mostly afraid of the reaction from his dad and Nora. He didn't want them to look at him as a disappointment.

They both held their feelings in for so long, both afraid of the consequences of letting their feelings out. Neither of them had ever said a word of how they felt to anyone. Feelings were bottled up and never let out, making them both feel completely alone.

Friends was something they needed, something that they thought would help ease the pain of feeling alone. They had hoped that their friends would understand of their weird situation, but with the friends they had, Casey and Derek could still tell no one.

Emily was always a great friend to Casey, always understanding of Casey's insane ways and her need to be the best at everything she did. But now that they were 2 hours apart, they weren't able to talk as much as Casey liked.

Their friendship did take a toll on Casey during the first few months that she realized how she felt about Derek. Emily had always been madly in love with Derek, fawning over him every chance she got. Casey couldn't take it. It drove her crazy to sit there and listen to her friend talk about Derek, since Casey could only disagree, while inside she was agreeing. It made her mad that she wasn't able to have a healthy crush, to express herself to anyone. Casey was only able to share her feelings with herself, in the privacy of her own room.

Things began to get better for Casey when Emily started dating some guy Trevor in their grade. Emily stopped swooning over Derek, which made Casey's frustrations over the situation alleviate a little. But Casey still couldn't bring herself to tell Emily of her own feelings. She thought that her feelings were abnormal and would only make her seem like a _monstrosity_ to society. So Casey was left all alone with her feelings growing by the day, only sharing them with her diary.

Derek was always surrounded by people throughout high school. Although he didn't really consider many of them friends, he was always surrounded. But he was Derek Venturi, someone who didn't have feelings. So when he actually began to like Casey, he couldn't let his feelings show. It wasn't that he was ashamed of liking Casey, he actually wanted to let everyone know, so that no one else who try to go out with her. Derek couldn't tell people because he knew it looked bad to the world, having feelings for his stepsister would definitely make him public enemy #1.

Sam was another problem Derek had when he began to like Casey. Sam was Derek's best friend and Casey's ex-boyfriend, and Sam still had feelings for Casey after they broke up. It was difficult for Derek to tell Sam that Casey was just being a bitch and he just needed to get over her, when in all actuality Derek knew he himself couldn't get over her. He understood when Sam would describe every perfect thing about Casey, but he had to pretend everything Sam said was a lie.

If there was anyone that Derek would have admitted his feelings to, it would have been Sam. They were friends for over 10 years, and he knew Sam would have understood, only if he hadn't dated Casey. But there was the problem that Sam was Casey's ex, and although they were best friends, Derek could never say anything. It would have been an awkward conversation with a million different horrible outcomes that played in Derek's head, every time he thought he was going to say something to Sam. So Derek was left keeping everything inside for 3 years, expressing his feelings to himself, in the comfort of his room with the door locked.

* * *

It's been about 2 weeks since Derek made Casey dinner. They hadn't really spoken much about that night, both being too embarrassed to mention anything. Derek had wanted to tell her how he felt, and he thought that Casey would have put it all together. Unfortunately for Derek, Casey didn't say a thing, besides a quick thanks for her flowers.

Casey wanted that night to mean so much more, so much more than what she thought Derek thought it meant. She wanted it to show that Derek cared more for her than she thought he did. Casey wanted Derek to say something, anything that would show that it meant more than a thank you. But he didn't, and she was afraid of embarrassing herself, so she didn't either.

It was Thursday night and they were in the middle of making dinner. Casey was trying to teach Derek how to make baked ziti, but she found that Derek's mind seemed to be somewhere else. She couldn't help but wonder why he always seemed to have a problem concentrating when she was trying to teach him how to cook, when he made an amazing meal for her all by himself.

As Derek sat at the table, shredding the mozzarella cheese for their meal, Derek wasn't able to keep his mind focused. He couldn't help but find every move she made mesmerizing. From the way she poured the pasta into the pot of boiling water or tasted the sauce, everything drove him crazy. He faintly heard her voice in the background, but her movements kept him in a trance.

Derek was finally broken from his trance when he heard the doorbell ring. He was about to get up to answer the door when Casey put a hand on his shoulder, telling him she would get it. Her hand sent a chill down his spine, it was something about the way he wanted the touch to mean more, but he thought that she meant nothing other than telling him to stay seated.

Initially, Derek was worried that it would be some guy at the door, but his worries subsided when he heard the voice of a girl.

Casey came face to face with a tall blond when she opened the door. _This girl better not be here for Derek._ "Can I help you?"

"Does a Derek Venturi live here?" _Oh no, she is here for Derek. _Casey nodded, not wanting to let the girl into the apartment. The girl continued, "Well, this was delivered about a week ago to my apartment, I just hadn't gotten the chance to drop it off."

"Oh, thanks." Casey quickly grabbed the piece of mail from the perfectly manicured hand and shut the door. She didn't want to look at the blond popping the gum between her teeth anymore.

Making her way through the living room, she looked down at the piece of mail. It was actually addressed to both Derek Venturi and Casey MacDonald. _What a stupid slut, she sees a guys name and can't even read any further to see that it was addressed to a girl as well. _As she walked into the kitchen she began to open the envelope and pull out an invitation.

Reading it over, Casey noticed it was from her friend Emily's parents. They were known to throw a huge party every year for Halloween. But this year they were going on vacation and they decided to have their annual party a few weeks earlier.

Casey stopped reading when she heard Derek complain at how his hands were all cheesy from preparing dinner.

"Yeah, well it suits your personality." Casey said teasingly, not wanting to let the moment pass.

"Ha ha, very funny Case." Derek said rolling his eyes while he washed his hands. Turning around he noticed Casey reading something. "What's that?"

"An invitation to a party. Apparently the Davis' are going away this Halloween and their party will be a little earlier than usual."

Derek loved the Davis' parties. They were usually a week or so before Halloween, so that people didn't have to cancel their Halloween plans to go to their party. He also loved that each year had a specific theme. Derek's all time favorite was sports, because he didn't have to get a costume, he just wore his hockey uniform.

"What's the theme this year?" _Maybe conjoined twins and we can go together_ Derek thought.

Casey looked back down at the invitation, "Masquerade ball, everyone has to wear a mask." Then Casey's eyes fell on something she wasn't expecting. She let out a groan of frustration before she continued. "It seems that early to them is about a month early, the party is this Saturday."

Derek felt his smile falter. Saturday was the night they set aside to spend together, even though they spent almost every night together. "But that's our dat . . ."_shit, you can't say date night. _"Day to spend in the library working on our homework." Derek knew that was the worst cover he ever came up with, but he was hoping Casey bought it.

_And it's our date night . . . don't seem too desperate to want to stay here with him. _"Yeah, I know, but I don't really have work to do this weekend. I also kind of miss everyone. But if you don't want to go . . ."

Derek cut Casey off, "No, I want to go. I really miss Marti and I'm sure that you want to see Emily again. But I have a game tomorrow, so we would have to leave Saturday morning." _I guess she doesn't want to stay here with me. I should just be excited to be seeing everyone again._

Casey agreed and they finished making dinner. Neither said much throughout the meal because they both were a little upset about not having their movie night that week. Derek wanted to ask Casey if she wanted to see a movie on Friday night after his game, but he didn't want to seem too eager.

Later that night, Casey called her mother to inform her that they would be coming home on Saturday for the party. After a few minutes of normal conversation, Casey was surprised by the change in discussion with her mother.

"So, how is everything going with you and Derek?"

"What do you mean mom? We haven't fought in years if that's what you mean." Casey only assumed that Nora was thinking that they were at each other's throats not getting along.

Nora sighed, she didn't want to say anything that would give her knowledge away. "I was just wondering if anything came about after Derek cooked you dinner."

Casey was a little confused about her mother's tone and she thought that Nora knew something she didn't know. "It was just a thank you dinner. Did Derek tell you it was anything else?" Casey couldn't help but have a little hope come out in her voice.

"No honey, that's all he told me." _But I sure hoped he told you something different. _"Well, I'll see you in a few days then. See you when you get here." After a short goodbye, they both hung up the phone.

Casey was beyond confused. She felt that Derek told her mom something more, but she knew that her mom would have told her. But being scared about her feelings coming out, Casey wouldn't confront either Derek or her mom. But she did decide that she needed to spend some more time with Derek, as if it would help her find out more than what she knew, hoping something would slip from his lips.

Walking across the hallway, Casey knocked on Derek's door. It wasn't very late, but when Casey saw Derek she knew he had been lying in bed. His hair was standing up all over the place, making Casey want to run her hands through it, to smoothen it out.

Using all of her will power not to touch him, Casey asked "Since your game is late tomorrow, do you want to go out to dinner instead of cooking?" _It could make up for missing our Saturday night date._

Derek couldn't help but smile. He was lying in bed for the past hour trying to gain the courage to ask Casey what she just asked him. "Sure Casey. Do you also want to rent a movie? It could be like our Saturday night, but on Friday."

"Sounds like a plan." _And a date. _She said before saying goodnight and heading to her room. She was smiling, knowing that she would be getting her date night after all. Little did she know that Derek was also smiling, thinking the same thing.


	12. Chapter 12

A/N: I decided to take some time from the holiday's festivities, meaning arguments with my family, to write a chapter.

Happy Thanksgiving to those who celebrate it and happy third Thursday in November to those who don't. 

Also, thanks to all the reviewers! I didn't ever think I would ever have as many as I have now. They make my little heart want to write more for all of you!

Enjoy and review!

PS – Does anyone know what's going on with the emails? I haven't received a single notification of a story update or review in a while. I miss them!

* * *

Chapter 12: Anyone else's eyes

Friday came and went extremely fast. With school, Derek's hockey game, dinner and their movie, both Derek and Casey were too tired to think about the upcoming weekend. Although neither had thought of it as anything more than their first weekend back home, both were really excited. It was something about leaving their new life for the first time, interacting with old friends, going back to that wall.

Derek had missed that wall. He missed how close it made the two of them. Sure they had been very close in their apartment and spent a lot of time together, but it was different. That wall represented a lot to him. It was something that reminded him of Casey. It reminded him of his love for her, all of those nights he sat at home staring at that wall. It made him think of how he had changed, matured over the years. He was no longer the boy that didn't care about anything. Derek now cared about his life, his future, his grades and someone other than himself. That wall was so much than a wall to him, it was his life and he was happy to be going back to it.

Casey too missed that wall. It was something she longed for these past three weeks she had been away from it. There was something about it that she needed in her life, or rather what was behind it. Casey knew that Derek had inspired the best in her. She had been able to express herself so much better when looking at that wall. She put all of her emotions in her writing when in the presence of that wall. Everything she felt was poured out. Her dreams of wanting to become a writer and teacher came to her while looking at the wall. That wall made her whole life what it was and she was excited to be seeing it again.

Before they knew it, they were in Derek's jeep, heading back to their old life. It wasn't too early in the morning, but Casey couldn't help but fall asleep. The silence gave Derek a lot of time to think.

He knew he loved Casey, he knew he saw her in his future, but he couldn't help but wonder if he was in hers. Since they both had gotten really close over the years, Derek couldn't help but wonder if Casey thought of him as a brother. That was Derek's worst fear. It pained him to think that in 5 years Casey could be married and Derek would be standing in the sidelines, watching the love of his life marry someone else.

But what could Derek really do? It wasn't like loving a stepsibling in a non-sibling way was accepted. He would have to eventually accept a life without Casey, but he decided at that moment that he wouldn't give up without a fight. It was just the details of his agenda that he didn't know. Those bothersome questions of when, where and how.

As Derek was contemplating the biggest decision of his life, Casey dreamt her worst fears. She saw herself in a church, at the alter, with Derek in front of her. He was looking in her eyes and she could almost feel the love radiating off of him. She looked around and saw all the happy faces in their seats. Everything was perfect. It wasn't until she heard the music letting everyone know it was their time to stand and look towards the back of the church.

Casey's heart sank. It was then that she noticed that she was far from Derek instead of right in front of him. It was then that she realized that she was in a horrible bride maid's dress. It was then that she realized that Derek was mouthing 'I love you' to someone else, the person that was walking up the aisle. Casey couldn't help but wonder what made her so special, what she did that made his eyes light up, what she had that Casey didn't.

As Derek pulled into the driveway of their parent's house, he gently shook Casey, telling her that they were home. _This is not our home though_ Casey thought. It was then that she decided that she had to know if that girl in the white dress could ever be her. She had to fight for what she wanted. But, alike Derek, there were those pesky questions lurking in her head.

* * *

Making their way into the house, they noticed something very strange. It was quiet, eerily quiet. They made their way into the kitchen to find a note on the counter. 

**Welcome back guys. We went to the mall to get a few last minute things for the Davis' party tonight. There are some leftovers in the fridge if you're hungry. See you later this afternoon.**

**Love George, Nora, Edwin, Lizzie and Marti**

After eating a quick lunch, Casey and Derek made their way up the stairs and to their respective rooms. Simultaneously, both sets of eyes made their way to the wall. Instantly, they both hated it. They wanted it gone, out of the way. But how could they make it disappear? It wasn't like either one could just run up to the other's door and shout 'I love you', they knew this was real life and not a sappy '80s movie. Their words and timing needed to be precise. This secret was hidden for so long, neither wanted it to be blurted out without specific precautions. This was going to be harder than either of them thought.

Casey finally looked away from the wall. It was getting late in the day and she needed to think about getting ready for the party. She knew what she planned on wearing the second she read the invitation.

_It was a hunter green dress that fell to the floor. It was tight at the top and tied like a corset in the back, leaving her shoulders bare. The bottom billowed out around her waist, with black stringy designs from her waist to the floor. Casey thought that she looked really good in it while looking at herself in the mirror. And she also thought that Derek would like it._

_That day Casey borrowed Derek's jeep while he was out with his friends. She said she had to pick up something from the mall and he gave her his keys without a problem. It was true that Casey wanted to go to the mall, but she really didn't need to pick anything up. _

_It was about a month before prom and Casey decided that she wasn't going. She was asked by a few guys, but not the one she wanted to ask her. Casey decided she wasn't going to ruin anyone's night by moping around because she wasn't with the person she wanted to go with, so she turned all of her offers down._

_However, every time Casey went to the mall she was drawn to the dress department. She wanted to get dressed up, have her hair done, apply the perfect make-up, and dance the night away. But, she never let herself try on a dress, afraid it would cause her to cave and accept a date with someone she didn't want to go with._

_That particular day, Casey decided she just needed to try on a dress, to get it out of her system. So she drove Derek's jeep to the next town, to go to a mall that no one she knew would see her. She grabbed a few dresses and made her way into the dressing room. None of them were anything special, just normal dresses. When she was about to leave the store, Casey noticed a rack towards the back of the department._

_The green caught her eye and it called her over to it. She quickly found her size and walked over to the dressing room. She fell in love with the dress. It looked great on her and she knew that Derek would love the color. Without thinking, Casey brought it over the register, paid for it and made her way to the jeep._

_On her way home, Casey realized what she did. _What was I thinking? It's not like I'm even going to prom. And I wouldn't want to wear this dress for anyone besides Derek._ After berating herself the entire drive home, Casey decided it was a really great dress and that it didn't cost that much. She would keep it, maybe wear it someday in the future._

Unfortunately, Derek had no idea what he planned on wearing. He had nothing that would be considered a costume for a masquerade party. Derek made his way out of his room and walked the few steps to Casey's door. Knocking on the open door, he waited for Casey to look in his direction.

"Do you need to go to the mall to pick up a costume?"

She looked into her closet, seeing the black bag covering the green dress in the back. "No thanks, I have a costume."

Derek left the house and drove his way to the mall. While browsing through the only store set up for Halloween, he couldn't help but think about that night. He hadn't danced with Casey since his cousin's wedding and he was hoping that tonight he could dance with her.

There were not many occasions that he has been able to dance with her since the wedding, but one stuck out in his head. Derek could have danced with Casey at their senior prom, it was just too bad that neither of them attended.

_Derek tried to avoid all discussion about prom as best as he could. When his hockey friends would talk about limos and tuxedos, he would say he needed to be somewhere. It wasn't that Derek couldn't get a date. He knew that he could have probably stolen any of his friends' dates. It was just that he couldn't get the date he wanted._

_There was no way Derek could ask Casey to prom. It would be weird and awkward on too many levels. Having to explain his actions to the world and especially Casey would have been too hard. And going to prom with someone else was not an option to him. Sure, girls threw themselves at him and many mentioned that they weren't asked yet, but Derek never asked any of them. None of them were Casey. _

_Besides, Derek could not think of going to prom and seeing Casey dance with someone else. It would have killed him, and Derek didn't want to think of what he would do seeing another guy that close to Casey, so he decided that he was going to stay home. He thought it would be a quiet evening in front of the tv._

_Prom night came and Derek was in his room most of the day. He didn't want to see Casey dressed up for someone else. He did not want to see the sparkle in her eyes when her date came to the door._

_Derek waited to hear the doorbell ring, for Casey's bedroom door to close and finally for the front door to close. He knew that all of these sounds were made by Casey, because the rest of the family decided to go out for the evening. Derek dragged himself out of his room and down the stairs, stopping at the landing, surprised to see what he saw._

_Casey sat on the couch with the remote in her hands. She was wearing a pink tank top and black pajama bottoms, with her hair thrown up in a messy bun. Sitting in front of her on the table was a fresh pizza pie, Derek now knowing that the pizza delivery person was the one to ring the doorbell. Derek didn't know why she wasn't going to prom, but he didn't let the question linger in his mind for long. He was just excited to know that he would be spending prom night with Casey, even if it wasn't at prom._

_Derek and Casey spent the entire night watching movies together. Neither asked why the other wasn't at prom, but neither really cared at all._

Derek finally came across an outfit that he would consider wearing. It was a pair of black pants with a white button down shirt, with ruffles in the front. It came with a black cape and a huge hat with a feather in it. There was also a black mask to complete the costume. Derek brought it to the register and paid for it, finally leaving the mall around 7:30.

By the time Derek got home, Casey was almost finished getting ready. She had on the dress and finished her make up. It was a bit heavier than usual, with green eye shadow to accent the dress, nothing like Casey normally wore. She went through an old trunk in the back of her closet and found a mask that covered the top half of her face, mostly around her eyes. It was from when she was younger, before moving in the Venturi household. The mask was from a school play, where she was a fairy. It was green with a lot of sparkles and matched the dress really well. Looking in the mirror she decided that her costume needed one more thing, her blond wig.

While Casey was finishing getting ready, Derek went to his own room to get ready himself. Putting everything on, he looked at himself in the mirror. It was a decent outfit and the mask covered most of the top part of his face.

Both Derek and Casey were looking in their respective mirrors at their outfits, thinking the same thing. _I look nothing like myself. My eyes are the only things that would give it away that it was me._ Suddenly a sly smirk crept on both of their faces. Something was definitely going to happen that night, they could feel it. The 'what' was still unknown, but they both knew something was going to happen. They both thought that the other never actually looked at them. Casey thought that her blue eyes wouldn't be anything special to Derek, and he thought the same about his brown one's. They didn't know how wrong they were.


	13. Chapter 13

­A/N: I wrote this chapter on Saturday, but the site hasn't let me put any documents on until now. Sorry! And I'm only able to get it up here because I put it into NotePad and then went through the whole thing, italicizing and bolding the right things. Needless to say it took forever, but be happy because I did it for all of you!

Here's a chapter that I'm sure a lot of you have been waiting for. I know the song is really cheesy, but this is how I saw it, so it was how I wrote it. Let me know what you think . . .

Song is " Juliet" by LMNT.

To all of my wonderful reviewers, thanks for getting me over 100. I didn't think it would ever make it this high, never expecting so many great reviews.

Enjoy and review.

Disclaimer: I own nothing

* * *

Chapter 13: A kiss and a goodbye

Casey made it out of the house without Derek noticing. She walked through her back yard, crossing to her neighbors' house and lightly knocking on the back door. Emily opened the door and instantly knew it was Casey. They had been best friends for years, so it wasn't a surprise to Casey that Emily saw right through her costume. After a few pleasantries and apologies for not talking as much since college started, they made their way into the living room where the party was going on.

As Casey was making her way through the party, Derek put on his shoes and left his house through the front door. He made his way across the front yard to the house next door, walking through the open front door. Derek saw many people from high school that he had not seen in a while, making small talk with them. Bouncing from person to person, Derek finally saw his best friend Sam. After a complicated handshake they made up when they were 7, they began talking about their respective college experiences so far.

Both were reliving times past and having a great time with old friends. They completely forgot of the feeling that something was going to happen between the two them.

Casey was enjoying catching up with Emily and hearing of her relationship with her boyfriend. She was really happy that her best friend had found love, especially since the love was returned back to her. Derek also learned that his own friend had found someone at his own college. Sam went on about this girl in his English class, describing every curve of her body and every word she spoke. They were both glad to hear that things worked out for some people, wondering if things would ever work out for themselves.

Making his way into the kitchen, Derek opened the fridge to find a bottle of water. With all of the people in the living room dancing, it was getting really hot in the house. Turning from the fridge, his heart beat sped up as his breath caught in his throat. Casey was standing in front of him in the most amazing green dress he ever laid his eyes on. She looked extraordinary. And although she looked nothing like her self, especially in the blond wig, he knew it was her. He could never mistake her eyes for anyone else's.

Surprised at the stare Casey was receiving from Derek, she couldn't help herself but stare right back. His costume was simple, but on him it was amazing. There was something about him that made the plain black pants and white shirt stand out. She though he looked charming, as if out of a fairy tale. People may not have known it was him right away, but she did. Looking into his eyes, she had no doubts whatsoever.

A million things were going through each of their minds. They didn't know what to do, what to say, wondering if the other knew it was them. Neither made a move initially, both just taking in the view of the other.

Casey finally snapped out of her trance and made her way over to Derek. She had no idea what she was doing or what she had planned on saying. It was like her body was moving without her mind telling it to.

"Hey, I'm Danielle." Immediately Casey thought her ears deceived her. She couldn't believe she lied about her name. Casey didn't think that Derek could tell it was her, but she had no clue as to why she was lying. It just sort of slipped from her lips.

Derek was just as surprised at Casey. He didn't know what was going on, but he figured she couldn't tell it was him either. Derek smiled at her and grabbed her hand. He brought it to his lips and simply stated " Chris."

Neither was worried that the other could tell it was them from their voice. The music was so loud that they were practically shouting.

Handing Casey a bottle of water, Derek leaned on the counter and smiled at her. Looking over her outfit, he would have thought she was a goddess. "So, what are you supposed to be?"

Casey actually had not thought about what her costume was supposed to be. She was just compelled to wear that dress, she didn't really care about having to be something. So Casey said the first thing that came to her mind. " Juliet."

Laughing to himself, Derek responded. "Well, if you're Juliet, then I guess I'm Romeo."

Casey turned completely red, both from blushing and laughing so hard. She couldn't believe that Derek would say that he was Romeo after hearing that she was Juliet. Although she thought that he had no idea who she was, she couldn't help but find his reply endearing and a little upsetting at the same time. _Why would he want to be someone's Romeo . . . he is supposed to be mine._

"Really? Because I thought you were some kind of lame 3 Musketeer." After seeing Derek's mouth drop open, Casey couldn't help but start laughing again. Soon enough, Derek joined in, making his way across the room to her. He always liked how snappy she was with her one-liners.

Derek leaned into Casey, whispering into her ear "Anyway, did anyone ever tell you how beautiful you look in green Danielle?" He couldn't believe he said that. He had told her before that she was beautiful in green. _She has to know it's me now._

Casey couldn't help but blush. Derek was the only person to ever tell her she was beautiful in green. She immediately thought that Derek knew it was her and that he was only playing with her head. Looking up into his eyes, she saw how sincere he was. "Yeah, just once."

Their faces were extremely close, feeling the other's breath on their own skin. Casey stared into Derek's eyes. She saw the way he always looked at her, seeing the emotion she could never pinpoint.

He saw the same look in her eyes, that emotion that he could never decipher. But that look was always in her eyes when she looked at him. For an instance he thought that Casey knew it was Derek, but he quickly dismissed it when she said his 'name'.

"So Chris, having fun at this party?"

"Only for the past 5 minutes."

Happiness was evident on her face, learning that she made Derek have fun. Suddenly, she became very upset. _Why did he have to have so much fun with a stranger? Why can't he have as much fun with me?_

A new song began and Derek immediately knew what song it was. He remembered Lizzie playing it over and over a few years ago. He smiled when he realized that their playful banter had a meaning now. It gave him an excuse to dance with her.

"So, Juliet, can I have this dance?"

After Casey nodded, he grabbed her hand and made it out towards the center of the living room. He knew that the song was a little lame and wasn't the song he wanted to dance to, but it will do. Their conversation in the kitchen and the way he felt seemed to fit perfectly with the lyrics.

**Hey Juliet  
Hey Juliet  
Hey I've been watching you  
Every little thing you do  
Every time I see you dance  
In my homeroom class, makes my heart beat fast  
I've tried to page you twice  
But I see you roll your eyes  
Wish I could make it real  
But your lips are sealed, that ain't no big deal  
'Cause I know you really want me, yeah  
I hear your friends talk about me, yeah  
So why you tryin' to do without me  
When you got me  
Where you want me**

Casey thought about how perfectly the song complimented their conversation a few moments before. It didn't surprise her though, songs always seemed to portray her feelings. As she danced with Derek, he was the only thing she saw. They both wanted a slow song to play so that they could be closer together. They both had an understanding that the song playing was perfect for who they were. It described their situation and their wit. It was cheesy but it was perfect for them.

**Hey Juliet  
I think you're fine  
You really blow my mind  
Maybe someday, you and me can run away  
I just want you to know  
I wanna be your Romeo  
Hey Juliet  
**

Derek spun Casey as the song played. He wanted to be her Romeo. He wanted to dance with her forever. He wanted to tell her how he felt, despite the thoughts he knew everyone would have. Their love would be wrong, it would be a sin in the eyes of the rest of the world. But Derek couldn't care less. He needed her to know everything. _But when would be the right time?_

**Girl you got me on my knees  
Beggin' please, baby please  
Got my best DJ on the radiowaves saying  
'Hey Juliet, why do you do him this way'  
Too far to turn around  
So I'm gonna stand my ground  
Gimme just a little bit of hope  
With a smile or a glance, gimme one more chance **

As they danced, Casey could only think one thing. _When am I going to tell him? When am I going to tell him I want him to be my Romeo?_ Casey knew it was wrong to love her stepbrother. She knew he could never feel the same way about her. But her heart broke everyday she saw him, everyday she looked into his eyes. She couldn't fathom that he would ever feel the same way about her. She thought he only saw her as a friend, maybe a sister, but never as someone he could love. All hope was lost.

**'Cause I know you really want me, yeah  
I hear your friends talk about me, yeah  
So why you tryin' to do without me  
When you got me  
Where you want me **

Derek wished that Casey would reciprocate his feelings. He wanted to have a happy ever after with her. He wanted her to want him, but he thought he never would. He was dancing in front of her, the music illustrating everything inside of him. _She has me, but does she want me? _

**Hey Juliet  
I think you're fine  
You really blow my mind  
Maybe someday, you and me can run away  
I just want you to know  
I wanna be your Romeo  
Hey Juliet **

Casey wanted to lyrics to be coming from Derek's mouth. She wanted him to be saying that he wanted her. She wanted him to love her, even if their love would be frowned upon. She wanted him to be her Romeo.

**I know you really want me  
I hear your friends talk about me  
So why you tryin' to do without me  
When you got me  
Where you want me  
You don't have to say 'forever'  
For us to hang together  
So hear me when I say  
Hey, Hey, Hey Juliet **

Derek wanted to be with her forever. He wanted to see her everyday for the rest of his life. He wanted to have her in his embrace, wake up to her face every morning. He wanted just her.

**Hey Juliet  
I think you're fine  
You really blow my mind  
Maybe someday, you and me can run away  
I just want you to know  
I wanna be your Romeo  
Hey Juliet  
Hey, hey, Juliet **

If he asked, Casey would run away with him in a second. She'd leave everything she cared about because she would be with him. Casey would give anything to know that he felt the same way as her. _If those words every left his lips, I would be with him forever._

By the end of the song, both Casey and Derek decided that they needed to get their feelings out. They needed to let the other know how they felt for so long. Though they both feared rejection, they couldn't stand not knowing anymore. Their love was growing by the day, suffocating both of them. The words were always on the tips of their tongues, wanting to be released.

* * *

As the song ended, Casey's back was to Derek. He leaned in and kissed her shoulder lightly. His lips wanted to linger, but his mind told them to move. It was not the time to declare his love for her, not when she thought he was someone else. He whispered into her ear that he would be getting a drink and that he would be right back.

Making his way across the room, Casey's body seemed to be once again on autopilot. She needed to be near him. His lips sent shivers down her spine with the slightest touch, her body craving more. Her body followed Derek's into the empty kitchen, while her mind told her it was not the right time to say anything.

Turning from the fridge, Derek noticed Casey making her way towards him. Suddenly, Casey reached up and planted her lips onto his. She had no idea what she was doing, it was like her body was working on its own.

The second their lips touched, both minds went numb. It wasn't an amazing kiss, it was very chaste and soft. However, it was the best kiss either of them had ever had, because it was with someone they loved.

Regaining the mind that ran away from her, Casey began to pull away slightly. She was stopped when she felt Derek's arm wrap around her waist, pulling her in closer to him. Even though her mind was racing, she couldn't help but think how perfectly his arm fit around her waist.

Derek deepened the kiss once his mind registered that he was kissing Casey. This was what he wanted for so long. Although he thought that Casey thought she was kissing some other guy, Derek did not want the moment to end.

It wasn't a kiss seen on tv or in the movies. It didn't burn their skin at every touch. The touch from the other did something completely different than either ever thought. The kiss calmed the soul and the mind, but kept the heart racing. It tuned out everything, especially the incessant questions in their minds. The kiss was everything they ever wanted, never expected and now could never be lived without.

For what seemed like eternity, but was actually only a few minutes, both felt bliss. When they finally pulled apart for air, their hands reached up and touched their own respective lips. They missed the warmth of the other's lips on them, the way they perfectly molded onto the others. It was a perfect kiss, their perfect kiss.

They both felt really self conscious all of a sudden. They both put all of their feelings out in that kiss. Casey was afraid that Derek saw right through her, as Derek was afraid of the same thing.

However, they were unaware of the feelings radiating off the other. Casey and Derek were consumed with what they did that they didn't notice the feelings reciprocated back to them. But, that was how it always was with them, they never noticed the other's attempts to show how they felt, because they were internally battling themselves.

Their thoughts were broken when someone bumped into Casey, causing her to fall into Derek. He caught her and looked down into her eyes. They were so open and full of the emotion he always saw, knowing that his own eyes most likely held the same thing. But he couldn't believe that what he saw was love, the emotion in his own eyes. He told himself it had to be something else, but he was unsure what that was.

When Casey regained her balance, she made eye contact with Derek one more time, before they both turned away from each other and left in opposite directions. They couldn't be there anymore. They couldn't look at each other. Casey needed some space to think about what she saw in Derek's eyes. The emotion she saw so many times before. The emotion she told herself had to be something other than love.

* * *

Casey was about to leave the house through the back door when someone called out her name. Turning around, she saw her best friend.

"Hey Case, that was some lip lock you had there." Emily stated, expecting details.

Casey had no idea what to say. It was the best kiss of her life, but she couldn't admit that to Emily. She couldn't admit that she was in love with Derek to her best friend. She wanted to tell Derek and after he rejected her, she would never have to tell another soul.

"I guess I just thought you would finally tell Derek instead of moving on to someone else." Emily obviously didn't know it was Derek who Casey kissed.

"Wha . . . You . . . Huh?" Casey was shocked at Emily's statement. _She knows. _ Casey couldn't get out a single sentence. _How long could Emily have known? Have I ever told her?_ Casey knew she never let out her secret, but how would Emily know then? Casey always thought she hid her feelings very well.

"Case, it's ok. I've known for years. I never wanted to say anything until you decided you wanted to tell me. I always thought you would let it out eventually. I thought that living by yourselves would bring out your true feelings. I never thought that you would get over him without telling him first."

Casey still couldn't bring herself to say anything. Emily knew, she knew for years. _Who else knows? Could _ _Derek__ know? _Casey didn't think that Derek had a clue, he never gave her a reason for her to think that he knew. But then again, neither did Emily.

Emily spoke again, seeing her friend was incapable of speech. "I thought you would tell me when I got over him, but I guess you were afraid. I don't think any less of you and I don't think anyone else will. It wasn't your fault that your mom married George. We can't help who we fall in love with."

Casey finally snapped back. She knew she had to tell him, she had to get it out.

Wrapping Emily into a hug, Casey said "Thanks Em. It really means a lot." Backing away, she started for the door. "I'll let you know how it all works out," she called over her shoulder.

Just before she shut the door she heard Emily shout out, "You better!"

As Casey realized that her best friend knew all along, Derek found his own best friend out on the Davis' front lawn. Sam was drunk, looking around for his keys to the car that wasn't even there. Derek helped Sam into his own jeep, driving towards his house.

When Derek arrived at Sam's house, he helped him to his front door and into the house. Derek dragged his friend up the stairs and into his bedroom. After saying goodnight, Derek walked towards the bedroom door. Before walking out, Sam said something that made Derek stop in his tracks.

"Did you tell Casey yet?"

Derek didn't know what he meant. He knew Sam was drunk, but the way he said it made it sound like Sam knew more than Derek thought he did.

"Did you tell Casey you love her yet?" Sam said, clarifying his first question.

Derek just stared at Sam, who was lying in his bed, looking up at his ceiling. Derek had no idea he knew, he had no idea anyone knew. He thought he was good at hiding his feelings for Casey, but now he knew he was wrong.

"I know man. I knew all along. I would have given you permission, since I dated her and all, but you're Derek. You don't need anyone's permission. I thought you would have told her years ago, but from your silence I can tell you haven't said anything yet."

" Sam, I'm sorry. I know you liked her . . ." Derek didn't really know what to say. He thought that the only person he would ever tell would be Casey. And when he would be rejected, like he knew he would, he would never have to admit it to anyone else.

"Don't be sorry. It's not weird or anything, you only met her when you were 16, only 3 years ago. You can't control it, you can't control love. The heart wants what the heart wants right?"

All Derek could do was nod. His heart wanted Casey, and only Casey, he couldn't help it. He tried to make the feelings go away years ago, but they only grew stronger. "Thanks Sam," he said before walking out of the room.

Halfway down the stairs Derek heard Sam yell "No problem Derek."

Making his way home, Derek knew he was going to tell Casey. He needed to let her know. Even if she broke his heart into a million little pieces, the feelings needed to be let out. Pulling into the driveway, Derek noticed the living room lights out, telling him everyone was either still out or asleep. Walking into the house, he saw something that broke his heart.

Their family picture was sitting on the shelf near the stairs, with the moon light cascading over it. Everyone had such happy smiles on their faces, they were the perfect family.

Derek couldn't ruin it. He couldn't cause problems for his family. He couldn't make his dad and Nora disappointed in him. He couldn't explain to Edwin that he was in love with the one person he shouldn't be in love with. He couldn't see the look on Lizzie face, thinking he was a freak for loving his stepsister. He couldn't think of what his Smarti would say, probably asking if Derek still loved her even though he loved someone else.

It was decided by the time he made it up the stairs. He could never break his family. He would never break their hearts just to save his own. He thought Casey couldn't love him back, so why should he break apart his family just to give himself some peace.

As he made his way down the dark hallway, he passed Casey's door. Looking at it, he said goodbye in his head. He said goodbye to his feelings, letting them know that they would never be released. He was saying goodbye to his happy ending. He was saying goodbye to his Juliet.

Derek had no idea that no more than 30 minutes earlier, Casey came across the same picture. She had the same thoughts that he did. She said the same goodbyes. She cried herself to sleep, trying to lull away her broken heart. She cried, unaware that Derek would shed his own tears that same night, mourning the same thing she did.


	14. Chapter 14

A/N: First . . . I would like to put all of your worries to rest. Reading your reviews (thanks BTW) I saw a pattern. So here's the answer . . . I am a firm believer in happy endings and this story will definitely have a happy ending.

Second . . . I know this chapter is not that good. I had it in my mind, but the end didn't come out exactly as I planned it. It says what needed to be said, but I think it could have been written better. For that I'm sorry. It's the end of the semester and I have a lot of work to do. But the chapter needed to be written, so here it is. If I had more time to work on it, it may have been better, but I wanted to get another chapter out to you guys as fast as possible (to put all the worries to rest).

Third . . . I know things seem repetitive but I am trying to show that Derek and Casey feel the same way, about a lot of things. So Derek will experience it, and then Casey will experience the same thing. They are so much alike and intertwined with the other, that their feelings and thoughts are the same. Sorry if it is too repetitive.

Last . . . I know that the story is kind of long. When I began I only anticipated on about 8-9 chapters. But here we are, up to 14. I think there will probably be about another 3 after this one, but if an idea comes my way, more may be written.

I really appreciate all the phenomenal reviews. And I really hope you all truly like this story.

Enjoy and review.

Disclaimer: I own nothing

* * *

Chapter 14: Waiting

Morning came too soon for both Derek and Casey. They didn't want this day to come. They wanted to live in the past, thinking that their feelings would be able to one day come out. Neither wanted a new day to come, a day that held so much heart break, a day that would be followed by more. Both decided that they hated the sun.

The kiss from the night before still lingered on their lips. Casey still felt the warmth against her, Derek's lips on her own, and his arms wrapped around her waist. Derek still felt the hands around his neck, Casey's tongue in his mouth, and the feel of her heart beating against his chest. Both saw the look in the other's eyes. They wanted to relive the night before over and over again, but they knew it could never happen again.

Derek became irrationally angry, he wanted to put a hole in his wall. He wanted to put several holes in the wall that separated them. His heart was begging him to not care about the rest of the world, about his family. No matter how much his heart begged him, Derek let his brain win. His mind would not let him destroy his family, no matter how much his heart would ache.

Casey wished she wouldn't cry, she willed the tears away. The tears fell though, traveling the same path from the night before. They broke her down to a tearful mess on her floor. Leaning against the wall between them, she told herself that she needed to be strong. Although her heart yearned for Derek, her mind told her she couldn't break apart her family. She had to deal with the heart break.

Wiping the tears from her cheeks, Casey got up from the floor and walked towards her door. At the same time, Derek decided he had to be away from that wall, needing to have some distance from it. They left their rooms at the same time, not noticing the other because their minds were fixated on their own thoughts.

Bam, once again. Neither could believe this was happening again. _I cannot do this anymore,_ they both thought. It was getting to be too much. Derek couldn't help but never want to let Casey go, as Casey never wanted to leave his embrace. She loved that he kept coming to her rescue, but she wished that he would just let her fall. And just touching Casey made Derek go insane, wanting to be there to hold her up forever, but knowing that he had to let her fall sooner or later.

When Casey regained her balance, neither made eye contact, afraid of what their actions would be. Derek could not look into the eyes that haunted his dreams every night and Casey would not allow herself to be swept into his gaze one more time.

After a mumbled thanks, both made their way down the stairs. When they entered the kitchen, they realized it was a lot later than either of them had thought. They saw their parent's sitting at the kitchen table, eating fresh pizza.

"Mom, why are you eating pizza for breakfast?" Casey thought her mom may have lost it, because she would never eat anything other than breakfast food for breakfast.

"Honey, it's almost 12:30. We are already having lunch."

George noticed that both Derek and Casey were still standing in the doorway, looking towards the clock. "Do you guys want to sit down and eat?"

Derek and Casey both moved towards the table. Neither seemed to notice that they were sitting next to each other, until they both reached for the same slice of pizza. Almost immediately, Derek got up and headed towards the cabinet. He grabbed a glass and began to pour himself a cup of water. Derek would normally ask to see if Casey wanted something to drink, but he couldn't talk to her, he could barely look in her direction. If he could, he would have gone up the stairs to shower, but he wasn't quite ready to wash her off of him. _I'm not ready to let her go yet._

Casey wasn't sure what was wrong with Derek. He usually wasn't so jumpy. She was about to get up and walk away when she saw his hand almost touch her own, but he beat her to it. She knew why she couldn't touch him, but she wasn't sure why he seemed to not want to touch her. She pushed the thoughts away though, thinking that he was just really thirsty. Slowly eating her piece of pizza, she realized that she was getting thirsty herself. But she saw Derek was leaning on the counter by the fridge, so she decided she could wait.

A few moments later, they thought that it was rather quiet in the house. Casey was about to say something, but again, Derek beat her to it. "Where are the kids? It's too quiet in the house for them to be here."

As George began to explain that the kids were all out for the day, no one noticed the small smile that crept on Nora's face as she was thinking of the conversation the family had the Thursday before.

* * *

_Nora had just hung up the phone with Casey, learning that her daughter and step-son would be returning home for the first time to attend their neighbor's party that Saturday night. She heard the hope in her daughter's voice when they discussed the dinner that Derek prepared for Casey. Nora had hoped something would come from it, but nothing did. _

_Entering the kitchen, George noticed that Nora looked a little upset. "What's wrong Nora, something happen with Derek and Casey?" He was only asking out of concern, afraid one of them was hurt._

"_No," she said quickly. "But I think that's the problem. They have been there for almost 3 weeks now and nothing."_

_George knew, as well as Nora, that if it were not for them getting married that their children would be together and happy. They had initially agreed on doing nothing. After 3 years they decided to gently push the two together, allowing them to live together on their own. But now, he was pretty sure they would never act on their feelings without a big shove._

"_What can we do? I know it's killing them slowly, but like we said, it's not like we can make them confess their feelings." George wanted his eldest son to be happy, but he didn't know how to help._

_Nora sat quiet for a few minutes. She wanted her children to be as happy as she was, and she knew that no one would ever make Casey as happy as Derek could, and vice versa. _

_Suddenly, Nora thought she had the perfect plan. She told George to go upstairs and get Edwin, Lizzie and Marti for a family meeting._

_The family gathered in the dining room. Nora and George sat next to each other on one sit on the table, as Marti, Lizzie and Edwin sat on the other side, in that order. _

_Nora began, looking at the three children in front of her. "I want to discuss Derek and Casey."_

"_Is this about them loving each other?" Marti asked innocently. _

_Lizzie gently smacked Marti's arm, "What did we tell you about that?"_

"_You said I wasn't allowed to tell Derek and Casey, but you never said anything about Dad and Nora."_

"_Marti . . ." Edwin said, leaning over Lizzie as he glared at his younger sister. Marti let her shoulders drop and looked down into her lap, she knew she did something wrong._

_Both Nora and George's eyes were wide, surprised that their children had any idea about this situation. George finally found his voice again, "Wait . . . you guys know? For how long?"_

_Edwin cocked an eyebrow at his father, "How long have you known dad?"_

_Nora almost chocked, she hadn't realized how much her family observed. She thought that only she and George had any idea about the feelings brewing between the two oldest children. "Lizzie, you knew as well."_

"_Mom, come on. Do you really think that Edwin would find out on his own?"_

"_Hey, we found out together." Edwin said, elbowing Lizzie for making him seem stupid._

_Nora was a little intrigued, "how exactly did you too find out?"_

"_Well, we do live in the same house as them. Anyone could see it. I'm surprised they still don't see it in each other." Edwin nodded in agreement with Lizzie's statement._

_The table grew silent. No one really understood why Derek and Casey didn't see how the other felt. It was so obvious to anyone around them, anyone who saw them. But they both were clueless to the way the other felt._

_The silence was broken by Marti. "It's because they are afraid they will hurt us," she stated like it was known to the world._

_Everyone turned to look at the youngest member of the family. "What do you mean?" Nora asked, seeing as everyone else was too dazed to say anything._

"_They probably think that if they love each other we could no longer be a family. I think that they are scared of what we would think." After a few moments of no one responding, Marti continued. "I want them to love each other. They smile more when they are together. I would be happy for them."_

_No one could seem to say anything. They were all shocked to hear that a 7 year old understood more than any of them ever seemed to. It was so apparent now. Derek and Casey would never make a move because of fear that the family wouldn't approve, because they were supposed to be step-siblings. _

_They were all broken from their thoughts when Marti asked a question. "Don't you want to be happy for them too?"_

"_Yes," escaped all of their lips at the same time. _

"_I have a plan." Nora began, noticing that she had everyone's attention. "They are coming home Saturday to go to the Davis' party. I think that it would be best if Sunday it was only me and George home. I will try to convince them to watch a movie with us, one that I know will bring out some of their feelings." Nora stopped. She looked over at the faces of her family. She saw all of them nod. "And if that doesn't work, then George and I will try and coax them into talking to each other."_

_All agreed and plans were finalized. They three children would leave early Sunday morning, before Derek and Casey would wake up. They would spend time at their friend's houses, leaving their parents to try and break the shell that surrounded their older siblings' hearts.

* * *

_

Casey moved from the table, going up stairs to get dressed, which in turn allowed Derek to finally sit and eat. Casey made her way into her room, looking through her duffel. She would normally have taken a shower, but she wasn't ready. She didn't want to wash Derek off yet, to finally say her last goodbye. As Casey made her way down the stairs, Derek was climbing them, going to his room to get dressed. He walked past her, looking in the other direction, as did she.

When Derek finally made his way back downstairs, he noticed his father, Nora and Casey sitting on the couch in the living room. He went to sit in his chair, noticing that Casey was on the opposite end of the couch, far away from him. He was grateful that she was not near him, he couldn't deal with being able to breathe in her scent.

Nora finally broke the silence, "Do you guys want to watch a movie before you have to leave to go back home?"

_Home,_ they both thought. It was their home, where they would see each other everyday for the next 4 years. They needed to deal with each other and work together to survive all throughout college. Both decided that they would look into transferring soon, so that they wouldn't have to deal with as much heart ache each day, seeing the one they loved but not being able to do anything about it.

After agreeing, Nora placed a DVD into the player. "Love Actually" began playing and both Casey and Derek inwardly groaned. _Of course it had to be a movie about love._

Throughout the movie Nora and George made comments, talking about how amazing it felt to be in love and letting your feelings off your chest. They made a statement about every couple in the movie, analyzing every emotion shown. Nora and George discussed all the different types of love that were displayed in the movie, from friendship to romance.

When the movie finally ended, Derek and Casey had still said nothing. It killed them a little to watch the movie, to feel the love in the air coming from their parents. They couldn't break the love they shared, they couldn't rain on their parade.

Casey was about to speak to Derek for the first time since last night, besides the small thanks she uttered to him this morning. She wanted to go back to their apartment. She was slowly suffocating with all of the talk of love, it was slowly squeezing her heart. But before she could open her mouth to speak a word, her mother cut her off.

"I think the best story line of the movie was between the married couple and the best friend." Nora said, repeating the beginning of the conversation she had practiced with her husband the night before.

"I know, I love that situation. That couple, I think it was Peter and Juliet, seemed like the perfect match." At the mention of the name Juliet, both Derek and Casey winced. That name would haunt them forever. Neither would be able to read the play or watch the movie again without thinking of that night. They knew that whenever the song would play, they were going to change the station.

Nora continued with the planned conversation, "It is very sad though. The best friend is so in love with Juliet, but it is a love that can never be." Nora saw the look on faces of Derek and Casey. Their expressions were so distraught and solemn, like they would never smile again. "What was the friend's name again?"

It was George's turn to continue the conversation, but before he could answer the question, both Derek and Casey answered softly.

"Mark," quietly exited both of their lips. Hearing the other's voice made their heads shoot up, but they refused to look in the other's direction. They knew they couldn't avoid each other forever, but they would try to for as long as possible.

It wasn't a surprise to Derek and Casey that they, themselves, knew the name of the person who had the forbidden love. Each had watched the movie before, several times actually, but always alone. They both felt that the Juliet/Mark relationship was the best in the entire movie. It kind of mirrored their own love. It was unattainable and not approved by the world. Mark could never have a relationship with Juliet, because she was the wife of his best friend. Derek and Casey always felt for the Mark character. He put his heart out on the line, even though he would never have the love he felt returned. Although the other was not married, Derek and Casey thought that the forbidden love was the same as what they had. But neither had the courage to admit their love to the other, neither wanted to admit their feelings and then be able to move on. They always held on to the hope that something may one day happen between them.

But, as of last night, all hope was gone.

George and Nora were shocked that they knew the name of the person. Neither thought that their children had seen the movie or paid enough attention to catch the person's name.

"Yeah . . . so Mark. I really feel bad for him. He is in love with the one person he shouldn't be in love with." George paused, noticing the expressions on Derek and Casey's faces. "But I think that it was nice that he was able to let it out, so that one day he can finally move on. I just wish things worked out differently for him."

"I know what you mean. I would never want to see someone I care about go through so much pain. No matter who it is our children love, I will support them." As Nora said this, she looked over at Casey, who was staring at her mother with disbelief.

"Yeah, so will. I would never hold them back." George said looking over at Derek, who had the same look on his face as Casey had.

Derek couldn't take it anymore. He thought his head was about to explode and his heart was going to break through his chest. He couldn't believe his father seemed to be so understanding. It was like he was speaking about his love for Casey, as if he was giving him permission.

"Derek, do you think we can get going? I really don't want to sit through hours of traffic." Hearing Casey's voice, Derek was brought out of his thoughts.

He just nodded at Casey and followed her up the stairs. When they both entered their respective rooms, they grabbed their things and placed them into their duffels. When Casey was almost done packing, her eyes fell on the wall that was between them. She had the feeling that her mom knew about her secret feelings towards Derek, and it sounded to her that she was giving permission to voice them.

Casey walked over to her closet, just as Derek was walking over to his own. They both found the items they were looking for, the items that they swore the other would never see. _But, maybe tonight I'll show it. I'll show everything and deal with the consequences later._

When Derek turned around to put the drawings into his bag, he saw his father in his doorway. George quickly shut the door and leaned against it, blocking Derek's only escape. There was something that needed to be said and George was going to make sure Derek was going to hear it, knowing that Casey would be hearing the same thing from Nora at the same time.

"You know that the whole family loves you right?" Both parents said. Waiting for a nod from Derek and Casey, they continued. "We want you to be happy. And no matter who makes you happy, we will support you."

Derek and Casey didn't say a thing. They didn't want to put their family through the turmoil of supporting something that was wrong.

As if reading the minds of their children, Nora and George went on with their speeches. "And it's not wrong. We cannot help who we love. I'm sorry if my actions have deterred your own. I fell in love and I wouldn't take that back for anything. I just wish you the same happiness that I found. But no matter what happens, I want you to know that I will not be disappointed in you."

Hearing those words, both Derek and Casey felt the tears in their eyes. It was what they waited so long to hear, but never thought they would. Casey went to her mother and wrapped her into a hug, whispering "I need to get going, Derek's been waiting."

After hearing the same thing from Derek, George and Nora both said, "Longer than you know honey, longer than you know."


	15. Chapter 15

A/N: I really like how this chapter came out, although it took me a long time to write. I'm sorry if there are a lot of mistakes, but I started writing it at 2am and it's now 6:30. I kind of kept getting distracted and am so tired, so it came out slow. Let me know what you think. XXXXX means I think (chapter 1).

. . . Guys . . . 152 reviews . . . tear . . . thanks . . . I never expected so many . . . sniffle . . . thanks . . . love you all . . .

Enjoy and review

Disclaimer: I own nothing

* * *

Chapter 15: The walls crumble

The drive from their parent's house to their apartment was completely silent. Not a single word was uttered. Neither looked at the other, or stole a secret glance. Both minds were running a mile a minute, not focusing on one thing for too long.

George's words echoed in his head, "_I'm sorry if my actions have deterred your own. I fell in love and I wouldn't take that back for anything. I just wish you the same happiness that I found." _Derek's father's actions did deter him from acting on his feelings. But he seemed understanding and apologetic, wanting Derek to be happy and in love.

Derek knew his father gave him the go ahead to be happy, giving him the ability to express his feelings. Derek was also pretty sure that his father knew who would make him happy. Casey MacDonald, his stepsister, would make him happier than any other person in the world ever could. _But how could he be so accepting of this? Dad should be thinking it's not normal, he should be pulling me out of school and as far away from Casey as possible. _But here he was, driving his way back to Toronto, going back to his and Casey's apartment, where they lived, all alone.

_What did that mean? "Longer than you know." Longer than I know what? _Derek couldn't grasp what the four little words could have possible meant. They held so much meaning, he knew his dad intended them to mean something specific, but he couldn't get a hold of what it was. In all actuality, he knew exactly what they meant, but his mind would not let it register, would not let him accept that Casey was waiting for Derek to show his feelings for her, meaning that she had the same feelings for him.

It confused Derek more than anything had ever confused him in his entire life.

Casey kept just as quiet as Derek was on the outside, but on the inside she was screaming. She ran through a million possibilities of what her mother's words could have possible meant, but they all came back to one conclusion. _She knows how I feel, and she's fine with it. She's fine with it. "No matter who it is our children love, I will support them." _And Casey loved Derek, and she was pretty sure that her mother was okay with it. _She wants me to be happy. _

Her happy thoughts ran away from her. She couldn't believe that her mom would be okay with it. _Isn't it supposed to be wrong to her? Shouldn't she be mad and reprimand me?_ Casey thought that she read too much into her mother's words, thinking that she got it all wrong.

But Casey was pretty sure her mother gave her approval, allowing her to be happy, even if it was with Derek Venturi, her stepbrother. Although her mind told her that her mother thought it was wrong, Casey still heard her mother's voice in her head, _"And it's not wrong. We cannot help who we love." _Those words told her so much, gave her so much hope, telling her that she did not upset her mother with her love for Derek.

Alike Derek, the last words that her mother said seemed to haunt her. _"Longer than you know." _It could have meant anything, even though she was sure her mother meant it to be a very definitive sentence. But Casey would not give herself hope, the hope that Derek waited to hear what Casey wanted to say for years, because he wanted to say the same thing.

Finally reaching their destination, Derek and Casey made their way into their apartment. They were both unaware that the other had the same speech said to them, the speech that they couldn't get out of their heads. _They wouldn't be disappointed or do anything to stop them._

Derek immediately went to his room and shut his door. He needed to sort through everything that was going on. So much had happened in 24 hours, so much he wanted to happen for more than 2 and ½ years. But now he was still not sure what to do.

Casey had decided to do the same thing. She was pacing her bedroom, trying to organize her thoughts. The only thing in her life that she was never able to carefully categorize into color coded sections was her feelings for Derek. And after the past 24 hours, she had no idea what she was going to do.

Breaking them away from their thoughts, both Derek and Casey heard a ding from their own cell phones. Casey found her phone first and opened it, noticing she had a text message. Opening it, she saw that it was from her stepbrother, Edwin.

**Hey, sorry we didn't get to say goodbye. Just wanted to tell you that we love you and we understand. Good luck. Love Edwin, Lizzie and Marti.**

Casey stood there looking at her phone in complete shock. _Does everyone know? _There were so many little innuendos in what everyone was telling her that night, telling her they knew. No one besides Emily actually came out and said it, but they all told her in their own way that they knew.

She was sick of her head screaming and the silence in the apartment was slowly driving her crazy. Casey walked over to her stereo and hit the "on" button. It was on some preset station in the area, the first one that she had found when they moved in. When she heard what song was on, she completely froze.

Derek was just closing his phone, after reading the same exact text message that Casey read a few seconds before him. He couldn't believe it was so obvious to everyone around him. He didn't want to think it was obvious to Casey. He didn't want to think that she knew this whole time and that she was trying to let him down easily by standing by and not saying anything.

He was pulled from his thoughts when the quiet apartment erupted in music. It wasn't very loud, but he could hear it nonetheless. The song was loud in his ears because he had heard it so many times before. Listening to where the song began, he stopped thinking and stood still, absorbing the lyrics.

**I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have  
And cannon ball into the water  
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have  
For you I will  
You always want what you can't have  
But I've got to try  
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have  
For you I will  
For you I will  
For you I will  
For you**

The second they heard what song it was, and what part it was up to, their minds were changed. People knew, their family was accepting, there was no turning back. Although they both still thought that they faced rejection and complete heart break, they knew they had to get the past 2 and ½ years off their chests. By the line "But I've got to try," Derek and Casey were rummaging through their bags, looking for the things that would explain everything.

Derek grabbed his drawings and letter and rushed to his closed door. Opening it swiftly, he was surprised to meet eyes with Casey, who was in her own doorway. Without breaking eye contact, they walked the two feet into the hallway, bringing them merely inches apart.

Holding out their respective items, the finally broke eye contact and looked at what the other had in their hand. Casey saw a stack of papers and an envelope. She couldn't make out what was on the pieces of paper, because they were turned over, but she somehow knew that what was on them would change her life. She looked up to give Derek a questioning look, but found he had a look filled with questions on his own face, as he stared at the simple notebook in her hand.

Casey reached out and took the stack of papers, placing the notebook in Derek's hand. She turned to go into her bedroom, hearing Derek's own door shut just as she was closing her door.

* * *

Making her way to her bed, she sat down at the foot of it, crossing her legs underneath her. Slowly, she turned the pile over, so that the envelope was now on the bottom and the papers were now displaying what was on them. Shock took over, she didn't believe what she saw. She didn't believe that it was her own face staring up at her. 

Casey always knew Derek was an amazing artist. She knew he had a style all his own, one that she could always recognize. Derek had always drawn these amazing things, pictures that she always thought he would be famous for. He only drew things that he really cared about.

Looking down at the drawings of herself, Casey thought that she was looking into a mirror. The resemblance was uncanny, it couldn't be anyone else. She was stunned to find them look so much like her, to find every feature of her face perfectly represented. What shocked her most was the piercing blue eyes that stared back at her, the eyes that looked so much like her own.

Turning the first paper over, she noticed it was dated. The date was over two years ago, back during the summer between her sophomore and junior year of high school. She knew exactly what date it was. It was the day after Derek's cousin's wedding.

Placing the first drawing in front of her on the bed, she picked up the next one. It held a similar image as the first. It was primarily black, but alike the first one, the eyes were blue. She again turned it over and noticed the date was a little after the first one. Not wanting to cover the first one, she placed this one besides it.

Casey went page by page, seeing herself in all of them. There were some full body drawings, each in a different pose. But most of them were of her face. They all displayed the same blue eyes. She inspected all of them like she was studying for a test. She studied every mark made by the pen, every stroke that Derek made.

By the time she came across the last drawing, Casey's entire room was filled with papers. She spread them all over the place, trying not to cover any of them. She did not want to stop looking at any of them. They told her so much, told her heart so much. She turned the last one over and noticed that the date was the day before they left for college.

Carefully placing the last picture of herself on the floor besides her, she turned the envelope over. She wasn't sure what to expect. Her heart was pounding, threatening to explode out of her chest. But her mind was still rational, telling her not to get her hopes up. It told her that whatever was inside the envelope would be something telling her this was all a prank, although she was beginning to understand the emotion she always saw in Derek's eyes. Her heart was telling her it was love.

Opening the envelope, she pulled the piece of paper out, unfolded it and began to read. It was dated the same day as the last picture.

**Dear Casey,**

**I honestly don't know if your beautiful eyes will ever read this. I don't know how many letters I have written, I don't know how many I have burned. There is so much that I want to tell you, so much that I want to convey. It is so hard, so hard to try and explain everything that I feel about you. I am not very good with the words, that has always been your specialty.**

**If I ever decide to not burn a letter and give it to you, I plan on giving you all of the drawings I have drawn of you. I would hope that it would be enough to show how I feel. I kind of hope that I will one day have the courage to actually tell you.**

**When I look at the wall that separates us, I am always in a trance. The drawings come out of me automatically when I look at that wall. It's as if I'm on autopilot. I feel like I am sitting there with you, I see your face and my hand moves on its own. I never even realize that I am drawing, or that I even pick up a blue pen to color in your eyes. I don't even know where the blue pen comes from. **

**I guess I have always felt something for you. But, I finally realized it the day that you broke up with Sam. It kills me knowing that he has kissed your perfect lips, touching you in a way that I never will have the privilege to. I pray that one day you will let me, the day that I will feel perfection against my own lips. It drives me crazy when you gnaw at your lower lip, I'm always afraid that you will hurt yourself. **

**There was something in your eyes that day, the eyes that I find I get lost in. People say that the eyes are the windows to the soul. I have tried so many times to find out what you are thinking, to see into your soul. But I only get lost, lost in your perfect blue orbs.**

**I wanted to not care about you, I tried to deny how I felt for a long time. I was only lying to myself. Everything changed at my cousin's wedding. Holding you in my arms, wiping away your tears, I never wanted to let you go. It completely broke my heart to see you cry, I will do anything in my power to never cause you so much pain ever again. I felt that you fit perfectly in my arms, your body molded just right against me. I dream of that day over and over, still feeling the warmth that was coming off of you.**

**I bet you don't even know how absolutely flawless you are. From your luscious dark brown locks to your fabulous body, everything about you amazes me. I find myself drooling when I think about you, when I look at you. But what always gets me are your eyes. I know exactly what you are thinking when I look at them. I see when you find something funny, or when you are truly happy. I adore it when I see your smile reach your eyes. I see them in my dreams, every time I close my own. It's only when you look at me that I have no idea what you are thinking. When our eyes lock, I completely lose myself.**

**It's not only that you are stunningly gorgeous, beauty that cannot be compared. Even goddesses would envy you. It's also your personality that pulled me in. There are so many attributes about you, it's hard to just name a few. You are kind, intelligent, feisty and so passionate. You're open to new things, stubborn about everything, and have a heart of gold. There is not a single thing that I would change about you.**

**You never once gave in to me, you challenged me any chance you got. You also put your heart into everything you do. Whether it's a school project or helping someone you care about, you never give anything but your best. When you interact with the family, I notice how you get carried away, trying to make everything perfect, trying to please everyone. You are not very subtle though, you bluntly state things and always want to get your way. The fact that you organize everything in your life intrigues me, it makes me wonder where I fall in all of your order. **

**I have begun to hate my father, which kills me. If only he didn't marry your mother, if only we weren't stepsiblings, if only. But then I think that I would have never met you. I would have never seen your face, had a conversation with you, gotten to know the perfection that can only be described as Casey MacDonald. And for that, I silently thank him in my mind everyday.**

**I feel the need to thank you. Not only have you made me feel, you also changed me. Before you came into my life, I didn't have a care in the world. I was a womanizer and I regret that. I regret every girl that I ever kissed, because I secretly wish that my first and last kiss was with you. I also didn't care about school. I only did enough work to just get by and barely pass my classes. You pushed me without knowing it. I wanted to be better, get good grades so that I can one day get into a great university, so I can make something of myself. I wonder if you noticed my transformation. **

**I also feel that an apology is in order. I am sorry for those first few months that I was bitterly mean to you. I guess I was trying to cover my feelings, but still trying to be near you at the same time. I would take back all of it if I could. **

**You mean so much to me, you are my muse, my everything. **

**I love you,**

**Derek**

Casey felt the walls around her heart crumble.

* * *

Derek sat down on his bed and stared at the notebook in his hands. He couldn't imagine what the book could possibly hold. He thought it could be almost anything. His worst fears crept into his head. He thought the book contained what Casey really thought about him. He thought it held hateful comments about him, making fun of everything about him. 

Closing his eyes, Derek opened the front cover. Taking a deep breathe, he slowly opened his eyes. Quickly scanning the page, he noticed it was a diary. It didn't have anything girly, the entry didn't start with a "Dear diary", it just started with a date. And he recognized that first date. He knew it very well. It was the day after his cousin's wedding.

His eyes ran over the page, reading every word, absorbing everything Casey wrote. She poured her heart out into this book, Derek could feel it. Seeing his name, his heart almost stopped. At first it was about this person that she cared for, this person that made her heart swell. Then his eyes found his name and he couldn't believe that it was about him.

Quickly turning the page, Derek's eyes hungrily read the entry. His eyes ran over the page with speed he didn't know he had. He was never a fast reader, he would usually have to read something a few times to truly understand it. But he understood and soaked up every word with an insane amount of velocity. The words travel straight to his heart.

Going from entry to entry, Derek's fingers absentmindedly traced the wrinkles in the page, following the path of her tears. It pained him, knowing that Casey would cry while she wrote in the book. It made his heart break, feeling the pain Casey felt. He felt the same pain everyday, keeping his thoughts and feelings to himself.

Reading the entries only once, Derek felt like they were engraved in his head. Every time he saw his name amongst the rest of the words his heart swelled. This was definitely going to be his favorite book, he planned on reading it everyday for the rest of his life.

Derek finally reached the last page. He didn't want it to end, he wished it would go on forever. But he was starting to understand what the emotion in Casey's eyes were, the one he could never decipher before, love. This last entry was dated the day before they left for college.

**It happened again today. I was swept away in my thoughts of him again. He consumes my every thought, turning me into a zombie. I saw a note that he was playing hockey with some friends, so my body took over. I baked him cookies without realizing I was doing it. I couldn't wait to see the look on his face when he would eat them when he got home. I wonder if he likes mine any better than my mom's, I sure hope he does.**

**Mom almost caught me today and I didn't even realize that I had done it. I can't even remember what I was thinking about while I was doing it. When I took the last batch out of the oven, those five letters were staring up at me, the five letters that make the perfect word. D-E-R-E-K. I can't believe I was able to shove all five cookies into my mouth before my mom saw them. **

**Derek. Is there really anything else that I need to say? It's crazy, but he's absolutely perfect. It drives me insane seeing him everyday and not being able to tell him. How am I going to live with him alone? He's gorgeous. I have never seen another man who could compare to him. From his hair that calls to my hands to his perfectly shaped lips. I sometimes have a hard time breathing just thinking about him, let alone seeing him.**

**But those eyes get me every time. I find myself falling over my feet when I look into them. They make my knees weak. Those chocolate brown orbs probe me, I sometime worry if he can see right through me when he looks into my own eyes. I find the sparkle that creeps into them so endearing. I see it a lot when he looks at me, but I know that he must be thinking about something else. I can't help but wish that it's me on Derek's mind when his smile reaches his eyes, making the honey around the iris glow.**

**I feel guilty when I stare at his body. I shouldn't be checking him out, but I can't help it. His toned arms and lean torso makes me want to run my hands all over him. He has really made me love hockey and everything that it has done to his body. He is a complete god. But I honestly think that I would feel that way no matter what he looked like, because it's not only his body that attracts me to him.**

**The relationship between him and Marti is adorable. There is so much love there. He really is a great brother, even to Edwin and Lizzie. He is actually great at everything he does, I wish I had the courage to tell him. I wish I could tell him how he is kind and caring. How he is so sincere, smart and stubborn. He always wants to get his way, refusing to ever be wrong. He is so cocky and he has every right to be.**

**I was used to getting my way before I met Derek. He became my greatest challenge the second I met him. And what can I say, I adore a good challenge. There is this passion in him draws me to him. He always made me fight for what I felt I deserved. He put me in my place time after time. He made me who I am today and I greatly appreciate him for that. **

**The day I realized how I felt still haunts me. I feel terrible that I used Sam, that I kissed him when I was subconsciously thinking of Derek. I may not have known it before, but seeing him barge into the bathroom that day made it all clear. He was who I imagined every time, who I longed for. I wish I had my first kiss with him, with those lips that I see in my dreams. I am jealous of every girl he has ever kissed.**

**Derek makes me feel so comfortable. He is the only person I have ever opened up to about my father. I couldn't believe that I just broke down, and in front of him no less. But I was so thankful that Derek was there. He held me up when I was so low, he brushed my tears away, he was my shoulder to cry on. I wanted to stay in his arms forever. I miss the feeling of our bodies fitting perfectly together, he is the missing piece to my puzzle. I still feel the warmth radiating off of his body.**

**I wish I could tell him how proud of him I am. Everything he does makes me want to tell him how amazed I am. He is so talented. I would have never thought that he would be such an incredible artist, it seems like he surprises me everyday. I really wish I knew what inspires him. He has changed drastically over the last 3 years. He actually cares about his grades, which he picked up so quickly. I sometimes talk to him about the future and I can't help but wonder if I am in it, if I somehow fit into his life. I can't imagine a future without him in it.**

**I wish there wasn't this wall between us, and I mean that both literally and figuratively. The literal wall separates us, it stands in the way. It makes him so close but so far at the same time. I know I have written before that the wall had inspired me, inspired me to pursue writing and everything else in my life. But it's what the wall represents, it's Derek that inspires me to be my best and follow my dreams. The figurative wall is around my heart. I can open up to him and tell him everything. We can talk about almost everything, he just makes me feel so comfortable. But there is one thing that I can never talk to him about, one thing that is completely off limits.**

**The one thing is that XXXXXX I love him.**

And with that, the walls around Derek's heart began to crumble.


	16. Chapter 16

A/N: I don't know how I feel about this chapter. I like the end and their conversation, but I don't know . . . Hope you all like it though.

I would like to thank all of my wonderful reviewers. I love the comments and encouragement. I hope that my story is as good as all of you say it is. On another note, I was going to place something in this A/N, but I decided against it. I didn't want to ruin my story by having something mean in here. If anyone cares, I have decided to place it into my profile. I will remove it when I finish this story. You can message me if you want to know more.

So . . . that means this story is not done yet. There are not very many chapters left though.

I would also like to apologize. I am not from Canada and have never visited. When I wrote about colleges, I just did a search and picked the first 2 I saw. I probably should have done a little more research before I wrote the chapter about it . . . sorry.

Also, I know I didn't thank Laura8881 for the suggestion of "Love Actually" a few chapters ago. So sorry and thanks. Also, if I took a suggestion and didn't thank someone, I'm very sorry. I usually write the chapter in one sitting and don't really remember all the reviews. Don't hate me or think I'm ungrateful:(

Lastly, I have finals next week (have I said I hate college) so I don't know when the next time I will be able to update is. It will probably be sooner than you think because I have dubbed this site my official distraction from school!

Enjoy and review

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

* * *

Chapter 16: Perfect fit

Derek sat on his bed staring at the last three words in front of him. He never thought that three words would mean so much to him. Sure, he heard them before from a lot of people. His father, brother and sister said them to him. Even his stepmom and stepsister Lizzie told him that they loved him before. Hundreds on people in high school told him all the time that they loved him, especially the girls. But he never thought that those three little words would ever come from one Casey MacDonald.

He had hoped day and night that one day she would show any sign of love towards him. But whenever she showed anything at all, Derek always told himself that it was in a brotherly or friendly way, hoping it wasn't brotherly. But after reading her diary, Derek had his prayers answered. Casey loved him, she felt the same way towards him that he felt towards her, and he couldn't wipe the smile off of his face. It was like the weight was lifted off of his shoulders, even though he knew that the weight was on his heart the whole time.

Casey was just as ecstatic about her letter as Derek was about reading Casey's diary. It said so much, showed her that he really did care about her. And the last few words meant more to her than she ever imagined. It wasn't only the words though, it was everything. All of the drawings and every single word in the letter broke the shell that Casey knew was around her heart. She felt that her heart was beating for the first time, like her eyes were seeing things in a new light. Everything was brand new to her, especially the smile on her lips.

During the entire time she loved Derek, she never imagined that he felt the same way. It was something left for her dreams; something she told herself would never come true. Casey always hated the story of Cinderella, thinking that in real life your dreams would never become a reality. But she was sitting in her room, glancing at all of Derek's drawings and looking over his letter, realizing that her one wish was granted. Derek loved her and felt the same way about her that she felt about him.

Making the first move, Derek opened his door, walked to Casey's and opened hers. He was surprised to see that her entire room was covered in his drawings. It wasn't until then that he realized how many he had actually drawn, how many nights he sat at his desk mesmerized by the person currently sitting in front of him. And now, he couldn't be any less mesmerized, because now he knew that she felt the same.

Finding that the only available place to sit without disrupting the papers strewn about her room, Derek sat at the head of her bed, across from where she was sitting at the foot of it. He could tell that she still didn't notice he was in her room, because she was still looking at the few drawings in front of her, as well as clutching the letter in her hand. Derek leaned against the wall and raised his head towards the ceiling, closing his eyes. It was still all sinking in for him, so he figured he wouldn't interrupt it sinking into Casey as well.

Casey finally looked up and saw Derek across from her. He looked so peaceful and happy. His closed eyes made him look like he was dreaming and the smile on his lips made him look like it was a very happy dream. She had to blink a few times to make sure she wasn't imagining him. It all felt too surreal to her, and she didn't want to wake up and find it was all a dream. She eventually pinched herself a few times to make sure she was actually awake.

She noticed that he was gripping her diary closely in his hands. All of those nights suddenly flashed through her head. There were so many nights that she sat in her room, glancing at the wall between them, letting her hand form the words she felt. But there was no more wall, it was just the two of them.

Not exactly knowing how to begin, but knowing that she needed to say something, Casey broke the silence. "Two years . . ." was all that came out of her mouth. She honestly had no idea what to say, so she tried to start by stating a fact.

Breaking away from his peaceful thoughts, Derek moved his head and opened his eyes so that he was staring into Casey's. "Actually, it's been more than two years. Your first entry says it's been more like two and a half. Around the same time as my drawings . . ."

"Same date actually." Casey grabbed the first drawing and handed it to Derek.

Glancing at it, he turned it over and noticed it was dated. "I didn't even know I dated them," he said barely above a whisper, but it was so quiet in the apartment that Casey heard him anyway.

"How could you not have known?" She knew that they were both avoiding the subject at hand, but she couldn't help it. What was contained in their respective hands was very fragile, as if it was a thin sheet of ice on a lake, and she didn't want to chance breaking it.

Derek took the first step onto the ice. "Casey, I can't think when I'm around you. And when I think about you, I have no control over my actions. I have no idea what I'm doing until it's already done. You consume everything." He noticed that Casey looked away. Derek was afraid that she would take it as being something bad, so he continued. "And I wouldn't have it any other way."

Casey felt her heart racing in her chest. She couldn't think of anything to say as a response, so she looked up and got lost in his eyes. She saw the emotion she saw so many times, but now it was very clear what it was. And she was sure that he saw the same thing in her own eyes. It suddenly dawned on her, and she felt like slapping herself.

"You knew it was me, didn't you?"

Derek knew what she was talking about, feeling his cheeks become heated. He slowly nodded and said "Like you knew it was me."

Embarrassment flooded Casey and she looked away from Derek. At the time she didn't think that Derek could have possibly known it was Casey at the party the night before, but seeing his drawings and reading his letter, she knew he knew it was her.

"Don't do that." Hearing Derek, Casey's eyes shot up and she gave him a questioning look. "Don't be embarrassed for doing something I was too afraid to do." That kiss may not have started the events that led them to revealing the secrets that they kept so close, but he didn't want her to think it was a mistake. And even if it was, it was the best mistake that ever happened to him.

After several minutes of silence, both Casey and Derek realized that they were afraid to continue, in fear of saying something wrong or ruining what might happen.

Derek was about to say something, but Casey beat him to it. "Let's play a game . . . I ask you something, you answer it honestly, then you ask me something."

Feeling his mouth drop, Derek knew Casey was meant for him. _We even think the same._ "Can you read minds?" he asked playfully.

"No, we just think the same. And now it's my turn." Casey said in the same tone, sticking her tongue out. She quickly brought it back into her mouth when she remembered the night before. She remembered how amazing Derek tasted. He tasted like perfection. "What did you eat last night, before the party?"

Derek smiled a small smile. "I guess we are still thinking the same. I didn't eat anything since lunch hours before. What did you eat?"

"Nothing," she said sheepishly. _I guess that's just Derek._

"So, I guess that's just how you taste." Derek said as quietly as possible, but the rose color rising in Casey's face told him that she heard. "Your turn," he said, trying not to blush himself.

Thinking for a few seconds, Casey remembered a few weeks ago. "How'd you know tulips?"

"I remembered from when you broke up with Sam and steered clear from red roses. Why did you come to my first game that night? You haven't been to one in years." Pausing for a moment, he said "I'm really sorry by the way, it wasn't your fault."

Casey couldn't help the laugh that escaped her throat. _I guess he never saw me. _"I haven't missed a game in about 2 years."

Realization crossed over Derek's features. "I knew that wig was familiar." This caused another laugh to come from Casey. _I wish I can hear her laugh for the rest of my life._ After waiting for her to regain her breathe, Derek apologized once more for his hurtful comments from years ago.

"Derek, let's not live in the past. What's done is done. Let's just look towards the . . ." Casey stopped herself. She knew she loved Derek and wanted to spend the rest of her life with him, she couldn't see herself with anyone else. And she now knew his feelings towards her. But she wasn't sure how he would react to the word future when they weren't actually together yet.

"Future," Derek said, finishing her sentence. He saw the fear that was in Casey's eyes. He saw that she was afraid that a little word would scare him off. But he was in this for the long haul. Looking into her eyes he saw his future, and he didn't want her to think anything other than that. "It's your turn."

"How did you know what shampoo I used?"

This caused a laugh to come from Derek. "Not only have I lived with you for over 3 years, but haven't you ever wondered why I always seemed to let you use the bathroom first in the morning?"

Casey furrowed her eyebrows. She knew she usually got the bathroom first in the mornings, but she always thought that it was just because Derek liked to sleep in. "Well, why did you let me get the shower first?"

Closing his eyes and breathing in deeply, he could almost smell what he smelt every morning. "Coconuts and apples, it's become my favorite combination." Opening his eyes, he saw the small smile creep onto Casey's lips. "Was your heart beating as fast as mine was in the supermarket that day when I scared that guy away?"

"Lame question and yes. I'm surprised you didn't feel it almost breaking out of my chest. But I didn't feel yours, I think I was too focused on trying to slow my own down."

Shaking his head, he remembered how he was fixated on trying to stop his own from exploding from his chest. "Your turn again."

Biting her lower lip, she was a little afraid of asking her next question. All of her fear left when she heard Derek say in a very calm voice "Just ask it."

Slowly, she asked "Do you think we can make it?"

"I don't know," he lied. He knew that if he was given the chance, Derek would do anything in his power to make it last forever. He would love Casey more than life itself. He would take care of her and protect her until the day he died. He had no doubt in his mind that they would make it.

Casey saw it all in his eyes. "Liar," she stated. Slowly getting off her end of the bed, she carefully collected the drawings that were spread across it. Thinking that she needed to buy a lot of frames, she placed them on her desk and sat down right in front of Derek.

"I can read people very well, and now that I know how you feel, I think I can read you the best. You lied and I know it. You know we can make it, just like I know." She slowly lifted her hand and brought it to his face, caressing his cheek.

Closing his eyes, Derek leaned into Casey's touch. It felt better than the three words at the end of her last entry. "It's my turn," he said. Opening his eyes, Derek asked "What was written before 'I love him'?"

Without hesitating, "I think" came out of Casey's lips. Seeing the look of sadness on Derek's face, Casey continued. "But I crossed them out because I knew it wasn't true."

Derek felt his eyes widen. He couldn't believe that this was a big joke. _Casey doesn't love me and now I made a huge fool out of myself._ Derek began to back away from Casey's hand, but her other hand came up and wrapped around his neck, holding him in place.

Staring into his eyes she saw his panic. "I didn't think, I knew." She saw his eyes begin to soften, recognizing his mistake. "I love you Derek."

Slowing closing the distance between their already close faces, Derek said "I love you too."

Jokingly, Casey rolled her eyes and said "I know." But she was caught off guard when she felt Derek crash his lips into hers. Just the touch of the other's lips sent every thought out of their heads. Only one word ran through their minds, perfection.

And it was, it was absolutely perfect. The way their lips complemented the other's, the way they fit so well together.

Derek was the first to realize what he was doing. But unlike the night before, he felt he was allowed to do something like this now. Softly, he began to move his lips along Casey's, gently pressing them a little harder against hers. Feeling the pressure returned, he felt his heart race.

It was a very slow kiss, not nearly as fast as the one from the night before. Derek didn't mind the pace though, he was just enjoying Casey's presence, knowing that they had the rest of their lives to spend speeding things up. Noticing how soft her lips were, he couldn't help but want to taste them, to see if it was just her or if she was wearing something on her lips. Sliding his tongue across her lips, he was pleasantly surprised to find it was just her lips and that she still tasted just as good as she did the night before. It wasn't something he could describe though, it was a mix of a lot of things. But he chose to name the taste simply 'Casey'.

She wanted him closer to her. She wanted to feel his warmth, the same warmth that she felt the night before. Pulling him to her, Casey felt his arms wrap around her waist, which brought them even closer together. As the kiss deepened from the sigh Casey uttered when Derek's tongue ran across her lips, Casey tasted the same thing from the night before. It was an indescribable taste, like something she never had before. But she did and she knew what it was called, 'Derek'.

Not wanting to break the kiss, but feeling faint from the lack of oxygen, Casey moved away and rested her forehead on Derek's. She hadn't realized that she was now sitting in his lap, but she couldn't help but feel content in his arms. She felt whole and protected, his arms fitting into the angles of her waist. Sighing, she realized what she was feeling, completion.

"Case," Derek whispered.

"Hmm."

"Can you slap me?" Derek asked in an even tone, as if it was nothing.

Pulling her head away from Derek's, she opened her eyes to find his were shut tightly. Swallowing a chuckle at how he looked, she asked "Why would you want me to slap you?"

"I just want to make sure this isn't another dream, one that I have had so many times before."

Bringing her hand to his face again, she lightly pressed her lips to his once again. "If this is a dream, I don't want to wake up."

Slowing opening his right eye, Derek found himself face to face with Casey. He looked down to see that she was indeed in his lap and her arm was really around his neck. Smiling, he placed a small peck on her lips and looked into her eyes. "Me neither."

Getting off of his lap, Casey walked over to her desk and grabbed her purse. She walked back to Derek and pulled him off the bed. "Come on."

"And where are we going?" Derek asked, although he knew that he would go with her anywhere without question.

"We are going on our first date. Let's go get some dinner, I'm starved." As Casey turned to leave, she felt Derek grab her arm.

He turned her around towards him and kissed her passionately, moving a little faster than before. Leaving her breathless, he began to kiss his way across her cheek towards her ear. Placing a small, but shiver worthy kiss on her ear lobe, he whispered "Remind me to call and thank my dad later."

Pushing him off her slightly, she looked up at him. "You got the same talk didn't you?" Not waiting for a response she continued. "I should have known, they both were acting so weird all night. And I bet you got the text message too." Derek was shocked, but he nodded. "How could everyone else know and neither of us ever realize it?"

Placing his arm around her waist, he walked her out of the room towards their front door. "I guess we were both idiots." This caused a small, but playful shove from Casey. Holding her closer to him as they made their way out to his jeep, Derek continued. "I know I was originally afraid of rejection, but then I was afraid of what it would do to our family. But my dad said that he wouldn't be disappointed and said that he wanted me to be happy."

Nodding, hearing exactly what her own mother said to her, "Yup, same conversation. Do you think they practiced it?"

"Knowing our parents, probably." Derek opened the passenger side door for Casey and helped her into her seat.

"Well, aren't you just the perfect gentleman now?"

"Nope, I've wanted to do that for years, it's just ok now." Kissing her softly before closing the door and making his way around the car, Derek sat down and started the car. Sighing, Derek turned to Casey and said "We missed out on a lot of time."

Shaking her head in disagreement, Casey looked at him. "Not really. We got to know each other better. And besides, we're still young and have the rest of our lives."

* * *

Walking into the same diner that they ate at the first night in the area, both knew it would eventually become known as 'their diner'. This time though, Derek slid into the same side as Casey, draping an arm over her shoulder. The act was meant to show her off to the world as his and never wanting to let her go. Now that he had her, he would never do anything to cause her to leave.

During the meal, Casey leaned further into Derek's side. She loved his embrace, loved the way he fit so perfectly around her. It was as if he was made to complete her. Casey never wanted to leave his side, and now that she was there, she thought that she never would. Feeling him around her made her feel whole, and she never wanted to feel incomplete again.

Making their way back to their apartment, it was really late and both had class in the morning. Getting changed and ready for bed, they kissed goodnight and headed to their own rooms. Casey cleaned up her bed and safely placed her drawings away. Climbing into bed, she felt it was enormous. She never realized how little room she took up before. Rolling over, she realized it wasn't that the bed was too big, it was that it was missing something. Or rather someone.

Getting up, she made her way to her door and opened it. Standing in front of her door was a shirtless Derek. Looking over his body, she realized what she was doing. Not being able to look into his eyes she apologized.

Lifting her chin so that she would look at him, Derek gave her a small smile. "It's ok, I don't mind. But I guess you didn't see me doing the same thing." Casey noticed Derek blush as he gestured towards her own outfit. "Honestly, shorts and a tank top, how can I not stare?"

Playfully poking his chest, letting her finger linger a little longer than she normally would, she asked "What do you want Der?"

Now knowing that his nickname was not because she was annoyed he felt a smile form on his face. "Can we sleep together?"

Casey knew he didn't mean it to be dirty, but she was shocked that they really do think the same, because she was going to ask the same thing. Acting shocked, she said "I am not that easy Derek."

Looking dejected but knowing that this was all a game, Derek let his face fall as he said "Yeah I know."

Now Casey lifted his chin with her finger, bringing his face to hers. "And I know you aren't easy too. Now get in my bed, it's missing something. You."

Smiling, Derek followed Casey to her bed. Climbing in behind her, he was facing her back. Wrapping an arm around her waist, he pulled her closer to his body. She felt his bare chest against her back and knew that it was his body heat that made her feel so peaceful. Bending her knees a bit to get into a better position, she felt Derek do the same thing. Casey's body molded into Derek's, leaving no space between them. From their legs to their upper bodies, Derek formed a frame around Casey.

Sighing before feeling her lids close, Casey thought one thing . . . _Perfect fit._

Derek moved his head a little, kissing Casey's bare shoulder before burying his head into her hair. Smelling the sweet smell of coconuts and apples he said one thing before falling into a peaceful sleep. "Perfect fit."


	17. Chapter 17

A/N: I hadn't planned on writing this chapter for a few days but I couldn't help myself, I got so many wonderful reviews. Thanks. As for the chapter, I like it as a whole but I don't know . . . I feel like it could have been better. Hope you all like it though.

It's really late, or really early - depending on how you look at it. Sorry if it isn't up to par or has a lot of mistakes . . .

Enjoy and review

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

* * *

Chapter 17: Addiction

Casey woke up happier than ever the next morning. At some point in the night, she turned over and was now facing Derek. Both of his arms were still wrapped around her and her hands were on his chest. She thought that she had never had a better nights sleep before in her life.

Opening her eyes slowly, she looked over at the clock on her desk across the room. It was way too early to be up. Sighing, she placed her head back on Derek's chest and ran her fingers slowly along his bare arm. Feeling him stir besides her, she stopped moving so that she wouldn't wake him.

Derek felt the movement across his arm and began to wake. He prayed that it was Casey besides him and not a pillow in his arms. Slowly opening his eyes, he saw the top of her head, her long hair spilling over his shoulder. Without realizing what he was doing, he lifted one of his arms and began to run his hand through her hair. Over the years her long dark hair called to his fingers, and now they were tingling as they were running through her soft locks.

Moving her head so her chin rested on his chest, Casey looked into Derek's eyes. "Good morning," she smiled up at him.

Dipping his head slightly, Derek kissed her forehead and whispered, "Yes, yes it is." Waking up to Casey in his arms is something he wanted to do everyday. He had never had a better nights sleep, never felt so warm or peaceful. It was the best morning of his life.

Casey adjusted herself and buried her face into the crook of his neck. Breathing in, she was overpowered by the most intoxicating scent. It was a mixture of Derek's body wash, aftershave and something else. She couldn't put her finger on the last thing, but she decided she liked that smell the most.

"Mmm, you smell good."

Smiling, Derek pulled Casey closer to him. Her head was now against his cheek and her hair was covering half of his face. He as well was hit with a very fascinating scent. It wasn't her normal coconuts and apples, but it was just as good, if not better.

"You too," he said while taking in a deep breath, wanting more of the overwhelming smell that filled his senses.

"Derek," Casey said while pushing off of him a little. "I haven't taken a shower since Saturday morning. I must stink." She felt the blood rush to her face as she realized that she slept so close to him the night before. _He probably thinks I'm gross._

Pulling her back to him, Derek shook his head. "It's the best thing I have ever smelt in my life . . . Better than coconuts and apples." Realizing that he hadn't taken a shower in 2 days either, he spoke again. "And besides, you like the way I smell."

"Yeah, you're point?"

"I haven't showered since Saturday morning too," he said smirking at her.

Burying her head back into his neck from slight embarrassment, she realized that the unknown fragrance was purely Derek. Relishing in his scent once again, Casey decided she didn't care how she smelled, she was just happy that Derek liked it.

Laying together for a little while longer, Derek noticed that Casey made no attempt to get into the shower yet. She had class about an hour before him, so she was usually up much earlier than he needed to be. Groaning, he realized that although the sun was out, it was not shining through the curtains as brightly as it did when he would normally roll out of bed.

"Case, what time is it?" He really didn't want to know, but he thought if it was early enough, he mind be able to get a little more sleep with Casey in his arms before she had to get up.

"Too early," she whined, adjusting herself into a better position.

With her now being able to see Derek's face, she brought a hand up to move his hair from his eyes. Turning slightly so he could get a better look at her, he felt like he couldn't breathe. Casey's eyes looked tired, but they still held this sparkle that Derek felt was engrained into his memory. She looked adorningly at him, making his heart skip a beat. If he ever had any doubts about how she felt about him, he knew all he had to do was look in her eyes. _How could I have not seen it before?_ The love was pouring out of her through her eyes.

Moving his head a little closer, Derek kissed her sweetly on the lips. After a few moments, he moved back and opened his eyes, only to find that Casey's were open as well. "I love you so much Case."

Barely above a whisper, Casey replied was a small smile gracing her lips. "I know, you wear your emotion in your eyes." Leaning in, she captured his lips for only a few seconds. "And I love you too."

Derek pulled her closer to him, turning her over so that they could form the perfect fit from the night before. Casey fell into a state of complete bliss. The love and warmth radiating through her body from Derek made her not want to ever leave the bed. The overpowering sense of happiness and the feel of Derek's breathe against her neck slowly started to drift her back into sleep. Snuggling more into Derek's embrace, her eyes began to close slowly just as her alarm started beeping.

Derek smiled when he heard Casey moan a no as she leaned over and hit the snooze alarm. Pushing her hair off of her shoulder, Derek found that his lips were instantly attracted to the tantalizing skin, kissing anywhere they could. Settling back against him, she felt Derek mumble something into her neck, as he began to kiss his way towards her shoulder.

"What?" Casey managed to choke out through the moans that were making their way out of her mouth.

Stopping for a moment, Derek tore his lips away from the sweet tasting skin in the small area where Casey's neck met her shoulder. "What do you want for breakfast?"

"I didn't know you could make breakfast."

Nipping at her neck, a little out of not being able to control himself and trying to act mad at Casey's lack of faith in him, he didn't expect the soft moan that escaped Casey's lips. Licking the place his teeth just bit into, he wanted to entice the same sound to come out of her. Pleasantly surprised by what little attention could bring, Derek made his way up her neck to her ear, tracing the outside with the tip of his tongue.

Shivering under his touch, Casey wiggled her way out of his grip and turned to face him. As he tried to catch her lips with his, she ducked out of the way, giggling as her lips found his neck. Attaching herself to a particular place that made music to her ears, she began to suck, knowing it would leave a mark. _My mark on my Derek._ Just as she was about to pull away to admire her results, the alarm started beeping again.

This time it was Derek that groaned and hit the alarm. But to Casey's dismay, he got off the bed and pulled Casey off with him. Pulling her into a hug, Derek told her to get into the shower while he made breakfast. Watching him walk out of her room, Casey felt a small frown form on her face. She wished that she was the type of person who was willing to miss class, because she wanted to stay in bed all day with Derek.

A little while later, Casey was back in her room after her shower. Looking through her closet, she found herself looking for something she thought Derek would like. Passing over most of her clothes, she settled on a form fitting hunter green shirt and a black shirt. It wasn't spectacular, but she knew he would like the green.

Making her way into the kitchen, she saw that Derek was still in his pajamas, standing in front of the stove. She quietly snuck up behind him and slipped her arms around his waist, placing feather light kisses across his shirtless back. Feeling him shudder, Casey smiled into her kisses.

Turning around, Derek wrapped his arms around Casey's waist and lifted her slightly, bringing her lips to his. Walking her to the table, he plopped her down into a chair before turning back to the stove. He placed a plate of eggs and bacon in front of her and turned to grab the glass of apple juice from the counter. Grabbing his own plate and drink, he sat down across from her.

Looking up, he noticed the surprised look on Casey's face. Rolling his eyes, Derek began to eat. "I bet you were expecting one of my famous bowls of cereal or amazing toast."

"Actually, yeah I was." Casey finally brought the fork up to her mouth and began to eat. "I don't understand it . . . You can't handle baked chicken but you can make eggs? I didn't even teach you how to make eggs."

"I think that's the point Case." She noticed the slow blush begin to rise in Derek's cheeks. "I'm able to concentrate and pay attention when your mom cooks. But with you, it's a completely different story."

Casey felt herself blushing at Derek's confession. She hadn't realized how much of an effect she had on him. She began to think of the effect he had on her. Just one look in his eyes and she melts, one touch and her knees buckle, and now with just one kiss she's all his. He brings out all of these conflicting yet comforting feelings. She feels lost and found at the same time, she feels like she's drowning yet safely on the sand, she feels like she's floating on cloud nine and well, pretty much just floating on cloud nine.

Derek noticed that Casey was spacing out. She had that look on her face like that night in the kitchen a few weeks before. Derek finally knew what was on her mind that night, like he knew what was on her mind right now . . . him.

Smirking, he grabbed a piece of egg off his plate and threw it at Casey, knocking her from her thoughts. She tried to scowl at him, but she couldn't help the smile from forming on her lips. She grabbed the piece of egg that fell into her lap and threw it back at Derek. He was about to throw it back, but Casey suddenly got up.

"I have to get going or else I will be late." Casey walked out of the kitchen and towards her room. Gathering her books, Casey made her way to the front door. "See you la-"

She was cut off when Derek came up behind her, spun her around and planted his lips on her own. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she pressed her body up against his, making him fall back into the wall. After a few minutes Casey murmured against his lips "I really don't want to leave."

Breaking the kiss reluctantly, Derek leaned his forehead against Casey's. "My Casey doesn't cut class."

Jumping for joy on the inside, Casey cocked an eyebrow and smirked. "Your Casey?"

"Yeah, you have a problem with that?" Derek said before lightly kissing her again.

Looking him in the eye, she shook her head no. She had absolutely no problem being his.

Pulling herself off of him, she kissed his cheek and was about to pull away when Derek wrapped his arm around her. Keeping Casey close, Derek whispered in her ear, "Are you trying to drive me crazy wearing green?"

Completely red, Casey tried to put on her best innocent face and shrugged. Kissing Derek one more time, Casey grabbed her jacket and left the apartment for her first class.

When Casey left, Derek cleaned up the kitchen and made his way to the bathroom to take a shower. Although he was encompassed by coconuts and apples, it wasn't the same anymore. He missed what he smelt that morning. After stepping out and drying himself with the towel, Derek went to the sink to brush his teeth when something caught his eye. Turning his head to get a better look, he saw a rather large hickey forming on neck.

* * *

All through his drawing class, Derek couldn't seem to get Casey off of his mind. He saw her in front of him, felt her lips on his own. He was glad that he was allowed to draw whatever he wanted that day, because he was pretty sure that anything else would somehow turn into Casey. 

Halfway through his class, he realized it would only be a little while longer until he would see Casey again. Thinking about being near Casey made his lips curl into a smile. Unfortunately for him, the dumb blonde from the first day of class thought that the smile was for her.

Making her way over to him, she started snapping her gum while running her finger along his arm. Over the past few weeks he learned her name was Gloria and that she was very interested in him. He had told her numerous times that he had a girlfriend and that he was not interested in her, but she didn't seem to take that as an option. She had told him she will believe it when she sees this supposed girlfriend.

Pushing her off and telling her as nicely as possible to leave him alone, Derek continued his drawing of Casey, seeming to take more time on her lips than he ever had before. They captivated him and he couldn't get them off of his mind. He thought about how they moved when she spoke, how her teeth lightly touched her bottom lip when she said his name. They were the most remarkable lips he had ever laid his eyes on. And it warmed his heart to know that they were all his.

His class ended a little earlier than usual, so he rushed out of the classroom, headed for his next class. Remembering that this class was with Casey, he picked up his pace and made his way across campus towards the lecture halls. Entering the building, he felt himself pushed up against a wall. Thinking it was Casey, he closed his eyes in anticipation of her lips.

"I know you want me," came from a familiar voice close to his ear. But to his disgust, it came from Gloria. He didn't notice her trailing behind him the whole time he was walking to history, as his mind was preoccupied with a certain someone else.

Grabbing her by the shoulders, he pushed her arms length away from his and glared as her. "I thought I told you I was not interested. I am with someone else, someone who's not you."

Shrugging his hands off her shoulders, Gloria stepped a little closer to him and smiled what he thought was supposed to be a sexy smile. It actually made him want to throw up. "I can see it in your eyes Derry, you don't love her. We can just have a little fun, it doesn't have to mean anything. You don't even have to tell that little brunette of yours." It sickened him at the nickname she insisted to call him by. It also sickened him that she thought she knew him. She didn't know how wrong she was about what was in his eyes.

Casey watched the whole scene play out from across the hall. She wasn't worried. She knew Derek loved her and didn't want anything to do with this little slut in front of him. She actually found it quite funny that she couldn't take the hint. Casey saw the disgust in his face and the roll of his eyes.

Taking pity on the one she loved, Casey made her way over to the poor boy cornered by the floozy in front of him. Slipping into the small space between them, Casey grabbed the back of Derek's head and smashed her lips into his. Bringing her other arm up and around his neck, she pushed him back to the wall and brought her body flush against his.

She hadn't realized how much she missed this, how much she missed him. It had barely been 3 and a half hours since she last saw him, but now she thought it had been too long. Darting her tongue out of her mouth, she just needed to taste him. _Mmm, peppermint and Derek._ It was all too intoxicating.

Derek couldn't help but smile into the kiss. Casey was taking control and he loved it. Her lips, tongue, body . . . it was all driving him crazy. He had been daydreaming about this since the second she left the apartment that morning. He didn't realize that his heart was aching for this all day. His lips were throbbing for her succulent lips, begging for them since the last time they had them.

Needing air, the kiss broke and their chests were heaving onto the other's. Opening his eyes to see a pissed off Gloria walk away he smiled at Casey. "Getting even again are we?"

Shaking her head no, Casey tried to regain her breathe. "I think I'm addicted to you Derek Venturi."

Derek grabbed Casey's hips and spun them around, slamming her into the wall that he was just leaning on. Licking his lips, he leaned in and began kissing Casey again. He thought how right she was. Casey was his addiction and he was not planning on ever giving her up.

This kiss was passionate and breathtaking. But whenever one broke for oxygen, the other attacked once again. Thinking his lungs were going to collapse, Derek pulled his lips away and nudged Casey's head out of the way to find her neck. Kissing, sucking, licking, biting . . . Derek couldn't seem to get enough. He decided that she tasted too good, like a child's first piece of chocolate. She was definitely his new favorite snack.

"I wouldn't want you to go through withdrawal," he mumbled into her skin.

Feeling Casey's chest vibrate from the moan she was trying not to let out, Derek began to suck on the spot that she seemed to enjoy the most. "Mmm, Derek," coming from her lips made him suck a little harder.

After a few moments, they heard someone clear their throat. Looking towards the person trying to get their attention, Derek noticed it was one of his teammates. "Class starts in a few minutes Venturi. Wouldn't want you to be late." Motioning to Casey's neck he said with a laugh in his voice, "Nice work by the way."

Looking at Casey's forming hickey, which matched his perfectly, he snickered. "I guess we were still getting even." Seeing the questioning look on her face, he pulled down the collar of his shirt a little to show Casey's hard work.

She leaned up and kissed it lightly. Bringing her face to his ear she whispered, "Are you just copying me or trying to drive me crazy?" Furrowing his eyebrows down at her, she tugged at his shirt. "Green Derek, it really does suit you."


	18. Chapter 18

A/N: Thanks so much for all the reviews. I am still floored by how many I have. I really don't think it deserves more than 200, but I am glad that all of you like it. Seriously, although I'm not a review whore, the words of encouragement mean a lot to me. Thanks!

As for this chapter, I don't really know how I feel about it, but I hope you all like it. I just think it serves its purpose to close some doors.

Enjoy and review

Disclaimer: I own nothing

* * *

Chapter 18: Congratulations

The underlying pent up feelings of years of love boiled over and were finally released that morning. They both felt strangely drawn to the other since the moment they woke up. Hungry in a need of lips, skin, body warmth, anything they could get. And from Casey's bed to the outside of their history class they got it. Years of desire and need were released and by the time their class was over, the immediate requirement for the other was gone, but they knew the fire would always burn without the slightest bit of cooling.

After their history class, Derek and Casey were done with classes for the afternoon. Heading home, _our home_, Derek was amazed. He couldn't believe that less than 48 hours ago they had shared their first kiss, that less than 24 hours ago he threw caution to the wind and showed Casey how he felt. And to Derek's complete surprise, he now held her heart in his hands, as her own hands contained his.

Smiling the entire drive back to their apartment, he relived these past two days over and over again in his head. From the feel of her lips to the warmth of her body from sleeping next to him the night before, he knew he could never get enough. His heart was filled with love for her, and he planned on spending the rest of his life showering her in his love.

Exiting his jeep and going around to her side, he helped her out and found himself once again lost in her eyes. It was all there, everything she said the night before and that morning. Everything and more. Everything she felt for him was being said through her eyes and he couldn't help but feel like he was drowning in emotion. But it was that exact emotion that kept him afloat. He would never grow tired of her eyes. _God, I love her._

Seeing everything that Derek just thought in his eyes, knowing she thought the same exact things, Casey simply smiled. She now knew that she would always know what he wanted to say from one look him his eyes, the eyes she wanted to see for the rest of her life. Leaning up a bit, she lightly kissed his lips. Pulling back just enough to let the air from her mouth brush against his, "Me too."

After throwing their books in their respective rooms, Derek and Casey made their way to the living room and sat on the couch. Silently thanking the landlord for such a small and cozy couch, Casey leaned against Derek while he wrapped an arm around her waist. They were small gestures but held so much meaning. It was happiness, contentment, affection, love. It was perfect, it was them.

Thinking back, words were never needed between them. Over the past few years, they had always felt some sort of connection. They knew when something was wrong or when they were truly happy without a word being muttered. They never let on to knowing though. They just let the other take their time in explaining. Now, it felt like their minds were screaming, and they knew deep down that the other heard it all.

Reaching over to the phone that was sitting on the table, Derek hit the speaker button and dialed the number to the Venturi/MacDonald household. Listening to the ringing, Casey sighed heavily while laying her head against Derek's chest. She knew that no matter what nothing would be able to stand in the way of her heart now, but she still needed to know that she had support and acceptance. It was implied but never verbalized and she needed the words more than anything. A slight tightening of Derek's arm told her that he needed it as well, but that his arm as well as his heart would be there no matter what.

After the third ring, both recognized the sing-song voice of the youngest inhabitant of the house. "Venturi/MacDonald residence."

A smile graced Derek's face. He missed his little sister this weekend, only seeing her in her famous purple princess dress for a few moments at the party, he wished he would have been able to spend more time with her. "Hey Smarti."

"Smerek!" came shrieking through the small holes on the phone. Looking up, Casey saw the smile on Derek. Marti had found her way into his heart which always made Casey a little envious, but she appreciated it at the same time. She made him who he was and she was grateful for the little girl.

After a few seconds of silence, Marti continued in a softer, almost whispered voice. "Did everything work out ok?"

Looking down to find Casey looking back up at him, his eyes twinkled a bit before he placed a kiss on her forehead. "It sure did Smarti."

Small squeals came from the phone before Casey and Derek heard Marti scream for the rest of the family. Hearing footsteps and an eventual 'who is it?' they heard Marti say Derek's name, almost seeing the ear to ear smile on her face.

After a little rustle, they heard the click of the receiver on the other end, letting them know they were now on speaker for the rest of the family to hear. Nora's voice was the first that they heard. "Is Casey there with you Derek?"

"Yeah mom, I'm here." Not knowing what to say next, both Casey and Derek sat in silence waiting for whatever their family threw at them. They were sure there would be questions and inquiries. There had to be at least a few comments, especially from their siblings. But they sat patiently waiting for everything that would come their way.

It was again Nora who was the representative of the family, asking a question that both Derek and Casey found to be too short and simple. "Well?"

"Well . . ." Casey began. She knew what the question was supposed to mean but she couldn't bring herself to answer. It is a sticky situation that they were in and she wasn't about to get herself stuck.

Hearing a small intake of breath from the other side of the line, Casey and Derek braced themselves for the worst. "Well . . . it's about time." This was definitely not what they were expecting to hear. And then after a few seconds of shock, they began to hear the rest of the family exclaiming their congratulations for the two of them.

Feeling confused, Derek finally gained his voice, asking "So that's it?"

"What did you think we were going to do?" George paused, seeming to wait for a response that never came. "This isn't an interrogation son. We just want you to be happy and we saw all along that you would be happy with each other. There really is nothing we can say or do about it."

It was Casey that was utterly confused this time. "Really? No questions or comments or anything?"

"Well, we do have a few things to say."

_Great_, they knew what was going to come next. 'No display of emotions around the rest of the family so it doesn't freak us out' and 'no letting your grades slip, we aren't paying for an apartment for college for alone time.' There would most likely be a 'we won't say we told you so when this doesn't work out.'

Seeing the same expression of concern on Derek's face, Casey stared at the phone sitting on the table. Intertwining her fingers with his, she squeezed slightly letting him know that they would be alright. "Yeah mom, what is it?"

"First, we don't care what you do at your own place, but when you are staying here you will be sleeping in separate rooms." _Ok, that's reasonable, but that was just the first. _"Second, George and I do not want to see grandchildren at least until you graduate, so use protection."

A few 'ewws' were heard from Edwin and Lizzie, while Marti asked what 'protection' was, causing Casey to blush a bit. Not noticing the small pink tint growing in Derek's own cheeks, Casey waiting for the thirds and fourths that she was expecting. After nothing, Casey tried to entice the rest of the conversation out of her mom. "And . . ."

"And . . ." there was a small pause in Nora's voice while she looked to the rest of her family. There faces told her that they didn't care about anything else. Stopping on George's face, he only gave her a shrug, indicating that he didn't have anything else to say to their eldest children. " . . . we love you and just want you to finally be happy."

_What? That's it. Nothing else?_ "Thanks Nora." Smiling down at Casey he began again, "I'm sure we will be."

Goodbyes were said, along with a promise to call and stop by again soon. At last a very heartfelt 'thank you' came from both Derek and Casey, both of which meant it more than anything. It was all they could ever want, the acceptance from their family, and they thanked them wholeheartedly for it.

When the phone was finally hung up, Casey sat up straight and looked over at Derek. His expression matched her own, one filled with absolute awe at how easy that conversation was.

"Well, that went a lot better than expected."

"Besides the whole 'use protection' thing, I think it went really well." With that, Derek's lips lifted a little at the corners as he looked from Casey's eyes to her lips. A mischievous grin spread and Casey couldn't help but laugh, finding the way his eyes flickered when he thought she couldn't see what he really wanted.

Making his way over to Casey, she jumped out of the way just as he tried to kiss her. She rolled her eyes teasingly as he pouted up at her. Not being able to resist his angelic face, she leant down to quickly brush her lips against his, knowing if she stayed any longer it would be hours before she would get off the couch.

Turning towards the phone, she hit the speaker button and dialed a familiar number. Seeing the questioning look on Derek's face, she explained "I need to let Emily know what's going on. She apparently already knew how I felt about you and I told her I would let her know what happened."

Derek nodded, explaining that Sam seemed to know of his own feelings, saying that as soon as she was done with Emily he would give Sam a call.

Sitting next to Derek, she felt his arm once again wrap around her waist. Relishing in the thoughts of perfection that crossed her mind, she heard a familiar voice say "Hello."

"Hey Em, its Casey." She felt the strong arm wrap a little tighter around her waist, before she was pulled into Derek's lap. Trying to stifle the giggle that was tickling the back of her throat, she turned to see a forced innocent look on Derek's face.

"Don't 'Hey Em' me. I want details." _Oh, Emily. You have not changed one bit._

Derek moved the hair off of Casey's shoulder and found the same attraction that was there from that morning. He tried to not move, tried to not taste her sweet skin, but he failed. Lightly kissing her shoulder sent shivers down her body, making him smile that he could still cause so much from such a small amount of attention.

Casey completely forgot that she was still on the phone with Emily. She was enjoying the feeling she was getting from his slight touch. Turning so she could face him, she brought her lips to his. She barely began to place the smallest amount of pressure against him before she heard a voice coming from the phone.

"Well?" _That pesky question._

"Well what?" she said ask she turned away from Derek's face, glaring at the phone.

"Did he feel the same?"

Casey felt Derek turn her face, placing small kisses all over before stopping on her lips. "Yeah Emily, I feel the same."

"Derek?" There was a small pause where Casey couldn't help herself from smiling. Emily spread the most gossip in high school, so she knew it wouldn't take long before most of their graduating class would know about them. Another thought crept into her head that made her smile falter. _What about his reputation? What people thought of him was so important to him in high school. Does he want them to know?_

Derek saw the look in her eyes. He noticed her smile fade as her eyes spoke to him. He saw the questions and doubt fill her. Lifting her chin a little, he place a very chaste but passionate kiss on her lips. Looking into his eyes, Casey saw them tell her one thing. 'I don't care anymore.'

"I guess it's about time the two of you got together."

Pulling Casey closer, he whispered "I really like the people we surround ourselves with." Casey nodded and let herself fall completely against him, loving the feel of his muscles under her body. "And I really love you."

Blushing slightly, Casey bit her bottom lip as she backed away from him to look at his face. Shaking his head, he leaned in and ran his tongue across Casey's bottom lip and the teeth biting into it. _Mmm, my all time favorite snack. _After she released her lip he whispered, "Don't do that, I don't want them to get hurt. They . . . you are too precious to get hurt."

Before Casey could respond, they both heard Emily speak again. "Are you guys still there?"

Rolling her eyes, causing a laugh from Derek, Casey turned to the phone to reply. "Yeah we're still here Em."

"So . . . how was it?"

Furrowing her eyebrows she turned to see Derek's own questioning face. Shrugging, Derek said "How was what?"

Listening intently, they heard Emily take a deep breath. They knew that for Emily to hold back it must have been something important. "How was the sex?"

Derek noticed that his cheeks became really hot again and that Casey became many shades darker than she normally was. If it wasn't a weird conversation, Derek would have told her how cute she was when she blushed. He found it endearing that his perfect little Casey was able to get flustered over things. Catching her when she was off her guard and making her face contort into the funniest of faces always made him was to kiss her right then and there. This would have been the first opportunity to kiss her while she was at a loss, but he knew it was inappropriate.

Casey couldn't believe she was just asked that. _What is it with everyone talking about my sex life._ She couldn't turn and look at Derek, knowing that he would be able to see the embarrassment in her eyes. He was able to see her profile though, so she already knew that he could see her blushing. It wasn't like they weren't going to eventually have that conversation, it was just that it hadn't even been a day yet since they got together.

She was a virgin, and she knew that Derek was one as well. They had a conversation about it a few years ago and they had the same thoughts on the subject matter at hand.

* * *

_No one else was home, seeing as their parents decided it would be nice to take the younger children to the new theme park that opened up in the next town. Casey wasn't feeling well and said she was going to stay home. At this time, Derek and Casey stopped fighting and were slowly becoming good friends, so he offered to stay home and make sure she would be ok._

_After making some soup for Casey, Derek suggested they watch a movie. Settling for something neither of them had seen before that was playing on tv, they sat in the living room. _

_Finishing her bowl of soup, she placed it on the table in front of her and settled into a better position on the couch, not watching what was on the tv for a few minutes. Unaware of the fact that Derek was staring at her and not paying attention to the movie either, she looked up and noticed that there was a very explicit sex scene on._

_Clearing her throat, Derek snapped out of his trance and noticed the same thing she noticed. It wasn't that he was uncomfortable with something like this. He was a guy after all and he had seen his fair share of pornos, which were a lot more graphic than what was in the movie. But something about watching it in front of Casey made him nervous. _

_Looking over to Derek to try and gauge his reaction to the sudden turn in the movie's events, she saw that his cheeks turned a shade or two pinker than they normally were._

"_Derek Venturi, are you blushing at a sex scene?"_

"_I . . . um . . . well . . ." Derek couldn't seem to say anything. His reputation at his school said that he was a male whore and although he didn't want Casey to think that, he didn't want the school to find out that he wasn't as hardcore as people made him seem to be._

"_Is it true? Has Derek Venturi never had sex before?" Casey was praying that he hadn't. She wanted to think that he wasn't the playboy people thought he was, he hadn't even had a girl to the house in over a year. And she had already gotten to see the other side of Derek, the side that he shut out to their fellow students. And she knew it was sincere, she could always tell when he lied to her, which he rarely did. She always saw it in his eyes._

_Derek tried to look away from her gaze, but her eyes always pulled him in. And whenever he found himself stuck in her gaze he couldn't stop himself from telling her the truth. "No, I haven't," he said sheepishly before finally looking away from her and towards the floor._

_Casey laughed. It wasn't that she thought it was funny or anything. She was just glad that he opened up to her about something so personal. She also mentally placed another check on the list in her head. So far, it was about a million on the good side of loving him, while the bad side was still empty._

_Derek grew angry. The one person he ever told the truth to was laughing in his face. And it wasn't like she was just anyone. "Is it really that funny that I decided to wait for true love? It's not like I plan on waiting until I'm married. I just want to wait until I find the right person." _And here she is laughing in my face.

_That sobered Casey up quick. She had felt the same way. She wanted to wait until she fell in love. She wanted to wait until she felt completely comfortable with someone. She wanted to wait for Derek. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean it to make fun of you. I, uh, I guess I just thought it was funny that we both want to same thing."_

_Derek's mouth dropped open at this. He was pretty sure that she and Sam had sex before. Although Derek never allowed the conversation to go beyond anything more than 'So me and Casey', he thought that they definitely had done it. And to be honest, it killed him a little inside._

_As if reading his mind, Casey continued "and no, I did not have sex with Sam. It didn't feel right with him. I never got past kissing him."

* * *

_

"We, uh, I . . . um . . ." Casey was flabbergasted. It was such a personal question. _What the hell does Emily think of me, it hasn't even been 2 days since I saw her at the party? _Casey also didn't know what to say. She was waiting for Derek this whole time, she was always waiting for him. But it had only been a few hours since they admitted their feelings for the other.

Sensing Casey stiffen against him, Derek decided to help Casey out. She was speechless and he knew that with every passing second she became more and more distressed. "Casey and I haven't had sex yet Em." Feeling Casey relax he continued, "I know I waited for someone special, and now that I found her, I don't mind how long it takes."

Casey finally found the inner strength to face Derek. Finding his eyes with her own, all she saw was sincerity. Nodding slowly, he silently told her that he meant what he said. There would be absolutely no pressure.

"Aww. That's the sweetest thing I have ever heard." Smiling, Casey nodded her head to show Derek that she agreed with Emily. "Derek, you should really have a conversation with Trevor sometime. Maybe we can visit you guys and the four of us can all hang out."

Not taking his eyes off of Casey's, he agreed and told Emily that they will call her up the next weekend and plan something. After a few short goodbyes, Derek and Casey heard the dial tone coming from the speaker on the phone. Reaching past Casey, but still keeping her eyes locked with his own, he hit the button to turn off the phone. Leaning back on the couch, he kept Casey close to him.

"I meant everything I said. As long I have you near me I will be happy for the rest of my life. I have no problem waiting forever."

Blinking, the unshed tears that developed in her eyes began to fall down her cheeks. She felt Derek's hand come up and gently brush them away. She knew everything he was saying was true. She also knew all of it without him having to say any of it. The had gotten so close over the past few years that Casey knew he would never push her to do anything that she was not ready for, he would never do anything to intentionally hurt her.

"I know. And if it's possible, I think I love you even more."

"As long as you know that I love you more."

She rolled her eyes at him but the smile on her lips never left, "Are we actually having this conversation Derek?"

"Yup, and you do realize that you are continuing it."

Noticing his eyes dart from her eyes to her lips for about the hundredth time that day, she said "Don't get any ideas Derek. You still have to call Sam."

Reaching into his pocket he grabbed his cell phone and quickly began to hit the keys. After about a minute of rapid tapping, he closed his phone and tossed it on the table.

"What did you do?"

"Sent Sam a text message. I told him thanks and that we are together." Licking his lips, Casey knew what was coming.

Although she foresaw their lips colliding, she still couldn't believe the effect his kisses had on her, which was the same with him. They fell into peaceful bliss, every thought left their minds. They were only focused on the other and they wished they could stay like that for the rest of their lives . . . Together on the couch without a care in the world.

Neither heard Derek's phone make a small sound, receiving a simple message from Sam saying "Congratulations."


	19. Chapter 19

A/N: This is another one of those chapters that I had planned from the beginning. It came out exactly the way I planned. I hope you all like it.

This chapter is crazy long, a little more than 12 pages. I was thinking of separating it into 2 chapters, but I decided not to be mean. And besides, I would wind up putting up the next chapter a few minutes after I put up the first.

Songs: "For you I will" by Teddy Geiger and "I knew I loved you" by Savage Garden

Enjoy and review

Disclaimer: I own nothing

* * *

Chapter 19: Way with words

"I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE!" Casey screamed in Derek's direction. She couldn't bring herself to look at him. She didn't want to cry. Not yet anyway.

She turned away from him and walked over to the entrance of their apartment. Casey grabbed the keys to Derek's jeep, their only form of transportation, and slammed the front door shut behind her. She had to get out of there before she broke down.

It had been too much to handle and today was the last straw.

Casey made her way to his jeep and climbed into the driver's side. After turning it on and pulling away from the parking spot, she began think of where to she could go. Subconsciously, she knew exactly where she would end up, but her brain ran through several possibilities.

The library was not an option. She had been out of college for a little under a year now. There would be nothing for her to do there. She could probably sit at a table and read some random book, but she knew she would not be able to concentrate.

Emily's house was also not an option. She had married her high school sweet heart Trevor about 2 years after they all graduated high school. Seeing a happy couple was not in Casey's plans for the day. Also, anywhere with happy people was out, so she threw her thoughts of going to the mall out of her head.

Noticing the familiar scenery around her, Casey realized where she was headed. After a quick right and then a left a few blocks later, Casey pulled into the driveway and killed the engine. She looked up at the large house to her left and let out a sigh. She should have known she would have ended up here. _Where else would I have gone?_

Making her way up the steps to the Venturi/MacDonald front door, Casey was glad that their parents allowed her and Derek to keep their old keys. George and Nora told them that they were welcomed back anytime, that it was still their home so they should keep their keys, so they wouldn't go to waste sitting in some drawer somewhere.

Making her way into the house, she completely forgot that no one would be there. Edwin and Lizzie would be graduating high school in about two months, so during their spring break from school, her mom suggested that they take a family vacation. Casey wanted to go but Derek had said he was busy with work, so they stayed home.

Without knowingly walking up the stairs, Casey found herself in front of her old bedroom door. She slowly opened it and was hit with a thousand memories. The time when she first moved into the room, after there was a huge fight about her needing more space than the pathetically small room that they expected her to share with Lizzie. Then there was the time that Edwin, Lizzie and Marti came in and wanted to discuss what they should do for Derek's 17th birthday. She didn't understand at the time why they would go to her for advice, not understanding what they meant when they said that she knew him more than any of them did. Of course, Marti knew him, but her suggestion of a kitten as a gift was ignored. Finally, she remembered the time during one of their vacations that Derek and Casey were caught making out on her bed by George and Nora. Then they were given the 'talk', but halfway through it George asked if he was wasting his and Nora's time. The embarrassed look on Casey's face and the happy reminiscent look on Derek's told their parents they didn't need the 'talk' after all, it was too late.

_Derek_, Casey thought with both disgust and love. She couldn't comprehend what was wrong with him lately. It had been almost 5 years since they admitted their feelings and got together. 5 years without a single argument other than what they wanted to eat for dinner. But this past week had been completely different and Casey couldn't help but feel distressed, depressed and heartbroken.

Slumping against the wall, 'that wall', Casey knew that she wouldn't be able to look at it. This wall that was supporting her now had seemed to support her for so many years. _7 years_ she thought, _7 years I have loved him._ But it felt like yesterday to her. There had never been a dull day since then. And since they got together, her life seemed like it was a fairytale. She got her Romeo.

College was the best years of their lives. They fully enjoyed them, and it was probably because they were finally together. Casey spent a few hours sitting against the wall thinking about the 4 years that they spent in college. There was a smile on her lips the whole time she was thinking about the times they spent together. Nights studying, weekends relaxing, holidays celebrated. It was all so perfect.

And she remembered that it was within their first few months of college that they both realized the careers they decided to pursue. Casey decided she wanted to become an English teacher. She wanted to inspire those that were younger than her and make them enjoy reading and writing as much as she did. And after Derek's drawing class during their freshman year, Derek too realized that he wanted to teach. He wanted to mold young minds and instill the importance of the arts within them.

Knowing their dreams early on, Derek and Casey properly chose how to spend their time in school. Taking as many classes during the school year along with summer courses, they were able to graduate earlier than they normally would have with the extra classes they needed to take in teaching. So, after 4 years of studying constantly, Derek and Casey graduated with degrees that would allow them to teach in their respective subjects.

After they graduated, Casey and Derek moved into an apartment together near their family, about a half hour from the Venturi/MacDonald household. Both Derek and Casey applied to work in schools in the area. Casey was offered a substitute teaching job at the nearby middle school, which called her a few times a week. Derek was not offered anything because the schools in the area had very small art budgets, so there were only a few classes. However, both worked at the local community center, which was where they made most of their money.

But Casey's smile began to falter as she thought of the events of the past week. She began to shake against the wall, as the tears trailed her cheeks.

They were so happy together. There wasn't a day that went by that she wasn't told that she was loved, not a day that she didn't feel it, see it in his eyes. And she still felt and saw it, even throughout this week. But there was something different.

Derek avoided Casey. He would be doing something but suddenly stop when Casey would enter the room. She would ask what he was doing, out of curiosity. She didn't think anything wrong of it, they never kept secrets from each other. But he would tell her it was nothing or make up some ridiculous lie. He wouldn't look into her eyes for a few minutes, as if knowing that she would see what he was doing. Casey knew he was hiding something.

But the second he would look up she saw it, she saw the love that he had for her. But she knew what he was doing, he was hiding whatever he was doing at the time into the back of his mind so she wouldn't see it. He masked it with his love for her and it frustrated Casey to no end.

The first time it happened, she let it go. The second time, she dismissed it but a few unsettling thoughts entered her head. The next time, she thought he was having an affair. She silently cursed him and told herself she would get down to whatever it was that Derek was up to. But when she looked into his deep brown eyes filled with love, she could feel that the love was only for her so she quickly got rid of her disturbing thoughts.

But today Casey had enough.

* * *

_Casey entered the apartment that day with a huge smile on her face and feeling that a weight was lifted off her shoulders. She picked up the mail on her way home from the store and noticed a letter from a middle school in Toronto. She immediately recognized it as one of the schools she applied to for a full time teaching position. It was actually the school she wanted to work at the most, because they had a huge art program and she thought that with Derek's talent he could get a job there as well._

_It wasn't that Casey and Derek weren't living well. They both worked at the community center and Casey was a substitute teacher a few days a week. So, they didn't have any money problems and were living quite comfortably in their one bedroom apartment. Recently, Derek even sold a few of his paintings to a magazine and was paid fairly well for them. He also was asked if he was willing to create other images when it was needed and after he agreed, Derek was placed on the payroll of the magazine._

_Although she was extremely content with where she was in life, Casey couldn't help but want to go further. She wanted a full time job. She wanted to buy a house. She wanted to start a family. She wanted to begin the next chapter of her life._

_Upon seeing the envelope, Casey dropped the bags she was carrying onto the floor in the hallway. She tore the envelope open and began to read the first sheet of paper. Casey's application and resume was looked over and approved, she was offered a 6th grade creative writing teaching position._

_Picking up the bags, Casey sprinted down the hall to her apartment and quickly unlocked the door. "Honey, I'm home."_

"_I'm in the kitchen Case."_

_Casey dropped her purse and Derek's keys to the jeep on the table near the front door. She began to walk towards the kitchen with the bags from the store and the mail in her hands. She found Derek standing near the window, looking away from her while he was shoving something into his pocket. As soon as Casey's mind began to wander, she told herself not to worry about whatever Derek has been up to this past week, she didn't want it to ruin her day._

_When Derek finally turned around, he noticed a huge smile on Casey's face. He was silently praying that she didn't see what he was just doing. Dismissing the thoughts that entered his head quickly, he walked over to Casey and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her closer to him. After 5 years, he was till amazed at how perfect she fit in his arms._

_Placing a small kiss on Casey lips, Derek asked "And why are you all happy?"_

_Casey turned and picked up the envelope from the table. She handed it to Derek and turned to put the groceries away. Derek sat down and began to read. When he was done he was about to congratulate Casey but something ran through his head. Making up his mind, he thought _I'm so sorry Casey.

"_I still don't understand why you are so happy."_

_The eggs fell out of her hands and hit the floor. Casey turned around slowly and faced Derek. "What?"_

"_I don't understand why you are so happy? It's not like you are going to take the job." _

_Her mouth dropped. They spoke about this before. Derek knew exactly where Casey applied to. He knew that this was where she really wanted to work. He never voiced a complaint. She couldn't understand why he would now._

"_Of course I am going to take the job Derek. This is my dream job."_

_Derek felt bad, he really did, but he continued. "I figured you wouldn't since we aren't moving."_

_Casey became extremely angry. She would have understood if there was something keeping him here, but there was nothing. He didn't have a full time job, he didn't play hockey anymore since he broke his wrist during their junior year in college, he didn't have anything holding him here._

_Then her mind traveled into the territory that she told herself was impossible. "Are you seeing someone?"_

_This time Derek's mouth dropped. "Besides you?"_

"_Yes Derek, besides me. You have been avoiding me all week. You never look at me when I ask you what you have been doing. You are keeping secrets. Are you cheating on me?" Casey was walking towards Derek the entire time, screaming by the time she asked her question._

"_Are you crazy? Why the hell would I cheat on you? You know I love you and would never do anything like that. I just don't want to move." Derek screamed back into Casey's face._

"_Why don't you want to move then? What's keeping you here?"_

_Derek blurted the first thing that came to him. "My job."_

_At first, Casey was willing to accept this as an excuse. She knew that she couldn't expect him to just give up his job just so that she could have her dream one. Then it hit her. "What job? The community center isn't a real job."_

_Again, Derek blurted the first thing out. "The one with the magazine." He knew he was an idiot._

"_Do you really expect me to believe that? You mail in your stuff. The headquarters isn't even in the area. It's closer to Toronto than here." Casey was pissed. She knew he was making up his excuses. She wanted to cry, but she wouldn't. She hadn't cried sad tears in years. She hadn't cried sad tears for Derek in 5 years._

"_Look Casey, I just don't want to move. You can take the job if you want but I'm not going."_

What?_ "What?" Casey could not believe that just came out of Derek's mouth. "It's been almost 5 years Derek. 5 years and this is our first real fight. And what now? You want to break up?"_

_Derek couldn't breathe. He didn't know what he would do if he broke up with Casey. It would kill him. In a quieter voice than either of them had been using, Derek began while he walked closer to Casey. "Of course not Casey. You are my world. I would never not want to be with you. I love you so much."_

_Allowing Derek to wrap his arms around her, Casey leaned her head on his shoulder. "Then why Derek? Why don't you want to move?"_

"_I just don't Casey."_

_She was sick of that excuse. She pushed him away from her and Derek could see the anger in her eyes. "Why are you keeping secrets from me?"_

_Derek was afraid she could see it in his eyes, so he turned to look at the floor. "I'm not keeping secrets."_

"_Liar. I can see it in your eyes. And I can feel it when you don't look in my eyes." Casey was furious. She had enough. Derek was keeping things from her and she was sick of it. She loved him with all of her heart and she knew he loved her as well. But she never thought that they would keep anything from each other ever again, not since the secrets they kept from each other years ago. Not since their hidden feelings for one another. _

_Casey looked up to find that Derek was still not looking at her, so she got more enraged. She looked away from him. "I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE!" Casey screamed in Derek's direction. She couldn't bring herself to look at him. She didn't want to cry. Not yet anyway._

* * *

Slumped against the wall, Casey sat there sobbing for a long time. She figured it had been hours because light was no longer floating in through the window. Pulling herself off the floor, Casey walked over to the window and noticed that it was getting dark out.

She didn't want to drive home in complete darkness, so she violently wiped the tears from her eyes, not wanting to shed another for Derek. She walked down the stairs and opened the door. Making sure it was locked behind her, Casey made her way over to the jeep and got into the driver's seat, turned it on and backed out of the driveway.

Casey knew she could have slept in her old bedroom, it hadn't been changed since she left for college. But she didn't want to have to sleep there. She didn't want to fight with Derek. She didn't want to have to avoid him because he was avoiding her.

So, she decided to go back to her apartment, the apartment that she shared with the love of her life. She wasn't sure if she was going to talk to him yet. She knew she wanted to talk about what was going on with him, she wanted to know what he has been up to. But she didn't want to yell anymore. She didn't want to say something she was going to regret and she didn't want to hear anything else that would break her heart.

The love between them had been so pure over the years. It was given and accepted freely. It was overpowering and stabilizing. Casey felt like she was drowning in the love Derek gave her and she never wanted anything else.

But this past week came out of no where. She couldn't understand what it was that made Derek so distant. He never kept anything from Casey, he told her everything. She knew it had to be important for him to keep it a secret, but she wanted, no needed to know what it was. She was terrified it would affect her, affect them, and she knew she wouldn't be able to live without him. It would kill her.

When Casey finally pulled up in front of her apartment building, she was a lot calmer than when she left hours ago. She decided that she would ask Derek for answers. She would explain that whatever it was that they would be able to work through it. That he should and could tell her anything. She would understand and would never love him any less.

She finally reached their front door, unlocked it, and walked inside. When she entered, she heard music come from somewhere in the apartment.

**Wondering the streets, in a world underneath it all  
Nothing seems to be, nothing tastes as sweet  
As what I can't have  
Like you and the way that you're twisting your hair round your finger  
Tonight I'm not afraid to tell you  
What I feel about you.**

She rolled her eyes as she turned to lock the door behind her and placed the keys back on the table next to the door. _He thinks he can apologize by playing our song. _When she turned around she gasped.

**I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have  
and cannon ball into the water  
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have  
For you I will  
For you I will**

The living room was dimly light by a few candles throughout the room. Casey noticed a vase full of tulips on the table in front of the couch. She began to walk towards them when she heard a crunch under her shoe. Looking down, she noticed a tulip on the floor. Then her eyes moved a little and she saw a trail on tulips forming a path towards the hallway.

**Forgive me if I st-stutter  
From all of the clutter in my head  
Cuz I could fall asleep in those eyes  
Like a water bed  
Do I seem familiar, I've crossed you in hallways  
a thousand times, no more camouflage  
I want to be exposed, and not be afraid to fall.**

Casey bent down and pick up the flower she just stepped on. She then proceeded to follow the trail left for her, picking up each flower on the way. After all the flowers were picked up, she was in front of the closed bedroom door. She then noticed that the music was coming from inside the room. Opening the door, she was shocked by the sight in front of her and the tulips fell from her hands to her feet.

**I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have  
And cannon ball into the water  
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have  
For you I will  
You always want what you can't have  
But I've got to try  
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have  
For you I will  
For you I will  
For you I will  
For you**

Derek was standing in front of their bed, dressed in a nice pair of black pants and in a hunter green button down shirt. Casey's first thoughts were of how good he looked. She then noticed that there a lot of little candles throughout the room to light it up. Then she noticed that there were as many tulips that there were candles. They were on the floor, dresser, bed, everywhere.

Finally, she noticed the papers in Derek's hands. The first one simply said

- **I'm Sorry** -

**If I could dim the lights in the mall  
And create a mood I would  
Shout out your name so it echoes in every room  
I would**

Casey watched Derek drop the first sheet, revealing the next.

- **I never meant to hurt you** -

Casey looked up to see that Derek was staring into her eyes. She saw that he was sorry, that he really didn't want to hurt her. She felt his love flow across the distance between them. But she saw something else in his eyes and she was sure that he knew she could see it. However, she had no idea what it was yet.

**That's what I'd do,  
That's what I'd do  
That's what I'd do  
To get through to you **

Noticing the paper fall, Casey brought her eyes back down to the papers in Derek's hands.

- **And of course I would move with you  
I'd follow you anywhere** -

**I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have  
And cannon ball into the water  
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have  
For you I will  
You always want what you can't have  
But I've got to try  
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have  
For you I will  
For you I will  
For you I will  
For you I will**

- **But this is not only an apology** -

Casey looked up again and gave Derek a questioning look. She had no idea what was going on. _What else could he be doing other than apologizing to me for today?_ She heard a new song begin and immediately recognized it.

**Maybe it's intuition  
but some things you just don't question  
Like in your eyes,  
I see my future in an instant  
And there it goes,  
I think I found my best friend**

- **I love you** -

Casey still had no idea what was happening, but she wasn't able to tear her eyes away from the papers that were in his hands. She began anticipating the ones that followed, wondering what it was Derek was trying to convey.

**I know that it might sound  
more than a little crazy  
but I believe...**

- **You are the love of my life  
my heart  
my soul  
my everything **–

**I knew I loved you before I met you  
I think I dreamed you into life**

- **It may not have been love initially** -

**I knew I loved you before I met you  
I have been waiting all my life**

-** But looking back I knew something was always there **-

Casey felt the same. She knew that she had always felt a connection with Derek. Even if it wasn't from the moment they met, she knew now that she always loved him. And she would love him forever.

**There's just no rhyme or reason  
Only the sense of completion  
And in your eyes**

The next paper had the most amazing image of a pair of blue eyes Casey had ever seen.

**I see the missing pieces I'm searching for  
I think I've found my way home**

- **You are my home** -

Casey looked up and she finally saw it. She finally saw what Derek was hiding this week. She realized what this was.

**I know that it might sound  
more than a little crazy  
but I believe... **

- **This is why I have been acting strange all week** -

**I knew I loved you before I met you  
I think I dreamed you into life  
I knew I loved you before I met you  
I have been waiting all my life**

- **I couldn't look at you  
because I knew you would have seen it** -

**A thousand angels dance around you  
I am complete now that I've found you**

- **You really do complete me** -

**I knew I loved you before I met you  
I think I dreamed you into life  
I knew I loved you before I met you  
I have been waiting all my life**

- **And I don't want to ever feel incomplete again** -

Silent tears began to fall down Casey's face.

-**Those better be tears of joy** -

**I knew I loved you before I met you  
I think I dreamed you into life  
I knew I loved you before I met you  
I have been waiting all my life**

Though the tears didn't stop, Casey smiled. Derek knew her all too well. He knew exactly when she was going to start crying.

**I knew I loved you before I met you  
I knew I loved you  
I knew I loved you before I met you  
I knew I loved you before I met you**

- **Here goes nothing** -

Derek dropped the last piece on paper onto the floor as the music stopped playing. He walked the few steps across the room and stopped in front on Casey. Lifting his hand, he gently brushed the tears off of Casey's face, caressing her cheek for a moment.

He was nervous. This was the most nerve wrecking point in his life. He was about to ask Casey a question that would change both of their lives forever. Although he was sure she felt exactly the same way about him that he felt about her, his stomach was in knots.

Casey saw the anxiety in Derek, she saw the fear in his eyes. She slowly brought her hand up to her face, placing it on his hand. Giving it a gentle squeeze, she silently told him to continue, that he had nothing to worry about.

Taking his hand back, Derek slowly bent down on one knee. He looked up into Casey eyes and noticed that she was crying again. He would have gotten up and wiped her tears again, but he was afraid he would lose his confidence and back out.

Closing his eyes for a moment, Derek took a deep breathe. He grabbed Casey hand in his own and looked into her eyes.

"Casey, you and I both know I am not good with words, but I will try and make this as eloquent as I possible can." He took another deep breathe, feeling like he needed more oxygen than he normally did. "It has been about 7 years that I have known of my feelings towards you, but I think they have always been there. Since the moment I met you, I felt that we had a connection. I am sorry that I tried to deny that for so long. But these past 5 years have shown me that you are the only one for me. You are the missing piece to my puzzle. You complete me. Not a day goes by that I don't worry that this has all been a dream. I wake up everyday praying that you are next to me. And when I see you, I can't help but pull you closer. I need to feel you against me, I need to feel you to know you are there."

Pausing for a moment, Derek tried to collect his thoughts, he felt he was rambling. He now thought he should have written all of this on a piece of paper, but he wanted it to come from his lips, from his heart.

"I am drawn to everything about you. Everyday you amaze me. You brighten my day with just your smile. The sound of your voice is like music to my ears. I want – no, I need you in my life until the day I die. Without you I am nothing, and I couldn't live if you weren't in my life."

Taking one last deep breathe, Derek took his hands away from Casey's and reached into his pocket. Taking out the small black box Derek began again.

"If you give me the chance, I will try my hardest to make you happy for the rest of your life. I will do anything in my power to never make you cry or hurt you. I am so sorry for this past week, but I didn't want you to know what I was planning. You know me too well and I know you would have seen it in my eyes."

As Derek opened the small box, Casey took her eyes off of Derek's and looked at the ring. She brought her hands up to cover her gaping mouth. It was the most amazing ring she had ever seen. It was absolutely breathtaking, with a relatively large diamond in the center of 2 sapphires all set in white gold. It was nothing she ever expected.

"Casey, will you marry me?"

With tears flowing freely, Casey vigorously nodded her head. She fell to her knees and leaned into Derek, wrapping her arms around his neck. Pulling her closer to him, Derek brought his arms around Casey's waist, situating her between his legs and bringing her body flush against his own.

Casey brought her head to Derek's neck and started whispering yes over and over into his shirt. When she was finally able to control her tears, she pulled back and noticed that a few stray tears had made their way out of Derek's eyes.

As she wiped his face with her left hand, Derek grabbed her wrist and placed the ring on her finger. He looked up to find a huge grin on Casey's face.

"Don't you ever say you don't have a way with words again." Casey then leaned in and kissed him on the lips. Breaking it for air, she whispered "I love you."

Leaning his forehead against hers, Derek smiled. "I love you too." Suddenly, Derek remembered something else. "And I still haven't told you the good news."

"There's more?"

Derek pulled Casey closer to him and placed a soft kiss on her mouth. He began to trail kisses across her cheek to her ear. When he found his destination he whispered. "I was offered a job at that school in Toronto too."


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20: A Final Thank You

Grabbing the two cups of coffee and balancing the plate of raspberry cookies on his arm, Derek made his way from the kitchen to the dining room table. Slight disappointment came over him as he thought that the cookies would have tasted much better if Casey made them and they weren't store bought, but he quickly dismissed the thought, knowing that she hadn't had the time to bake recently.

Coming up behind Casey, Derek placed the cookies next to her, along with the two cups. Wrapping an arm around Casey from behind the chair, he softly kissed the small area behind her right ear. Despite the chair in the way, he still thought it was a perfect fit.

"I still can't believe you managed to get a tan." Derek whispered against Casey's skin as he began to plant small kisses down her neck.

Laughing slightly, she responded "In case you forgot, our suite was the only one with roof access. And neither of us has a tan line."

Turning around, Casey noticed the dreamy look in Derek's eyes, as if he was reliving the past week over again. Smiling at the grin that began to form on his face, she gave him a quick kiss on the lips before turning back what she was doing. Feeling Derek's arm grip her a little tighter and his chin resting on her shoulder, Casey leaned her head over a little so that their cheeks were touching.

"Need help?" he asked, although he already knew what the answer would be.

"With the writing? Not until the last one." Gesturing towards the pile she already completed and the envelopes next to them, she continued. "Do you mind filling those out?"

Kissing her cheek before letting her go he said "Not at all."

Sitting next to Casey, he handed her a cookie and placed a cup in front of her. Grabbing a cookie for himself, he looked at the first card on the pile that Casey had already filled out. He didn't bother to read what she wrote, thinking that whatever was written would have been perfect anyway, he just looked at who it was addressed to. Thumbing though their address book, he found the appropriate name and began to fill out the envelope. Placing the card inside and sealing it, he looked for the stamps. Seeing they were in front of Casey, he reached out with his left hand to grab them, but stopped when he saw what he was wearing.

As Casey completed yet another thank you note, she went to get a sip from her coffee when she noticed Derek's stilled hand in mid-reach for the stamps. Looking up at his face, she noticed the happy smile on his lips. Knowing he was thinking of the inscription on the inside of both of their wedding bands, she leaned over and kissed his cheek while handing him the stamps.

Before continuing, Casey looked down to her own wedding band. Thinking back to when they decided on an inscription, she inwardly laughed at the confused reaction her family and friends had. It wasn't the standard inscription people usually got. It wasn't 'I love you' or 'Always and Forever' or something along those lines. It wasn't typical, but then again the love between Derek and Casey wasn't found everyday. So they chose an inscription that would mean something to them, even if it left people bewildered.

The two words engraved on the inside of both of their rings was 'Cannon Ball'.

Glancing out of the corner of his eye, Derek noticed Casey's gaze was on her left hand. Nudging her with his elbow, she glanced up at him.

"We're different, aren't we Mrs. Venturi?"

Casey's smile broadened at her new name. "Yeah, I guess we are. But I wouldn't have it any other way."

And it was true. They were different, and everyone noticed it. No one seemed to understand them, even though they tried to countless times. People always tried to understand their bond, what it was that made them so close, how with one look an entire conversation passed between them. But as hard as any one who knew them tried, no one could ever understand them. And this became even more evident a few months ago.

When Derek proposed to Casey, everyone expected a long engagement. After it was announced that the wedding would be early that August, a little more than 4 months from the proposal, everyone was shocked. They couldn't understand why they would want to get married so soon. The only response anyone received from Casey and Derek was 'It's been long enough'.

And in reality, they really couldn't wait to be married. They had lived together for 8 years and had been together for a little less than 5. Both were ready for that next step and they figured there was no reason to wait. Besides, they were both looking forward to the steps that followed. Jobs, a home, a family. They were truly looking forward to te life ahead of them.

So, the weekend after their family returned from their vacation, celebrating Lizzie and Edwin's upcoming graduation, Casey and Derek took their own little vacation. They traveled to Toronto in search of a house near their upcoming jobs.

It wasn't surprising to them that they had saved enough money over the years to put a down payment on a house. From the moment they had gotten together they subconsciously controlled their spending. There were no superfluous trips or things bought. All extra money was placed into their separate savings accounts. And after only a few months together, they opened a joint account to save money. Words were never needed and a discussion on what they were saving for was never uttered. It was all understood between the two, even if it was on a subconscious level at the time.

So, after a few phone calls and visits to houses, both fell in love with a huge 4 bedroom house. It wasn't terribly out of their price range, and with their upcoming full time jobs and Derek's well paying artistic talent they decided they would begin the process of making it their home.

Nora, along with Casey's close girl friends, seemed completely upset and disgusted by Casey lack of wanting a huge wedding. When she had mentioned that she wanted no more that about 50 people at the wedding and reception, many questions were asked. Casey merely shrugged, explaining that she and Derek had already discussed it. They didn't feel the need for a large ceremony with people who didn't really understand them. Derek and Casey only wanted those that were important to them to be there. Only those that really mattered would be involved in the happiest day of their life, or at least the happiest day until the day their family would grow.

Besides, they didn't really feel that the ceremony was all that important. They were looking forward to the years to follow more than the actual day.

This caused problems to arise with Derek and his father. Derek did not want to invite his mother to the wedding. When this was mentioned, Casey completed understood, letting Derek know that it was his choice. She knew that he did not have the best relationship with his mother Abby, and she knew that he only wanted people who cared about him and Casey around on that day. It took a little time for Derek to explain this to his father, and after threatening that he would take Casey to city hall and just get married there, George finally backed down.

The thing that shocked people most was that Derek and Casey decided not to write their own vows. Most people thought that they would want to express themselves in a more meaningful way, like they did at every passing chance. It actually sickened people to see how lovey they were with one another.

Although they told everyone that they just wanted to be traditional, that was not the real reason. Derek and Casey decided to stick to the script for one reason. Well, 2 actually. First, they both figured they would wind up saying the same things, things that they already knew and didn't need to be told. The reasons why they loved each other were said countless times before, especially through their eyes, and a big ordeal to tell the people at the wedding was not necessary.

The second reason was that they figured at some point during their confessions of love both were going to wind up crying, and Casey definitely did not was teary eyed pictures taken.

So the second wedding joining a MacDonald and Venturi came. Excitement filled the church and a lone Casey walked down the aisle. Derek offered on countless occasions to ask his own father to walk her down the aisle, but she refused. Casey was fine with her father problems, or she at least didn't let them bother her anymore. She also knew that one day her own children will know the love of both parents, a love that will never be questioned or doubted. And after a few discussions with Derek, seeing the excitement in his eyes about one day becoming a father, she had no doubts that he would never follow in her own father's footsteps.

Smiles were shared, pictures were taken, cake was eaten and dances were danced. And with one look in the other's eyes, both Casey and Derek knew that they were where they were supposed to be.

About a week after their wedding, Casey and Derek sat in the dining room of their home. It was already set up, since they moved in a few weeks before the wedding. So the only boxes around were of the weddings gifts that they were given.

Placing the finishing touches on the thank you card Casey was currently writing, she handed it to Derek who was waiting to fill out the envelope. Casey crossed off the second to last name on her list of people to send cards to. With just one name, or rather family, left on her list she turned to face her husband.

"Ready?"

Pulling his chair over so that the edges of his own chair were touching Casey's, Derek placed his arm around her shoulder and nodded. After a small discussion, while Casey took down notes, they began to write out their final thank you card.

After Derek wrote the familiar address on the envelope and placed the stamp in the upper corner, her turned and pulled Casey over to him. With her side flush against his, Casey leaned into his shoulder and rested her head.

"I love you" she whispered.

Intertwining her fingers with his own, he placed their hands in his lap as he kissed the top of her head. "I love you too Casey."

* * *

A few days later, Marti was coming home from playing with a friend. Noticing the mail was delivered, she grabbed it before entering the house. Flipping through it quickly, she noticed the familiar handwriting of her older brother and noticed it was address to the Venturi/MacDonald family.

Calling everyone into the dining room, Marti handed the envelope to Nora and sat down at the table, quickly followed by the rest of the family. As Nora opened the envelope, she noticed it was a thank you card from the newlyweds. Smiling, she began to read out loud.

**Dear Mom, Dad, Edwin, Lizzie and Marti,**

**First and foremost, we would like to thank all of you for the wedding and the wonderful honeymoon you sent us on. Hawaii was amazing and as soon as we get the pictures developed we will visit to show them to you.**

**Secondly, words cannot possibly explain how much gratitude we feel towards all of you. It is one thing to be supportive and happy of our situation, but to not judge means more than anything to us. You will never know how grateful we feel to have you all as our family. **

**We would also like to thank you for everything you have done for us over the years. If you had pushed us sooner than we might not have developed the friendship we had first. And if you pushed us later, we might have given up and missed out on the chance of true happiness. **

**Lastly, thank you for being who you are. Thank you for being understanding and open-minded. Thank you for loving us and allowing us to be happy. Thank you so much for everything.**

**With all our love and appreciation,**

**Casey and Derek**

Looking up, noticing the watery eyes of every member of the family, Nora wiped at her own eyes. She slowing got up and walked over to the shelf that held many pictures. Picking up Casey and Derek's wedding picture, she opened the blank half of the frame and placed the thank you card in the other slot.

For some reason, when they bought the frame a few days ago, they all seemed to know they were going to need a double frame instead of a single one.

* * *

A/N: Well, that's the end. This was my first fic and I am sad to see it go. I really hope you all like it. Thank you all for reading and a special thanks to those who reviewed. It meant a lot.

I am sorry for the many mistakes in this story. I didn't have a beta and I guess I never noticed the mistakes when I reread the chapters before putting them on the site. Maybe one day I will go back and fix them, but I'm lazy so I probably won't.

Thanks once again and I really hope you all enjoyed my take on our favorite couple.


End file.
